I’m going to withdraw to 9 colleges and I want to withdraw by “rejecting” them as they would a student.
The problem is, I haven’t gotten rejection letters yet so if someone could please post or copy a paragraph or even the whole letter of their rejection letter and tell me how it starts or something, I could parody that into a withdrawal statement for my colleges I will be withdrawing from.
<p>I’d be cautious with this… While some recipients might find your note amusing, others might think you a conceited smart-alec.</p>
<p>Even if you think you’ve found your college home for the next four years, don’t burn any bridges. What if you decided to transfer? Or apply for grad school?</p>
<p>Using humor in something like this is sort of like writing a funny admissions essay - you had better be very good at it, otherwise the humor will fall flat.</p>
<p>Dear John, I would like to be friends… It’s not you its me… oh, you meant from college.</p>
<p>Somewhere out there is a parody of a rejection letter, supposively from a student informing a college that he is unable to accept their rejection letter because he had recieved better rejections from other schools.</p>
<p>They just say “Thank you for applying. It has been a particularly difficult admissions process this year, and although you show solid potential, I regret to inform you that we cannot offer you a position this fall. Please be assured that your app was given a thorough review. <strong>more bull about how hard it was to pick people</strong> Best of luck.”</p>
<p>Something along those lines. Some schools [coughcough Princeton coughcough] send snottier rejections, but for the most part they try being somewhat friendly, which is what you should try to do as well.</p>
<p>Why would you do that? I don’t think it’s funny, i think it’s rude. I can’t think of any reason to be purposely rude. Even if you are never going to a particular school, you don’t need to insult the people who work there.</p>
<p>I wouldn’t go with the “I regret to inform you that I cannot at this time accept admission,” but maybe write a nice letter, end it with, “I’m sure that, despite this setback, your class will be filled with energetic and enthusiastic kids.” And put a little seal with your name.</p>
<p>I believe this is what you are looking for:</p>
<p>Dear College Applicant:</p>
<p>It is our pleasure to inform you that your application for admission has been enthusiastically rejected. This decision was unusually easy for our committee to make. We concluded that you are not smart enough, not interesting enough, and not attractive enough (we obtained a high school yearbook photo) to attend our institution of higher learning. </p>
<p>In addition to rejecting your application, we ask that you cease cheering for our athletic teams, stop wearing our licensed merchandise (including the boxers), and refrain from saying the name of our institution.</p>
<p>Please do not take this decision personally. We just don’t want you.</p>
<p>Why on earth would you want to send such a nasty letter, making fun of a college merely because they offered you admission? Most people in your position (getting in everywhere) would be happy and proud. With an attitude like that, I’m wondering who is luckier - you for getting in everywhere, or these colleges for not making your cut.</p>
<p>I really do not think you should send such a letter. You should be happy for the acceptance letter you received! Why be rude to a school that plenty of kids would be thrilled to attend? Be better than that.</p>
<p>The parody letter that some have referred to (posted on CC back in Dec) is this (it’s a student rejecting a rejection letter):</p>
<p>Dear Admissions Committee:
Having reviewed the many rejection letters I have received in the last few weeks, it is with great regret that I must inform you I am unable to accept your rejection at this time.
This year, after applying to a great many colleges and universities, I received an especially fine crop of rejection letters. Unfortunately, the number of rejections that I can accept is limited.
Each of my rejections was reviewed carefully and on an individual basis. Many factors were taken into account - the size of the institution, student-faculty ratio, location, reputation, costs and social atmosphere.
I am certain that most colleges I applied to are more than qualified to reject me. I am also sure that some mistakes were made in turning away some of these rejections. I can only hope they were few in number.
I am aware of the keen disappointment my decison may bring. Throughout my deliberations, I have kept in mind the time and effort it may have taken for you to reach your decision to reject me.
Keep in mind that at times it was necessary for me to reject even those letters of rejection that would normally have met my traditionally high standards.
I appreciate your having enough interest in me to reject my application. Let me take the opportunity to wish you well in what I am sure will be a successful academic year.
SEE YOU IN THE FALL!
Sincerely,
Paul Devlin
Applicant at Large</p>
<p>To actually reply to the original question, a typical rejection letter might talk about the many fine achievements of the applicant, the large number of applicants for a limited number of spaces, assurance that the applicant is destined for a fine future, and best wishes for success. There’s no standard formula, although just about every school tries to keep things fairly positive.</p>