<p>i am not really old nor am I really wise.
However, it does seem to me that a prerequisite to “true” unconditional love is that two people share the same DNA. All other love ultimately is conditional.</p>
<p>I would disagree.</p>
<p>I don’t think you can love someone else unconditionally, unless you love yourself first & I don’t mean a narcissist, I mean someone who forgives themselves & moves on.
DNA has nothing to do with it.</p>
<p>Does that mean we can’t unconditionally love our in-laws? Please don’t tell mine that, since we do love one other. Some of my friends & I don’t share DNA but I think we share unconditional love as well.</p>
<p>Interesting thought. What about children who are adopted? I’m sure their adoptive parents love them as unconditionally as birth parents (and some of those don’t pass the test, anyway).</p>
<p>I’ve been thinking a lot about this kind of thing, lately because I have been on the Casey Anthony thread. I wonder about the extent that parental love can go. Are there any circumstances that you can imagine that would break you from your child? And would you truly do ANYTHING for them? I guess I have been thinking about whether I would be willing to lie on the stand for my child if I really thought it was true that they had committed a terrible crime.</p>
<p>And do relationships benefit or suffer from this kind of unconditional love when it is exercised as a way to prevent natural consequences?</p>
<p>Unconditional love is letting them make their mistakes, having their beliefs, and loving them anyway. It is not necessarily liking the person/child all of the time, or agreeing with what they do all of the time. And it is certianly not compromising your own values or self for someone. Rather loving that person despite their faults, and through what ever mess they get themselves into. In Casey Anthony type of case, it would be hard to be in that position. And it would be hard not to “protect” your child, that is what we are programmed to do as parents. But that is where you have to have your own strong sense of self, your own belief system and morals. That is my opinion at least.</p>
<p>Yep, I saw red when I read the first post. Adoption is common in my extended family. DNA has nothing to do with it. Not only can you love someone who doesn’t share your DNA unconditionally, but there are plenty of people who don’t love their children, parents, grandparents, aunts, uncles, nieces, nephews, cousins, and/or siblings–all of whom share some of their DNA.</p>
<p>Adoption is common in my life as well and it does not seem to affect the degree of unconditional love I see in those relationships.</p>
<p>jonri, I agree.</p>
<p>When my daughter was six months old, someone asked me, “What would you do if you found out your real baby was accidentally switched at birth and you had the wrong child?” I looked at my little girl and said, “I’d say let’s just call it even.” I could never give her up, DNA or no. The love you feel for another human being has little to do with DNA. Some people are incapable of unconditional love no matter who it is, and others find it completely without regard to biology.</p>
<p>I thought this was going to be about dogs.</p>
<p>^^^^^^^^^^^^^Ha Ha, so did I.</p>
<p>I do love my babies…^^^^^^^^^^</p>
<p>^^^
My dog is my favorite person.</p>
<p>My husband loves me unconditionally, despite the dumb and mean things I have done, despite the weight and wrinkles I have gained and the mistakes I have made. I feel the same way about him. We share no DNA.</p>
<p>I also have a couple long-term friends that I love unconditionally, and I know they feel the same about me.</p>
<p>I don’t think unconditional love has anything at all to do with DNA.</p>
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<p>So only identical twins can unconditionally love each other, and that’s the only type of unconditional love in the world?</p>
<p>^good point.</p>
<p>For me, the only prerequisite for giving unconditional love is having a generous, forgiving nature, and being able to love the person with all their faults. The great thing about this kind of love (and I haven’t experienced it as much as I would like) is that by being loved for who you are, you are also loved for who you can be. It’s as if that acknolwedgement of all your human-ness is freeing in a way.</p>
<p>I have a certain canine in mind – you know who you are – c’mere big boy! C’mon!</p>
<p>i’m not sure on this one… you can think you have unconditional love BUT is there something that could break it?..ie unconditional love for husband who has an affair??? i think conditions then come into the picture</p>
<p>There are things that most people in my life could do where I would have to walk away. But there is nothing my child could do that would make me walk away. There are things that would crush me, that would darn near kill me but I’d still be there in someway. </p>
<p>It’s got nothing to do with DNA and everything to do with parental love.</p>
<p>pmk…agree about children,and dont think it is necessarily genetics…our youngest is adopted… no difference in love… and he will be the one that will most likely test that theory</p>
<p>Just to play the curmudgeon, I have to think unconditional love doesn’t really exist, because frankly I don’t think anyone can define it, the way it is hard to define love. If a spouse cheats and the other person leaves them for it, is that unconditional love? And actually, if someone stays with a spouse who is cheating, where does unconditional love end and being a doormat end?</p>
<p>They may claim they love the other person, and maybe they do, but their actions could be easily construed as not loving them any more. I have seen kids whose parents, who claimed to love them, threw them out of the house because they somehow didn’t meet parents expectations, whether it was over religious beliefs or lifestyle or the like, they might claim they love their child, but is that unconditional? Even with babies , where the feelings are so strong, there are conditions that can make a parent walk away, despite all the love and feelings they have. </p>
<p>My take is that with very few people is there anything approaching unconditional love with anything, that there are breaking points, conditions, that are deal breakers, which by its definition should not happen. For some people, it can take a spouse getting older and losing their physical looks, for others it would take something major, like uncontrolled alchoholism or some major change in the other person.</p>