Anyway, yesterday was my son’s grad school graduation. It felt so bittersweet to not be there in person. His wife bought cap and gown and decorations from PARTY City, and I sent over little Bundt cakes, with graduation toppers ( so cute). We all joined a zoom party, plus watched the graduation on another computer. In the department ceremony, Each grad Sent in a picture and a short statement. Besides his committee, he thanked me and his wife.
His wife had asked people to send her videos, with Congrats. She put together about 45 videos. They had a “party” with His HS friends, and then a special dinner.
I shared my 3 minute tape with 2 friends, and had drinks with my neighbors on the driveway. As I wrote, so bittersweet.
Yesterday was my DD graduation. It was actually better then I expected from virtual graduation. We decorated the house and had her favorite food delivered. We also could spend more on graduation gifts because we saved so much on cross country travel and lodging.
Seal, I felt the same, in terms of $. But then I thought of the medical school graduation that BB referenced, and I recall the joy of receiving the white coat and hearing of the residency match.
I posted this separately from the wedding thread, so to not confuse issues. It just feels so sad that many of us are missing these very special events.
The little kids in my neighborhood are having drive by ceremonies. To me, that’s not the same as a college, med school, MBA, JD, or grad school ceremony.
Boo hoo here as well…we too, will have a virtual MBA graduation. …and Goskid #1 is getting a Dean’s Distinguished Service award. I’m so sad for her (and all the others!).
I’m sure she remembers one year ago at her brother’s MBA celebration…lots of
hoopla, parties, etc. Her H had a swanky dinner party planned among other things, and we had looked forward to the trip, so lots of disappointment…
Did DS’ virtual graduation last week. The college sent a cap and gown and we logged in for the "ceremony ". It left me in a funk. I think that even live, this is bittersweet for parents. There’s the joy for the accomplishment and the sadness that they are just one step further out of your life. Doing this live, in the company of the rest of the class -with some family who havealso traveled-, really amplifies the celebratory part of it. This virtual gathering amplified the loss of communal celebration and closure without providing a lot of joy or relief from the (healthy) drift from family.
I know, I know. He got a great education. We’re all healthy. I get the context. But it made me realize that this ritual serves a useful role in processing the emotions that accompany it. Getting the degree without the weekend of events that normally go with it just left me wallowing in a mess of feelings. I’m over it now, but admit that it was disappointing.
DS is having his graduation outdoors with everyone in cars watching things on a huge screen. Then they will have a reverse parade where students drive or ride in cars with teachers cheering them on and holding signs. They will stop at the end to get their diploma and gift bag and any awards they earned. The school where I work is doing a reverse parade as well. they feel like pale imitations of what I was expecting would happen pre-pandemic. I’m sad for the kids. DS doesn’t care.
“ But it made me realize that this ritual serves a useful role in processing the emotions that accompany it. “
^^This!! My S’s virtual ceremony lasted 15 minutes. His department, at least, scrolled their names. They’ve promised an in-person ceremony when it’s safe, but I doubt S will be interested by then.
This whole year has been full of unexpected changes that point out how much we value our traditions and gathering with others.
Older S’ graduation was this week. I thought it was well done. They had students send in pics from their time together, so it began with several minutes of that. And then teachers and departments sent in video messages to the grads. And then a speech and they read each name with a pic. And then another pic rotation at the end. I think it took over an hour. I told H that I wished they had included Pomp and Circumstance because for me, hearing that is graduation. So H had Alexa play it during the name reading.
It felt weird and anticlimactic, but I thought they did a good job. And I think all those pics and messages meant more to S since he knew the people/teachers.
Virtual medical school graduation for this family. It was very well done. The school mailed caps, gowns, hoods to the graduates. They were asked to take a picture in their regalia and send them to the school. Short speeches were given by the same people who would have spoken otherwise, except there was no “guest speaker”. Instead the president of the class spoke to his classmates. It was recorded so folks could watch anytime they wanted to…and send the links to any family and friends they wished.
The actual diploma was mailed to the students. The morning of the virtual ceremony, all received a PDF of their diplomas as well. Each student received three hard copies of the graduation program. A PDF of that was also sent to the students.
As each student’s name was called, their picture was shown. The vast majority sent pictures.
It was about 40 minutes long. Everyone we know who watched it, enjoyed it, and applauded the school for a job well done.
One of the coolest things I’ve heard so far is my friend’s sons’ HS in OH. They video taped each student walking across the stage in their cap and gown and receiving their diploma, and edited all together, along with all the graduation speeches. They are showing the ceremony at a local drive in movie theater. Each student is allowed one car full of family members. They are doing fireworks afterwards. Thought this was a lovely idea to be able to view/celebrate together but still safely.
@momofsenior1 - my old HS in Illinois did something similar.
D’s virtual MBA school graduation was 2 weeks ago. She was disappointed b/c mostly it was pre- recorded speeches. Also it was for the entire (large) university and the B school did not have a separate ceremony (which we had planned to attend). We were able to get a photo of the slide with her name and degree on it and see the program on line. It was a let down.
