What Cultural Traditions Are Part Of Your Household/Family?

Parent Cafe
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Inspired by @oldfort sharing her family’s tradition of food to feed new mom/parents after birth of a baby (I loved this tradition SO much!), it makes me wonder what other cultural traditions or perhaps “wives tales” does your household/family celebrate or implement?

It could be religious but I also am just thinking cultural traditions related to your family history/background.

I’ll start with one. My mom always taught us to bring a housewarming gift of a sack of flour and a sack of sugar - the flour necessary for bread, bringing warmth to a home and the sugar to represent the sweet things in life.

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Letting a cat over the threshold of the new house first before the humans when moving in - to bring good luck. We did it twice, actually. First time, with a cat we catsat. Her owner had no idea we would be moving while she was gone for a long vacation out of the country. We had no idea, too, but our offer was accepted, and closing happened a few days later just befire Christmas so we decided to move out of our month to month rental! We got the cat into her carrier and off we went! Let the cat in, and she went Houdini on us! :scream: We finally found her in the kitchen, in the cabinet under the sink (she was known for her ability to open kitchen cabinets :laughing:). Second time we moved, we had our own cats to perform the “blessing of the house.” Third time we moved, we let our cats over the threshold on the day we officially designated as our moving day, but we had owned the place for a few months and had been fixing it to bring to livable condition.

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When young, our kids didn’t want to go to early Mass on Ash Wednesday only to be imprinted with a black forehead and “gawked” at school.

And we didn’t want to deal with that, so we explained why Ash Wednesday was important and that it was a time of reflection. One of our very good friends was from New Orleans. (She was our cookie mom for Girl Scouts.)
She explained to me, when I was telling her the issue, that her family took advantage of the Mardi Gras theme and had a party for her kids. I thought it was a good idea, but I didn’t want to deal with the party on a Tuesday during a workday.

One day, after I picked up the kids from school, my kids were being really naughty, and the van was just full of loud noise.

I realized that it was Mardi Gras because the DJ announced it on the radio. So I stopped at the 7-Eleven, which was right down the street from our house, and told the kids:

“Today is Mardi Gras/Fat Tuesday and tomorrow we’re going to go to Mass. We’re here because you’re going to have one minute in 7-Eleven to get whatever you want. It’s the only time during the year that you’re going to be allowed to do this. Tomorrow I don’t want any complaints. Today you’re allowed to be naughty.”

Well the clerks were very familiar with my kids for the Slurpee’s. And I told him what we were doing. They had a timer and they put the timer on and they said: “go!”

That first year my kids only got one or two things because they were shocked.

The second and third year I had kids in the van who had been told by my kids that it was Mardi Gras and that their crazy mother was allowing them one minute to grab snacks at the 7-Eleven.

I had to call mothers and ask, “can your kids participate?” My son’s best friend has already spoken to his mom, and she was all for it because she was having the same problem. But for the other kids, the moms said no. But they got a big kick out of watching my kids unable to make up their minds in one minute.

It was a tradition even in high school. If the Slurpee machine was slow they were stuck. Now they just go to work and decorate their offices, bringing lots of carb snacks.

The funny thing is they have a good memory of it because it was so unexpected that it stuck with them and they loved it.

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LOVE this one. Lots of us raised Catholic or who raised Catholic kids can relate.

Boo on the moms who said no!

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I think they weren’t used to giving candy to their kids. I wasn’t either because I had orthodontic bills, but kids know what’s allowed. They’re not “gonna go extreme” on the candy until they’re in middle/high school.

But what I noticed with my own kids is they didn’t go to candy first, they went to drinks.

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Growing up I’ve always had and now make sure my kids have a small decorative evil eye to hang wherever they are. It’s cultural, not religious, kind of a superstition thing I guess? It’s to ward off negative thoughts. But they make a home/dorm feel complete to me. They’ve become very trendy now too :joy:

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2 things we do

When we have family Christmas (with more than just my immediate family) we play “find the pickle” and whichever “kid” finds it gets a cash prize. Sometimes we do it multiple times. I have know idea why or when this became a thing.

Now that the kids are older, we’ve taken to drinking “Christmas Cosmos” starting about noon on Christmas, once the presents are opened. We usually have our “fancy” meal on Christmas Eve, and then have something easy to prepare on Christmas. People always over indulge in chocolate and other junk on Christmas Day.

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Every year we have an 8 foot real Christmas tree flocked with ornaments collected throughout the years. Every year when the tree comes down, I search and search to get all of the ornaments. When I say I’m done the kids get to search and if they find a stray ornament they get a dollar. Every year I swear I found them all, but I don’t think there has been a single year where someone didn’t get a dollar :joy:

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Every year the ‘Easter Bunny’ leaves clues throughout the house (in poem format) that eventually lead to the candy-filled Easter basket.

We kept this going for a looong time,
lol.

D was away this year and the family she was staying with at Easter created clues for her and her friends after she told them about our tradition :yellow_heart:

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When my kids were growing up we did eight night of Hanukkah gifts with themes.

  1. Book and Pj night. They got multiple books ( often a series) and then new special pjs. For example, One year it was American girl doll pjs ( with matching for the doll). One year it was a set from a very expensive brand that all the kids at camp had, when college got close it was was sleep shirts with their college logo.

  2. Night at local hotel, swim in the pool, order pizza to the room. Present that was travel themed like a new suitcase or toiletries bag.

  3. Day at a museum with a visit to the gift shop to pick tjeur present.

  4. Fancy restaurant night. With new clothes for the evening out.

  5. Charity day. Engage in some activities like helping at food pantry or coming along for delivering meals on wheels. Given $118 dollars to choose who to donate to.

