I’m the valedictorian or salutatorian at my high school who everyone expects to go to a top university. Everyone expects me to do great things. I don’t REALLY want to go to college. I don’t want to do anything. I have no real goals or ambitions and I’ve just been doing all that I have to every year to get where I am today. I was rejected to all of my slightly selective universities and am only in three safeties, none of which I love or could see myself going to. If I don’t pursue further education, I will feel like my entire education thus far was a waste of time, but I can’t justify that type of money to do nothing. So, what do I do?
I have a month to figure my life out and make the most important decisions I ever will. I’m so lost.
No you don’t just have a month to figure out your life. You have a lifetime. You can make plans for a few months or you can simply give college a try. Then you can change your mind and try something else. Stop making the decision bigger than it is. Your education to date will never be a waste of time. You got educated right? You simply need a bit more to be an educated adult. Stop looking at college like it is some sort of big trophy or prize for work completed to date.It’s a place to go to get some more education. No more. No less.
Hi @Whatdoido12 - I’m sorry you’re feeling this way. Let me just say, though, education is never a waste of time.
Have you talked to your parents about it? What was your plan before you received the rejections? What had you been planning to do? Why did you choose the schools you did? Maybe you just need some time to sit and let everything digest a little bit.
Or maybe you need a bit of time to figure out what you want to do with your life. There’s no shame in that. Is a gap year a possibility?
@Whatdoido12 I totally get it. Anyone who has extra emotions laying around at the end of this journey is a rare person…you’re just burnt out.
Here’s what you should do: Attend the admitted students day for each of the schools. Decide which one you like most. Put down your deposit. My guess is that at this point, your enthusiasm will have returned. If it hasn’t, consider asking for a one-year deferral. And begin looking at gap year ideas. you have many options.
That seems strange. If your the valedictorian, your GPA must be really high. I feel like you should have cast a wider net of schools. The high transcript is given the most weight in admissions, but then again I dont know your other STATS
And, while you are on that gap year, if you decide that you’d rather study a trade than lock yourself into four (or more) years of the academic grind, that’s OK too. My auto mechanic loves his job and wouldn’t trade it for anything. Ditto for my brother-in-law who is a Mississippi River pilot, and for my nephew-in-law who has just passed his exams and now is a journeyman steamfitter. The world is big. There are lots of interesting jobs out there. Take some time to see what all of your options really are.
Not knowing what you want to do or be at 18 is perfectly normal. I was very smart in HS and did very well but didn’t want to go to college right away. I chose a different path, did some traveling but never did I stop my education, even though I wasn’t enrolled in college I was continually learning in everything I did, every interaction I had and everyplace I went. I eventually returned to formal education in my mid 20’s, completed both and undergraduate degree and graduate degree but some days I think it was the education that I received during those first few years after high school that have done me the most good. If my D came to me and said she didn’t want to go to college right away I’d be disappointed because that’s the “norm”, I’m supposed to want my D to go to college but after I got over the disappointment I’d help her figure out her next steps. With all that said your message does have some concern for clinical depression so you should discuss all of this with your parents and/or a medical or psychological provider. Live is overwhelming, senior year is crazy and sometimes we just need a little help. Good luck in whatever you decide.
Certainly you chose your safeties for a reason- what are the safeties and what were your reasons for each?
Between one of them and a gap year, what would you prefer? (Keep in mind that the colleges that rejected you are now off limits).
What are your stats? Your parents’ budget?
In early May a list of colleges that miscalculated yield will be published, there are always good colleges there - depending on your stats there may be something for you there.
So, really, you have three possibilities:
- gap year
- one of three universities that admitted you
- May list
OP: You may need a break. Consider taking a gap year to work, travel or do research.
Princeton University’s head of admissions brought the concept of a gap year into the mainstream about 10 or 12 years ago.
Take a year to mature further & to get a sense of direction. It should strengthen your application if you reapply in a year.
Nontraditional students returning to college after (possibly many) gap years were probably a lot more common / mainstream before elite colleges suggested deferring enrollment for a gap year.
Indeed, the GI Bill in the 1940s sent many students to college after gap years in military service during World War II.
I am / was referring to a planned gap year.
You’re naturally upset. And more than a little angry at the process. You’ve given it your all and feel like it’s unfair. All those late nights and extra credit papers to get to the top of your class.
It’s ok to feel that way for a couple of days.
If you visit the schools and don’t want to attend. Take a year off and work.
I promise you after a year of working full time, you’ll jump at any fine school that accepts you next year. College is not a coal mine. It’s an experience and an opportunity.
With your brains and work ethic everything is possible. Just take a breath.
Read a book or go visit your grand parents or crazy uncle or the “cool” parents of your friends. Tell them how you feel and listen to their advice. And then go have a Coke and take a nap.
You’ll feel better in a few weeks.