Which you shouldn’t. Saying that I responded to it does not really narrow it down based on my post count. 
@skieurope And then they inquire about freshman research opportunities.
Poster posts a specific question TWO years ago…and then posts multiple threads asking the same question…this month!
Really?
The posts where the kid hates school or life in general and complains about one thing or another which anyone with an ounce of sense could figure out how to solve - or complains about a very mild problem. And then keeps replying and whining and complaining now matter what anyone suggests. I absolutely HATE the word “snowflake”, but I have to admit that thought comes to mind when I read these posts - haven’t these kids experienced ups and downs in life before? I’m not talking about the kids who do have some legitimate problem, but the whiny ones get on my nerves.
I want, I want, I want. I’m not qualified, but I want…
Those can be symptoms of depression.
@bodangles Yes, they can be signs of depression , but that should be addressed by a physician and not a group of anonymous strangers on an Internet forum . We also see threads with exaggerated responses speaking of suicide as an attention seeking behavior. Mental illness needs to be addressed by mental health professionals. Not everyone who complains or whines is clinically depressed . Not our place to determine .
Ditto. Was going to say, but don’t want to single out any one poster, that there are often a lot of armchair healthcare providers in some threads, and that gets annoying. Health issues, learning disabilities, etc, should be properly evaluated and in context of the full picture and person’s history and presentation. Yes, sometimes it’s helpful to suggest a possible explanation for a constellation of symptoms or behaviors, but as Freud said, sometimes a cigar is just a cigar.
@carolinamom2boys I’m not saying to fix the person, I’m saying try to understand their mindset when responding to them. That’s well within posters’ capabilities.
When I posted freshman year about feeling overwhelmed and lonely, someone basically said, “Just feel happier! You’re creating your own problems, you freaking know-it-all.” I count that as among the least helpful and most callous things anyone has ever said to me. It made me feel even less like getting help for the issues. So I just didn’t.
@bodangles That is extremely unfortunate that someone said something to you that came across to you as unhelpful, critical or shaming.
But your experience is a perfect example of exactly the reason why it is a good idea to go to a professional for help. It’s also possible that whatever that poster said was not as critical as it came across. It’s hard enough to hear the “tone” of posts on the internet, and especially when people may be depressed or dysphoric or anxious or having adjustment issues or what have you, they may read a message with a critical perspective that was not intended by the poster. Just a thought. It is very common for that to happen. And sometimes posters mean well but how they write doesn’t come across that way. Hope you are feeling better.
But I think the point is more the Johnny one-notes. Their issues can come on many topics, from personal to parents and peers. Or classwork, major decisions, etc. The chronically distressed worry us, but it’s not something we can fix. Similar is kids who continually walk into the fire.
In contrast, I could name some kids who just needed a shoulder, a kind word, then their own strengths bring them more back on track.
I say this as a parent.
Posts where a college student is sad and self-doubting and angsty … and people respond in kind and caring ways … and the poster apparently never comes back to read them … leaving us to wonder what the venting was intended to accomplish … worrying if the poster may have committed suicide … or is perhaps fine and has gone blithely on his way.
In a word, ghosting.
I’d go so far as to say that any threads that mention suicide or mental illness should be immediately removed and the poster put in contact directly with a mental health professional.
One would think CC would be able to do that for people.
@MotherOfDragons This is done as long as someone flags the thread to a moderator. @skieurope @MaineLonghorn will comment.
Um, yeah. We can’t remove things we don’t notice. Believe it or not, we’re not omniscient. If someone reports a post like that, it will be removed.
Having a 20-year-old nephew who never threatened to but DID commit suicide, I take this matter very seriously and would expect that long-time members know that. When I get a report of someone mentioning suicidal thinking, I write them immediately and try to give them resources where he or she can get help.
Thank you for that, ML.
If you do a search of the main forum for “suicide” several threads pop up, some of which are alarming. It took me about 5 seconds to pull up several worrisome threads.
Like this one:
Where the poster writes
Then you have other posters requesting that we post a suicide hotline number, which seems entirely reasonable to me, but nothing happens.
I think it would be a VERY smart idea to have all those nifty filters you have at your disposal to flag the words “suicide” and other trigger words kids are using these days, and spend more time hunting down those posts and giving those people help.
It seems like a MUCH better use of the moderators’ time, I’m sure you’d agree.
Wow, it never occurred to me that flagging those worrisome posts would mean that the poster could be put in touch with help I’ll remember that in the future. Thank you!
I’m with @bjkmom – @MotherOfDragons 's idea is solid. Imagine how much nicer this site would be if cries for help were routinely addressed with real-life, helpful take-aways.
But since we’re talking about annoying threads I’ll throw this one out: Those newish poters with <15 comments who post something that’s obviously bait, and then we all rush to it (like, “I have a 4.0 and 34 ACT, will I get into any good school at all?”) and then the user is never heard from again. We fall for it all the time!
^^ not poters; posters.