<p>My personality type and gender socialization is such that this is one issue I’d only help with close friends…and ideally, that help is limited to my referring them to another friend(with his prior approval) who is a much more of a natural and at ease with the counselor role.</p>
<p>It’s not something I’d be remotely inclined to doing for acquaintances or “friends” like how you’d describe your S’ ex. Too busy and IMO, asking for help with such matters is a serious and unreasonable imposition for an acquaintance or casual friend to impose on others. Especially if said individual is not the natural at ease counseling type. In short, it’s not your son’s job/duty to be his ex’s therapist. </p>
<p>Hi cobrat, I agree with you that the “counseling type” job is what he should not take. The kind of help he had offered was unrelated to this.</p>
<p>For the counselor job, my guess is that he has suggested her to consult with one of her close female friends or a real professional at school (or even her own mother if she’s willing to do so with the one in her family who knows/loves her the best.)</p>
<p>It seems she needs some friend to drive her to the hospital soon and I hope DS will not be asked to do so, or if asked, he has the “courage” to ask her to ask her other friend who is more appropriate to serve this role now. (Driving her to somewhere will bring back his previous unpleasant memory. And they need some “space” between them.)</p>