<p>CC tends to be a bright, informed group of people so I’m hoping for some insight, advice, or opinions. I’m wise enough to take this advice for what it is and will seek some professional help, but like many parents on here I research and read and try to be the best parent I can. D is our oldest child, and I’ve often said to her that her father and I are learning as we go along and have been for 17 years </p>
<p>Last night D approached me about some emotional problems she’s been experiencing for a couple of months. I’ve felt something wasn’t quite right with her world and tried to be there for her and help in whatever way I could so it wasn’t completely surprising. To put it in her words, she finds little joy in the “little things” recently and is often disappointed at the “big things.” She feels like she’s constantly “pmsing” and is prone to crying about things she would normally not cry about. </p>
<p>While she hasn’t experienced any major changes in her life this year such as divorce or deaths, it has been a year of lots of firsts and lots of growing up in terms of the things teens go through. She’s had to deal with choosing to break up with a “long term” boyfriend that everyone thought was wonderful except her. She’s faced enormous peer pressure regarding drinking and sex (her best friend lost her viginity this year). She’s also a junior so that means the SAT is soon, a couple of AP tests this spring, the college search is inevitable, etc. </p>
<p>She has also experienced some physical changes that alone might be meaningless but combined are becoming concerning. A few months ago she started having her period every 17-19 days. That went on for a couple of months. It’s now back to 21-24 days which is a bit more normal. (in the past she was on a 28 day cycle) She has also gained some fat. I would say she’s gained weight, but she is an athlete that does aerobic and weight training about 15-20 hours a week. She tends to gain weight as her muscles build, but not fat. It’s not been enough that she can’t wear her clothes, but enough so that it’s distressing to her as clothes have become tighter. </p>
<p>I’ve always said that this child was born with a strong sense of justice and is pretty sensitive as to how people treat one another. Part of me thinks she’s being to truly understand that humans are not perfect and many of the things she’s experiencing emotionally are normal teen stuff. Part of me is concerned enough that I’ll be scheduling a visit with her doctor. I plan to ask him to run some blood tests(hormone levels, blood sugar, etc.) to rule out any physical causes for these changes. There is a history of diabetes in older adults in my family. H’s sister is bipolar so there is that as well. </p>
<p>As I initially asked, any insights or advice (especially concerning what to ask the dr.) would be greatly appreciated.</p>
<p>I’m no more of an expert than you are, but the combination of hyper-emotionality, menstrual cycle changes, and fat deposits in a young woman who is extremely active screams hormonal problems to me. I think you are wise to look into medical issues first. If those are ruled out (and I’m sure other posters will have some specific conditions to ask about), and even if something is diagnosed, I think that a good therapist could be very helpful during this difficult time, just to help her cope with all the changes and transitions.</p>
<p>First, I agree that I would ask that D’s hormone levels be very carefully checked. The change in menses, in addition to the other changes could be an important symptom. (The advice of an endocrinologist may be helpful here.)</p>
<p>Second, in retrospect, I see that my first bout of depression took place during my junior year in high school. I felt much as you describe your daughter’s feelings. I continued to function well with regard to school and grades, but I was profoundly aware that I was just not “right,” and in the ways you describe. We didn’t know much about Depression back in those dark ages. It wasn’t until I was in my 30’s that I was properly diagnosed and determined that FOR ME, a small dose of an antidepressant was a life-changing intervention. So I would think that this is another something that bears scrutiny.</p>
<p>But most important, as it sounds like your daughter is quite self aware and you, too, have noticed these things, I caution against the possibility that your concerns are shrugged off by a health professional as “just part of growing up.” This sounds like more.</p>
<p>I think you’re wise to stay on top of this, but not to express undue alarm. </p>
<p>Ask her if she’s getting enough sleep, waking up in the middle of the night or other disturbed sleep patterns should be noted. I know you mentioned gaining weight but has her appitite changed significantly? Is she social at school? Any major changes in her social network? Any significant changes in the way she relates to you and other family members?</p>
<p>Of course if she feels that she’s being interogated, it’s likely she’ll shut down. So, keep things conversational and supportive.</p>
<p>Remember, sometimes things are multi-determined and there are a number of causative factors. There could be emotional, medical and social determinants that are resulting in her malaise.</p>
<p>Our 16 yr old daughter is a deep, complicated, and mysterious soul. She’s had her moments when we’ve been quite concerned about her. </p>
<p>You sound like a very concerned and reasonable parent who can be a source of support to your daughter. Good luck.</p>
<p>Please, please get her thyroid checked. It’s a simple blood test. I’ve got Hashimoto’s disease, diagnosed at age 9, and those are the exact symptoms. It’s not a disease of emotion or growing up, it’s a physical problem that can lead to serious consequences. It’s so easily treatable, too, sothere’s no reason to suffer needlessly.</p>
<p>The menstrual issues are a warning sign that this is likely a medical problem.</p>
<p>I agree with having her thyroid checked, as well as screening for PCOS (polycystic ovarian syndrome). A good friend of D’s was recently diagnosed with that after a couple of years of irregular periods and unexplained weight gain.</p>
<p>Don’t panic though…sometimes odd menstrual cycles are just that; odd…My d went through all the testing to find out nothing was wrong, but 17-19 days for her (or her parents) was just not going to fly (especially with the assorted symptoms)…A very low dose contraceptive has done the trick…back to normal…Good Luck!</p>
<p>Totally agree: The product of the Thyroid is a hormone, as are the estrogen, progesterone, etc. that we tend to think of. I don’t think that a consultation with a specialist in endocrinology is over the top. That is how a young friend with PCOS was diagnosed.</p>
