UC #2- serving experience

<p>prompt stated below…please tell me what you think, how i can improve…thank you!</p>

<p>Prompt #2 (all applicants)
Tell us about a personal quality, talent, accomplishment, contribution or experience that is important to you. What about this quality or accomplishment makes you proud and how does it relate to the person you are?</p>

<p>“Refill on diet, easy ice this time”, my table 18 waves. I add this task to my mental list of things to do: close out my table 19, check on my teenage guests at table 55, and drop the check off to the elderly couple at table 48. My feet hurry to keep up with my racing mind that is working double time to prioritize the demands of my job as a server. The goal: complete every task thoroughly and efficiently to ensure every guest will return happily.</p>

<p>As I round the corner and drop the diet refill off, I notice the host seat table 54 with a family of five. The host, with a nod, signals for me to take the table. It all seems overwhelming and the stress begins to build. My heart pounds as I contemplate my next move. Do I surrender and allow for momentary relief, or do I persevere and reach my goal?</p>

<p>I take a deep breath, and with a sense of urgency my step quickens as I close out 19, assure 55 is happy, and drop the bill off to 48. Satisfied with my multi tasking, I slide over to 54 and cheerfully greet my new table of five.</p>

<p>Serving is a job that requires patience, the ability to multi task, the ability to socialize, as well as a quick set of feet. Every work day presents a different challenge. There are times when I have to handle multiple tables simultaneously and feel as though I am spread too thin. There are instances when I have a guest who will complain about anything and everything in hopes of free food. I endure these days because it is well worth the moment when a guest personally thanks me for my exceptional service.</p>

<p>Meeting the goals of being a server has allowed me to pursue my greater goal: a degree in biomedical engineering so that I could become a doctor. Not only has serving allowed me to financially pursue my educational goals, but it has also taught me disciplines such as organization and effective communication skills. It is my experience as a server that has strengthened my character and driven my will to succeed. My dedication to serving exemplifies my desire to take care of all types of people from all walks of life and at every age from babies to seniors.</p>

<p>You should never start with a quote.
The essay is pretty decent.
The endind-just say “from all ages and all walks of life.”</p>

<p>there is nothing wrong with starting with a quote as the introduction with this type of essay. this is not an analytical piece, its creative and just go with what you feel. Colleges like to see dialogue and imagery and you accomplished both. Good luck! i wouldn’t worry about this essay though, its really good!!</p>

<p>thanks…i thought i should’ve just written that way in the first place…it does sound much better reading that part aloud</p>

<p>jazlaumir- thanks…but do you feel it answers prompt enough? or any suggestions to make it flow a little better? i normally have a hard time with conclusions</p>

<p>well i personally think that the essay does fit the prompt. most people would probably write about playing piano or singing idk… i think that saying that being a server is a talent has a nice angle that not alot of people would use as their hook. </p>

<p>as for the conclusion…well i it was me, i would talk about how being a server has improved certain personal traits as well as enlightened you about other abilities you didn’t know you had. the information about your dream profession they can get from your major choice and there will be alot of people striving to get in with the same reason you do: medicine. they want to know more about the person you are rather than just goals. This is the hardest part of essay writing i believe. just constantly ask yourself if you feel that this essay truly embodies who you are as a person as well as the potential you can bring to their school.</p>