<p>There are derogatory terms for ethnic groups (was usign that as an example) that would be similarly offensive. Please think outside the box and extrapolate. You could fill in skin color or religion too if you prefer. Don’t use slurs. Nerd is not an offensive slur.</p>
<p>IP, moron is not a stiff upper lip term. How about calling the other child obtuse? A nice little play on words for a math nerd.</p>
<p>limabeans-
At my LAC (top 20 LAC, but not a strict secondary private school, though there were plenty of things that kids got away with at my s’s private school) you could set your clock by what time nightly this one guy would be dumped in the trashcan. I can still vision it,adn remember his name quite well. He is an attorney now.</p>
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<p>I have no idea what you are talking about. Moron has absolutely no racial or ethnic connotation. Yes, it is an insult. So is nerd. One use deserves the other. Your recommendation to turn the other cheek is appreciated but rejected. Though I am Indian, I am not exactly a follower of Mahatma Gandhi.</p>
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<p>It isn’t, but it is very effective and direct.</p>
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<p>That’s called the killer instinct.</p>
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<p>Look up Urban Dictionary. It is all about social misfits.</p>
<p>You guys are actually bonding over being combative… boys will be boys!
(Whatever works?!)</p>
<p>When I was a camp counselor we were clear with the kids that there was no name-calling. However, we allowed them to call each other fruits or vegetables. It was great to hear them yelling “you rutbaga” with a retort of “you brussel sprout”.</p>
<p>And I am sorry you do not understand my analogies, IP. To simplify, do not encourage your kid to use an offensive, derogatory, insulting term. Nerd does NOT fall into that categry. The others do.</p>
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<p>Nice try. My kids go to a british prep in Canada. The uniform, the manners (coincidentally they are also half Indian). I know this world: the little man you are describing would still be teased by his peers. </p>
<p>A lot of parents mould their kids to conform to what they think is appropriate for their middle age adult world…completely out of tune with their kids peer group.</p>
<p>Lets face it, you’ve raised a nerd.</p>
<p>Could “nerd” be one of those terms you can call yourself, but not want others to call you?</p>
<p>(Kinda like being in control of it and what it means and when it is used)</p>
<p>Overreacting is not a “killer instinct”. It is overreacting.
OK, enough head-banging for one afternoon. Back to the pain of real work.</p>
<p>BTW, I didnt say to turn the other cheek (though itis admirable), I said the response was an overreaction and out of line. Ok, carry on. As you were.</p>
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<p>Had to laugh… many eons ago (almost 30 years ago), when H was an undergrad doing research in the chem lab, he was asked to join an intramural softball league, made up of about 95% chem grad students. They self-named their team the Great White Nerds! They came in second in their league.</p>
<p>Kind of ironic, don’t you think?</p>
<p>and… I cross posted with performersmom and proved her point!</p>
<p>“mould”, yes British sp of “mold”</p>
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<p>I think it is perfectly OK to use an offensive, derogatory, insulting term when the situation calls for it. The nerd issue qualifies in my view. How many more times do I have to state that, and how many more times do you have to take the other side?</p>
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<p>The peer group in his school seems to be fine. All the kids are like that.</p>
<p>Like this quote:</p>
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<p>seems kind of appropriate for this thread.</p>
<p>I think we should leave IP’s son’s personal habits and demeanor out of this discussion. It makes me uncomfortable.</p>
<p>Slightly off topic, but are there actually British prep schools in the US?</p>
<p>Yes. Google British Schools of America.</p>