  6. Pick your present/ meal/ movie night at home. This was the night for their “big gift”. Sometimes they’d agree on the meal. Sometimes we’d have two different choices and watch two different movies.

  7. Family party night. Whole extended family would come. Girls would help decorate and choose menu which akeays included latkes.

  8. spa day and night. When they were young this was usually a bubble bath in my giant tub with those bath bombs and trying a new healthy recipe . As they got older we’d go for massages and a trip to Sephora. Then order dinner from the local salad place and play with all the new stuff.

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We always gave the kids each a gift on the Winter Solstice (usually a big Lego set) to have something new to play with on the school break before December 25. And there were no bedtimes on the longest night.

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Up until last year, we have our annual Easter egg hunt outside, the girls dye the eggs (last year had schedule issues). The kids are 21, 21, 23, 26 and 28. Everyone sleeps here on Christmas Eve., we have contests like cocktail making and play board games. I get the kids matching pajamas (never missed a year) which they still wear on Christmas Day hike. Most of the time Christmas dinner is Chinese food, but sometimes we switch it up. We lost our pickle ornament a few years ago, apparently it went out to the curb with the tree, fell off and got rained on, now it’s just silver and not the same.

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My mother gave all the grandchildren pajamas for xmas eve until they were in college, usually matching or coordinating even though they lived far from each other. This tradition started when I was growing up and we were allowed to open one gift on the 24th. Surprise, it was always new pajamas.

No grandchildren here, but if I ever have any I’ll continue the pajama tradition.

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My Oma (maternal grandmother) was born Christian and met my Opa at the end of WWI in Danzig (a free city between the WWs, now Gdansk in Poland. He was a Russian Jewish prisoner of war. She converted and they married. In 1939 they were extremely lucky (and Oma was extremely resourceful) to come to NTC with my late mom and aunt.

Oma must have been very homesick. Behind closed doors and curtains, she always had a big Christmas tree and we had many Christmas rituals, although I had absolutely no idea of the religious significance of the holiday until I went to Kindergarten.

Oma made plates for each family member with a big naval orange, a big apple, many walnuts, filberts, etc. wrapped individual pieces of candy, and, best of all, 10 pieces of decorative and delicious marzipan. Gifts were opened on Christmas Eve by everyone in strict age order. Oma was a deputy of Santa Clause and she had his permission for the Christmas Eve celebration.

Often there were matching PJs and of course egg nog. Oma, Opa and my aunt born in 1940 (surprise!) lived in an apartment building on the corner of West 140th St and Broadway in Manhattan.

These Christmases are my fondest childhood memories.

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I love that idea. How fun!

We always made a King Cake for both Epiphany and Mardi Gras, and sometimes in between as well. Anytime we had a group event or meeting during carnival season, our kids asked to take King Cake.

When our kids moved into their own apartments, I ordered King Cakes from Haydel’s, Gambino’s or Randazzo’s bakeries to be shipped to them. There was usually a scroll, some doubloons and beads included with the King Cake.

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We’ve had 5 weddings in my extended family last few years. We do a tea ceremony before the wedding. It is for the groom and bride to thank the bride’s parents/grandparents/uncles/aunts for raising the bride. They do it by kneeling and serving tea to the elders, and in turn they get a red envelope or present (jewelry) from those elders.
The groom and bride would do the same with the groom’s family.
Parents often get very emotional at the ceremony. My son-in-law’s father (a white guy) started crying at the ceremony.

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Every Christmas, we make julekake (Norwegian Christmas bread).

On Christmas Day at our house, you can stay in your pajamas all day long, even when sitting down to eat Christmas dinner. This applies to visitors/guests, too.

On Christmas Eve, we’d sprinkle glitter in the driveway and my kids would shout out “WE’RE READY, SANTA!” They did it for a few years after they stopped believing in Santa. That tradition is thanks to a preschool teacher. What’s the glitter for? That’s so the reindeer know where to land since none of the homes around here have chimneys (we’re in AZ). :slight_smile:

For Easter, the kids make a nest out of their clothes on their chair at the kitchen table and that’s where the Easter bunny leaves stuff. Hunting for eggs is in the backyard in your pajamas right after you wake up.

Around Dia De Los Muertos, we put out some photos & mementos of family members who have moved on/had a ‘change of address’. We are not Hispanic/Latino, but we live in the southwest and Dia De Los Muertos is a huge thing in the city where we lived for the 1st 12 years of D24’s life and we’ve found it to be a lovely way to remember our loved ones who are no longer with us. We usually light a couple of candles and set out all of the pictures & mementos in a makeshift ofrenda at home. And I usually watch Coco on Disney+. :slight_smile:

On Halloween, we get out all of our lightsabers and dress up as Jedi and camp out in the driveway to hand out candy and have lightsaber battles with kids who want to play. :smiley:

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I tried, last year, to order a King Cake from Costco N’Orleans, but they wouldn’t ship out to California.

This year, I forgot the cake and I asked the local bakery to make a “King Cake” and they forgot the baby that I brought.

Next year, I’ll order in advance from the one that ships in 24 hours.

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We always had indoor Easter Egg hunts (we lived in an apartment until kids were 4 and 2 years old).

We mostly gathered at my older sister’s home for Christmas Eve, complete with her H dressed as Santa, handing out a gift to each attendee.

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Christmas Eve, we always had something called Hay and Straw , for the baby born in the manger (it’s angel hair pasta, garlic, and cheese). My kids still do this in their own homes.

On the 4th of July, we read The Declaration of Independence – when they were old enough to help, we’d pass it around the table and take turns reading the next part.

My grandfathers were Canadian, which doesn’t lend itself to cultural demonstrations but I did learn how to make tortiere and yellow pea soup properly!

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