<p>So here’s something we (spouse and I) are grappling with: Should we keep current jobs X1 and X2 or accept job offers Y1 and Y2 that will require relocation to a different part of the country. Y1 and Y2 are jobs that pay substantially more than our current jobs and have a higher ‘prestige’ or ‘rank’ but come with more aggravation, more excitement (in both a good sense and bad sense) and somewhat higher risks. Also the different part of the country has a much higher cost of living so perhaps the real boost in income is less. As an added bonus we would be closer to family. As a big negative we would have to sell our house in this market and buy a much smaller house. We would have to spend twice as much to get about half the square footage we currently have.</p>
<p>It is very interesting how the process of making the decision is both similar to and different from the College X vs College Y dilemmas that show up on CC, especially in April. Big similarity- at the end of the day the most important factor in our decision will be ‘fit’. The question that will be foremost in our minds will be: which jobs fit better with our overall goals. Finances, weather, urban vs rural, and distance from the rest of the family- all of these factors come into the picture. Big difference- for college students the usual advice is- do not base your decision on where your significant other is going to college. After 24 years of a happy marriage, that is not an option for us. :)</p>
<p>Any thoughts?</p>
<p>How old are those family members? Would this move make it easier to participate in the care of parents or other aging relatives? Would it mean that the grand-kids (or grand-nieces/nephews) can be a bigger part of your livest? Would it mean that you are closer to those family members who you would want to rely upon in your own old age? Would it just plain take all the pain out of holiday travel X times each year in Y kinds of bad weather?</p>
<p>How anxious are you for the new challenges? Are you getting a bit set in your ways, and feel the need to shake up your life a bit?</p>
<p>Are you ready to downsize your house? Would this be a good chance to do that once and for all?</p>
<p>Hmm…I keep telling DH to find a new job where the company will pay to relocate us…and give us the incentive we need to downsize.</p>
<p>How secure are these new jobs? That would be my biggest question. If there is a chance you could be laid off in a year…I’d stay put.</p>
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<p>We did exactly this about 15 years ago. I vividly remember looking at a tiny house in Palo Alto that cost 50% more than what my very large east coast house had sold for, and wondering if it was the real estate agent who was out of his mind or if it was me. We ended up moving into a furnished rental and buying about 4 months later. Not knowing what furniture to bring was a major stress.</p>
<p>We didn’t even move for higher paying jobs, in fact we moved for a job at an internet startup (little pay, ultimately worthless stock options) and the hope of finding a job for me.</p>
<p>One thing that helped make the decision was a list of all the positives and negatives of making the move. Some things are difficult to quantify, but just making the list helped bring into focus the value of moving vs staying put. It sounds like you’ve got a good start on the list, maybe you can give each factor a relative weight to further refine it. And don’t discount gut feel either.</p>
<p>Turns out that the move was the best thing ever for my family.</p>
<p>Thank you guys for the input. We are fortunate in that the jobs are good and fairly secure (to the extent anything is secure).</p>
<p>To stretch the college analogy, suppose you are in a good college and things are going well. Now suppose you get an unsolicited offer from another equally good college with somewhat better merit scholarship. Do you transfer? If you are half-way through a 4-year college, maybe not. But what about a place you might be at for another 10-20 years? Small differences in ‘fit’ and finances could make a big difference over the years.</p>
<p>" Y1 and Y2 are jobs that pay substantially more than our current jobs and have a higher ‘prestige’ or ‘rank’ but come with more aggravation, more excitement (in both a good sense and bad sense) and somewhat higher risks."</p>
<p>Kind of a coincidence, me and my husband had this same situation a couple of years ago, and we took jobs Y1 and Y2. Glad we did it, like the money and responsibility, which is more fun…but it comes with a higher level of stress and risk.</p>
<p>But we didn’t have to move, or change companies. It sounds to me that since it may be a wash financially and even job satisfaction wise, the tradeoffs might be equal…where do you see yourself living for the next several years of your life? Not where should you live to take responsibility for other people (because honestly, I think it is very unfair for a parent who needs care to expect you to rearrange your entire life to come to them, as opposed to them moving closer to you—that is if that is the issue you’re grappling with). Where would YOU like to live? Does this change sound interesting, exciting and appealing enough to rearrange your entire life for? It is difficult and stressful to move. Is this where and what you would like to be doing for the next several years of your lives?</p>