<p>M was accepted for Jan start for school A and waitlisted for fall. Also accepted at school B for fall start. School B wants deposit and acknowledgment for no other school deposits by May 1. But M really wants to go to school A IF she gets off the waitlist for fall; is it ethical to send commitment and deposit to school B and later pull out if get off waitlist at school A?</p>
<p>If she really wants to go to School A and she has a guaranteed acceptance to start there in January with the possibility of getting off their waitlist for admission for the fall, forget about school B. Congratulate her on getting into school A–her 1st choice. If she doesn’t get off the waitlist for the fall, she can always take a class or two at the local community college and transfer it towards her general education requirements at school A (call the admissions office of school A and see what they think of this idea and if the school will accept the transfer credits).</p>
<p>Pay the deposits for school A-------------------buy the college sweatshirt----------------celebrate.</p>
<p>Consider it a long summer vacation, and enjoy School A. Maybe she can make a few extra bucks to help with tuition. Maybe she should go backpacking in Europe before she has to settle down in college. I wouldn’t let 4 months be the deciding factor to attend School B if she really wants School A.</p>
<p>In answer to your specific question: Clearing Waitlist is an ethical reason to withdraw from another school. You may loose your deposit, but it is an accepted part of the admissions process. Otherwise, how could School B offer admissions to students off their waitlist (encouraging those students to be unethical)?</p>
<p>Get her a nice backpack and send her to Europe.</p>
<p>trouble is she really wants to start school in the fall and school A and B are both pretty good choices/matches for her. we’re primarily concerned about the ethical aspect of the decision but I agree that coming off a waitlist and changing a decision is different than accepting decisions at two admitted schools. Hard to narrow down that final choice-both schools would likely be great.</p>
<p>If school A is not requiring a deposit right now to hold the spring spot, you will not be violating the no other deposit request. You can send it in to school B in clear conscious. This is part of the rules of the game. If she comes off wait list and accepts A, then you loose the deposit at B and notify them. It is the summer melt down. She may still change he mind of she comes off waitlist at A and decide she really likes B best anyhow. You could schedule another visit if it happens and the decision is hard. .</p>
<p>Yes, your within you’re rights to do that.</p>
<p>That said, if it were my DD and she really preferred A, I would encourage her to wait. This is one of those great teaching moments, the subjects here being delayed gratification, rolling with the punches and that good things come to those who wait. Agree she could have a life changing experience with a backpack.</p>
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<p>There are no ethical issues in your situation as you have described it, so stop using it as an excuse to be indecisive. Pick A, B, or B unless A, and be done with it.</p>
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<p>Sometimes you need to tell your kid they are being short-sighted. If College A is anything more than a coin flip better than B, then she should wait and go to A. One semester is nothing compared to 4 years of “I wish I went to College A”.</p>
<p>Some parents mentioned that your daughter go to Europe. Our son took a semester off last fall.
His sister recommended a TEFL program. He is s Spanish major and went to Madrid, took a course in teaching English as a second language. The program we found is Chicago based. The course he took is unrelated to his university so no credits involved. He now has a certificate in TEFL, tutored in Madrid, worked on his Spanish and has a great reference from the director of the program. He made some money (not as much as expected), had a great experience and is now back at his university. There are many options. This worked for him.</p>
<p>We know several kids who have been offered Jan. admission in the last couple of years. In every case, it was their first choice school. They all went to our CC during the Fall semester and then headed off to First choice school in Jan. All are still there and happy with their choice.</p>
<p>Why go to another college or to CC for the fall when the student has a golden opportunity to do something special that they may not have time to do again. For instance, the student could work during the summer and part of the fall, and use their earnings to travel abroad, even doing an immersion program in a foreign language. Or a student could use their earnings to take classes in art, music, dance or something fun that they may not have time to do in college.</p>
<p>She also could be a fulltime volunteer for an organization that she cares about deeply.</p>
<p>Your D has a wonderful opportunity to develop some more facets of herself instead of jumping right into college, particularly one that she doesn’t plan to stay in anyway. Unless she’s planning on majoring in the sciences or math (in which case it would be good to keep those subjects fresh by taking a course or two at community college during the fall), not going to college in the fall won’t hurt her.</p>