Wow I did not see that post coming. That is crazy.
So sorry to hear.
My D20âs roommate died last year this way. Horrific. 
All were over a decade ago. But itâs something that I would never have thought of. Kids drink, lean hard against the window screen and fall. Stumble off a roof (that was actually at C of C)during a party etc. Falls are a leading cause of death in young people and I think alcohol is usually involved.
So coming from 2 lacs and one huge big ten where my kids went to the open house stressed not to have kids come with no drinking experience. They said those kids end up in the ER. They actually suggested letting them have a beer or wine with dinner in a controlled situation (your home). They said those kids just go wild when given the chance and peer pressure. Also there is a reason parent weekend is about 6-8 weeks into their school year. Itâs the time if there is going to be a problem that hopefully the parents can help with it. Found those talks interesting.
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Iâm actually allergic to certain alcohols. Just a little makes me pass out. I was very fortunate in college that nothing bad happened to me.
Never realized that COC was at the intersection of all this sort of risk. Sorry for your loss.
Such ridiculous advice honestly. I know so many parents who let their kids have beers at home and it usually backfires. Itâs concerning to me that a school would make this recommendation.
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3/3 schools all had the same type of speech. We never made a big deal if we had a drink in front of the kids when they were older. At some point they would have a glass of wine with us at dinner. They tasted our beer but never liked it till college 
. The point is more if this is their first exposure, be careful. They told us stories of how many kids end up in the ER the first few weeks of school
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In my opinion this is really the biggest issue to address and what we emphasized with our kids. From a brain development standpoint, young people in their teens to mid twenties have amazing physical ability, good intellect with frontal lobes which are not fully developed. It is the perfect storm of thinking something is safe or a good idea when it is not. Or not even considering whether something is possibly dangerous. Of course alcohol/drugs and peer pressure exacerbate the problems.
It is a scary time for us as parents. We found that it helped to educate our kids as to how brains develop and the reasons why it was important for them to have a support system in place to help them only make small but not life threatening bad choices. The more they know to reach out to their family or trusted friends and to watch out for each other, the better chance they have of avoiding disaster.
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Two of my daughters ended up in the same ER for drunk falls, one was a dance competition (the video was pretty funny) and one was a fall down stairs. Years apart, they attended different colleges. Definitely not due to inexperience with alcohol.
My kids grew up with a bit of freedom, walked to school starting in 2nd grade, had the run of the town by 10, started taking public transportation into NYC around 14 with friends. My daughters have all experienced cars pulling over to talk to them, they brought their birdies and mace to college, were extremely careful about protecting their drinks and staying with others. Unfortunately two of my 22 year oldâs friends were most likely drugged at a local bar the night before thanksgiving. About 50 of them were out, and the two girls ended up walking home alone (no one realized they were gone since it was such a large group). They would never have left on their own (they each had 2 drinks, 1 girl was pretty banged up from falling. They didnât go to the hospital to get tested because it was thanksgiving.
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At one of my daughterâs colleges there were ambulances at the freshmen dorms every single Friday and Saturday night.
Friends in France told me of a custom there : party captain - similar to the buddy system but a bit more formal. A group of 4-6 friends go to a party together; the captain is in charge, canât drink any alcohol nor take any drugs (âsorry, Iâm party captainâ to escape peer pressure), and MUST bring everyone back to their place. If one in the group wants to hook up, they have to find the âcaptainâ and indicate who theyâll be with and/or that they wonât join the group back- if theyâre in no shape to do that then it means theyâre in no shape for anything.
Apparently it works well.
Wondering what would happen if a parent told a kid: here are lits of bottles - get drunk, so you know when you start getting tipsy, then drunk, and what it feels like.
An alternative to risky campus life is a college with an honors system (students promise they wonât cheat, lie, steal⊠type of thing⊠or just that they can be trusted not to cheat ie., steam ideas&words which hopefully implies they wonât steal things either!)
Yep⊠So its not so ridiculous advice I guess. Donât shoot the messenger âŠwe all think it wonât happen to our âgoodâ kids. Well, most of these kids are good kids. Good kids sometimes do stupid things. 
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Yes they do! And mine donât seem to know that there are some things they donât need to come clean about, save these stories for another decade or two. ETA and not everything needs to be documented in photos.
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I am laughing so hard at this. Our daughter told us when sheâs 30 there is something she will tell us about her solo backpacking trip in South East Asia 
⊠Sheâs turning 27 this July⊠Lol
Come on folksâŠdonât all of you have something you did that your parents never knew about?
Now back to the topic.
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There are numerous studies on the myth that allowing kids to drink underage in the home somehow safeguards them in college. It is just not true. Just like itâs not true that the young in countries with lower drinking age have fewer issues with alcohol.
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This is pretty good. Also go over the school rules on any of this. Dorm rules.
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I started reading this thread, which seemed to be focused on students (especially young women) being at risk of becoming the victim of a criminal act by a stranger, especially at schools located in high crime inner cities. Not that there is no risk of such a thing happening, but the far, far greater risk to a young woman is date rape, and to both young men and women, of injury or death while intoxicated, whether by drugs or alcohol or both.
There are so many stories of intoxicated kids falling out of windows, or passing out in roadways and getting run over, or getting intoxicated and being raped.
The conversations about safety need to start in early high school or even middle school, before the kids start going to parties where there may be drugs and alcohol, and they need to continue right up through college, and even after college. The binge drinking habits picked up in college may not come to light until the young person has moved on from the residential college, and is now in the habit of driving home from the bar/party, inebriated.
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The big takeaway I saw was - people put themselves in these positions.
This girl, by herself, agreed to get in a car with a stranger - and thatâs scary.
I didnât expect the âfall off roofâ stories. Not that theyâre not valuable (they are), I just didnât realize these things happen.
All these kids leave to college for the time of their life and for anyone who loses a life (and their loved ones), it stinks and hopefully some of it can be avoided.
Yes, it seems it has to be ingrained early. Of course, hopefully kids take it seriously and donât âlaugh offâ their folks.