What a difficult dilemma - help!

Parents Forum
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<p>Monday night, we were at the banquet celebrating the 2006 county All-Star football team, to which Brandon was named. </p>

<p>The only award of the night was given to the Schlolar-Athlete . . . the All-Star player with the highest GPA. We were pretty sure Brandon had won it. </p>

<p>So we were surprised when his teammate from his school (who happens to be one of his best friends), along with another player from another school, were named as co-winners. </p>

<p>The gentleman who announced the winners said they had never had co-winners before, but these 2 guys had exactly the same GPAs.</p>

<p>I was happy for Brandon’s friend, but a little confused about it as well.</p>

<p>After the banquet, we congratulated Brandon’s friend and his parents. His father said that they were surprised their son had won at as well, since his GPA was lower than Brandon’s. </p>

<p>That was confirmed when we looked in the program and saw a full page picture of Brandon’s friend, named as the 2006 All-Star Scholar-Athlete, with his GPA published on the page as well. And his dad was right . . . his GPA is a full 10th of a point lower than Brandon’s. </p>

<p>I don’t know if I should say or do anything about this. That award is rightfully Brandon’s, but it’s one of his best friends whom he’d be usurping if anything is said. I tried to talk to Brandon after the banquet tonight, but he didn’t even want to talk at all. I don’t think he is angry about this, but he might be disappointed. </p>

<p>What would you do? The All-Star game is Wednesday night, and they could announce another co-winner of the Scholar-Athlete award at the game, I suppose, if we let anyone know about the error. </p>

<p>This is really hard . . . any help on this would be welcomed.</p>

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<p>It seems clear that they made a mistake, and I suggest letting them know. It’s not as if you’d be stealing an award from the other boys. If their gpa is under your S’s, then they didn’t earn the award that they got. </p>

<p>Considering that one of the players who won is your S’s best friend, surely that player, too, knows there was a mistake and wouldn’t want to keep an award that he erroneously got.</p>

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<p>Wow that is a difficult dilemma. Any chance his friends Dad might say something about it as he seems to realise it was a mistake?</p>

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<p>they don’t need to take away the awards, but they should include son…say there was an error and son should have been one of the top three</p>

<p>taking it away would be pointless really, but son does deserve to share</p>

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<p>Thanks, Northstarmom. I hadn’t been able to sleep tonight for thinking about this. </p>

<p>You’re right. </p>

<p>I guess I was really surprised that his friend’s father knew that his GPA was lower than Brandon’s and didn’t say anything. Apparently they knew about the award a couple of days ago. </p>

<p>Brandon has worked hard for his GPA. We shouldn’t let that award go by, especially since it would be a great supplement to his Notre Dame application. </p>

<p>Only thing I worry about is that if Brandon were to find out I said anything, he’d be pretty angry at me for interfering! Good thing he doesn’t read CC!</p>

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<p>I agree that you should say something but make it clear you don’t want to take away from the other 2 - just make sure Brandon gets an award that he has earned. Let us know how it all turns out. Good luck.</p>

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<p>"I guess I was really surprised that his friend’s father knew that his GPA was lower than Brandon’s and didn’t say anything. Apparently they knew about the award a couple of days ago. "</p>

<p>Assuming that Brandon’s friend also knew, I’m surprised that he didn’t say anything. If he knew and didn’t say anything, sadly, it doesn’t sound like he’s a real friend. That could be what your S is reacting to.</p>

<p>Years ago, I remember listening to a classmate compete in the local spelling bee, which was on the radio. The student who spelled before her asked for the definition of a word and was given the wrong definition. That student then msispelled the word. The student in my class told the judges that they had given the wrong definition, and they corrected the error by giving the other student another turn.</p>

<p>My classmate ended up not winning the bee, while the person whom she helped won the bee. Years later, I still remember my classmate’s name because I so admired how she made sure that her opponent wasn’t eliminated due to the judges’ error even though correcting that mistake lessened my classmate’s chance of winning.</p>

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<p>citygirlsmom, it’s really funny you mentioned the error thing. They announced tonight at the banquet that they had made an error by not including a full-page picture in the program of the other Scholar-Athlete from the other school </p>

<p>So now they have 2 errors on their hands! </p>

<p>Makes you wonder who was in charge of THAT award? lol</p>

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<p>You all are absolutely right.</p>

<p>I am calling the president of the All-Star Classic tomorrow, and will let you all know how it turns out.</p>

<p>I really appreciate the help thinking this through. Now I can sleep tonight!</p>

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<p>I look forward to hearing how it turns out. There is no reason to leave a mistake like this uncorrected.</p>