<p>Thank you all for the wonderful suggestions so far! Keep it coming as I totally forgot about the thyroid. Should not have as my sister had thyroid cancer and according to her doctors her female relatives should be “aware” of thyroid issues. </p>
<p>maximus–no real changes in social networks or sleep patterns. Her relationship with us and her brother remains the same. As hard as it is sometimes not to interogate, that’s been our standard of practice. It seems to have worked as she speaks with us frequently and comfortably about a wide variety of personal topics. </p>
<p>Again, thank you so much for the suggestions thus far.</p>
<p>Looks to me like you are on the right track. The emotional symptoms sound like depression, which can be caused by other medical issues, like hormones or disease. Don’t forget to carefully examine other medicines she is taking, too. A lot of medicines can trigger depression (this happened to me one time), and it’s really easy for even doctors not to think of this.</p>
<p>Getting a physical sounds like a great place to start. Good luck.</p>
<p>My MIL was bipolar, so that screamed “red flag” at me. I think everyone who’s posted is dead on with the hormonal suggestions, but I <em>also</em> think that your daughter might find a consultation with a good counselor helpful, if only because she should learn some coping mechanisms for dealing with the hormonal swings. </p>
<p>My D went through something similar at about the same age. No medical problems were found–just “normal” overreactivity to hormones. Now at 22 she chooses to be on birth control pills because she likes the smoothing out of the hormonal issues. I felt the same way at her age!</p>
<p>" I think everyone who’s posted is dead on with the hormonal suggestions, but I <em>also</em> think that your daughter might find a consultation with a good counselor helpful, if only because she should learn some coping mechanisms for dealing with the hormonal swings."</p>
<p>Brilliant advice. I’ve been on thyroid medication since I was 9, but it has to be changed every so often (in certain circumstances, often), and I suffer with horrible feelings of hopelessness during those times and coping skills are priceless.</p>
<p>SEATOFMYPANTS - it certainly sounds like you are pretty much on top of things with your DD and rightfully concerned. It may be that a good and complete physical - with all the lab work that goes with it - would be a good place to start - check her hormonal levels - her blood counts ??anemic?? - her thyroid function, etc… and an eval for depression as well. You seem to doing a great job of keeping the lines of communication open as well with her.</p>
<p>This statement could have been about my son. He is exactly the same way. The times he’s been down were primarily because of having his eyes opened to social injustices in the world. That’s a tough one to deal with. Mom & Dad can’t make it better.</p>
<p>I started a thread a few months ago with nearly the same title, with the same question.</p>
<p>What is beginning to help him is involvement in activism, so he can feel that he is doing something about it.</p>
<p>Yes, it could be any of these thing–quite likely a combination. Thyroid is the first thing that popped into my mind. Sometimes a single blood test fails to uncover a thyroid problem, so bear that in mind. A Dr. visit is the place to start, but I agree with others to be persistent if the first person shrugs it off. And thank your daughter, if you haven’t already, for opening up to you. Keep us posted.</p>
<p>Very good point above. Not all health-care providers test all the indicators of thyroid function.</p>
<p>Most order the T4 test. However, a more complete picture can be formed with the information from T3 TSH, and/or TRH tests. Unusual results can be examined with a TBG (Thyroid binding globulin) test. (Perhaps there are reimbursement limits coming from insurance providers?) There are also various scans.</p>
<p>I am not a health-care provider. I have, however, been told I had normal thyroid function when only the results of one test were examined, and it turned out that better information was derived by some of the others.</p>
<p>Several of my close relatives have Hashimoto’s disease, and when it looked like I might be developing it, too (turned out to be an unexpected pregnancy with S2), they recommended a book, which I think is this one:</p>
<p>I called D’s dr. Recommendation was to have her see a gynecolgist as a first step. It just happened that they had an opening for her next week, and I had a previously scheduled appointment today. Today in talking with Dr. about D’s upcoming visit she indicated she would test thyroid levels (I remembered the advice here, but couldn’t recall the specific thyroid tests some of you recommended. I’ll write them down though.) She treats a lot of teenage girls. The likely first step is birth control pills to do what they do…While she is not sexually active, she will be reminded that birth control pills do not prevent disease. </p>
<p>I’m leaving it up to D as to whether I’m present for the physical exam (no internal exam which D was worried about) and discussion. I’m aware that as open as she is about things with us, maybe there is something we don’t know. </p>
<p>I was aware that some athletic girls stop menstruating, but I was unaware that some will do so more frequently. I learned that today. Knowing what her training schedule was over the summer, fall, and currently I see that as a real possibility. </p>
<p>The dr’s D is the same age and also athletic so she is personally knowledgable about how that can affect hormones, mood, etc. Dr. is also very aware of the many stresses on teens during their junior year. She mentioned depression. She also mentioned PCOS as well as many of the other ideas posted by many of you. I know I feel better about the situation. </p>
<p>It’s a first step, and I know D was happy to learn last night there was some movement in getting her some help. I think she’ll be even more relieved today when I tell her about the discussion. </p>
<p>It may sound sappy, but I really can’t express how grateful I am to each of you that took the time to respond to my OP. Raising teens is hardwork and few of my friends have children this age. It was good to get advice from those that are in the trenches!</p>
<p>Seatofmypants, I’ve been thinking of you and am glad that you posted an update. It sounds like you and your daughter have a great relationship. I’m sure you will get to the bottom of this!</p>
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