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<p>If the absolute criteria for the Scholar Athlete award is the football player with the highest GPA, then by all means, I would call someone (as everyone else has suggested). But, if the award selection has any “flexibility” on the part of the school, then it becomes trickier. Case in point…our local newspaper FINALLY desides to print all All Academic Team from the school district. They have two students from each grade, 5-12, with these students being selected by the schools. Our daughter, ranked first in class and the ONLY NMSF in the senior class is not named. When I politely asked for an explanation what I got was, “She’s gotten other awards and we like to SPREAD IT AROUND.” Yes, spread it around - to undeserving students who didn’t earn the recognition. I’m counting the days until graduation.</p>

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<p>If you have a competent GC, you might want to consider asking him/her to help, rather than making the call yourself.</p>

<p>Brandon will need the verification and support of the school if anything is to be done. Therefore, the All-Star Classic people will be talking to the school people in any event. </p>

<p>If someone from the school calls the All-Star Classic, and conveys a sense of urgency, the call could be viewed as significant, as something to attend to at once. If a parent calls the All-Star Classic, there is the possibility that the All-Star Classic people will feel less impelled to act quickly.</p>

<p>Finally, I know nothing about this award, obviously, but is it possible that the award, or the nomination for the award, is not based solely on current, cumulative GPA? If so, your GC could let you know that.</p>

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<p>I would double check the criteria for the award and make sure there isn’t some weighted vs unweighted gpa technicality involved. Then I would probably bring the error to the attention of your S’s coach and GC and let them contact the league president. Congrats to your S on his achievements.</p>

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<p>Maybe this is a good reason to let it go and not investigate.</p>

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<p>Let the GC of your school, know and report the gpa error. If there are other ciriteria or other technicality involved, ask her to find out. Mistakes are made. My son game in 12th at a state chess tournament and they left out his name. I did not interrupt the procedings, but did contact them afterwards, and sure enough, they had made a mistake.</p>

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<p>I agree with going through the guidance counselor and/or the coach. My first question would be what was the criteria? I’d want to find out if it was solely GPA or if there was discretion involved in who they could pick. If by solely GPA, then it is an error. If they could choose someone, there is nothing you can do. If the GC or coach tells you it goes by GPA itself, just say that you were wondering because if that is the case, your son’s GPA was higher than the winner’s GPA and ask if they would be willing to say something to the organization on your son’s behalf, not take away the awards of who already got them but at least add him if he had earned it and there was an error. As far as what to tell your son, you could say that you were just curious as to the criteria for that award and had called the GC and/or coach to inquire if it goes by GPA alone. Upon learning that it is by highest GPA (IF this is the actual case), you can say that once the GC or coach realized that your son’s was higher, they offered to call the organization and point it out. That way, you can show your son that you were not asking for him to get an award as much as you had called to find out the criteria as you were curious after the award came out and wasn’t what you had thought. IF other criteria were involved, no need to even tell son about your call. But if it is awarded just by GPA and the GC or coach is willing ot call the League, you can tell your son that once you found out the criteria and answer to your question, the GC/coach had thought it would be a good idea to let the organization know so that he could also be recognized (not take anything away from who got an award already). Focus on the fact that your call was more curiousity as to what the criteria for the award was and that one thing led to another once the GC/coach realized the error (if indeed there IS an error).</p>

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<p>Brandon’s mom I totally agree with the procedures that soozievt has suggested but with one difference: I would let your son know that you are simply going to check into the rules <em>before</em> you do it. Having gone through some things with my son, I was always straight with him and I felt it paid off with him always trusting me that I wouldn’t do anything behind his back.</p>

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<p>Well, here’s the latest update:</p>

<p>I contacted Brandon’s head coach. He told me that the GPA the guidance gave him for Brandon was not as high as what I told him. So he is going to investigate this and get back to me ASAP. </p>

<p>I have Brandon’s transcript in my hands and am looking at it right now. His cumulative weighted GPA at the end of his junior year is 4.175. His GPA for the first quarter of this year is a 4.43. </p>

<p>The GPA they published in the All-Star program for Brandon’s friend is a weighted GPA of 4.07. Brandon’s weighted cumulative GPA is definitely more than .10 higher. </p>

<p>Looks like his high school made the mistake! </p>

<p>I guess I should also clarify about Brandon . . . he get annoyed if I even ask him to come out of his room and say goodnight to us, so it’s nothing out of the ordinary for him to be angry with us!</p>

<p>I’ll let you all know what happens! Thanks for all the advice and interest.</p>

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<p>Do talk to the GC. They may look at a source other than the transcript in your hands. You don’t want the coach calling the guidance office and getting the same incorrect GPA when they look it up. I know this has happened before.</p>

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<p>ADad, soozievt, and cptofthehouse . . . thanks for the advice about the GC. I’ve emailed her to verify what she gave the head coach. </p>

<p>Interesting . . . I just looked up the email I sent her a couple of months ago to verify Brandon’s GPA and class rank at the end of junior year. The GPA she emailed me in response 2 months ago was exactly the same as is what is on his transcript.</p>