What I learned in my year of unemployment

<p>In general, what you put into life is what you get out of life. People who in high school joined ECs and did nothing with those ECs except use them as resume dressing, and then in college did only what was necessary to get their degrees are the ones who afterward can’t find work.</p>

<p>They lack skills, contacts, and the kind of impressive experiences that one gets by working hard in some kind of ECs and by doing more than is required for classes. </p>

<p>To get work, they have to learn to do things that the students who followed their passions and interests have been doing since at least high school.</p>

<p>I like taxguy’s idea of a ‘non job’. But realize that it does take a certain amount of business savvy (of course), chutzpah, self confidence, and other intangibles. You also have to be able live with gaps in income , especially at teh start.For the 22 yr old, not that much of a problem. For me, a 50 yr old (and I know this is embarassingly off topic , probably) with a passion for my avocation, video editing, it is darn hard to support a family of five , including three kids, one in college , one next yr, and another in four yrs. doing video editing for people. Looks like back to the salt mines of the wages slaves , ie, a job, even if a fry cook.</p>

<p>On a previous posters question about networking, join your favorite political party (local, state or federal), even if not too political . there will be tons of contacts there. Join your church’s activities even if not too religious. Join EVERYTHING - you’ll get networked. We’re all human bros!</p>

<p>sort of like ‘The Yes Man’ movie.</p>

<p><a href=“http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uRv4CoXQoAQ[/url]”>http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uRv4CoXQoAQ&lt;/a&gt;&lt;/p&gt;

<p>i feel like there are some important details that i need to mention to make things more clear.</p>

<p>i did NOT study/work as hard as I could have. it’s hard to admit to myself because i know i’m not dumb and definitely have the potential. but with the exception of a few classes i genuinely loved, i tried to skate by on most of my other ones. i believe it’s a bad characteristic to have, to try to skate by on things you’re not interested in…because my role models were all people who gave their all even when there was no indication of an immediate payoff/benefit. i would like to become more like them. if you can, give it your all in college, and i mean in terms of BOTH working hard AND partying hard. live with 100% commitment. doing just one without the other leaves you unbalanced i feel…and if you’re gonna rock out all night at parties, then you better hit the books just as hard.</p>

<p>um, let’s see…i guess i should also post a little something about my actual job search process…because there are definitely GOOD ways of doing it and WRONG ways. I feel that a good general rule to follow is this: if it’s easy for you to do and doesn’t require much effort, it’s the wrong/easy way of looking for a job. Sending out resumes via email or internet is the worst method possible. If it’s easy for you to click SEND, it’s just as easy for them to hit DELETE.</p>

<p>When an employer is looking to fill a position, they prefer to hire someone that they KNOW or somebody who’s been vouched for by someone they trust. When a college grad is looking to fill a position, they prefer to just send a resume by email. you can see how there’s a clear difference in what each side considers the “safe/easy” method. The closer you as a college grad can get to becoming either the person they KNOW or somebody who’s been vouched for, the easier it will be to find a job. Which is why connections really honestly do work very well. I know some kids who got jobs because their dad’s co-worker’s brother was starting a hedge fund and needed econ/math majors. that’s like 4 degrees of separation. dad talks to the co-worker who talks to his brother who agrees to hire the kid. but it works. a lot better than clicking send on a computer.</p>

<p>also, another thing i learned this year was this: when you don’t stand for something, you’ll fall for anything. it’s a quote i heard and it kinda stuck with me. if people are not able to identify you, it makes it much harder to know what you’re looking for. if you’ve interned at magazine publishing companies all you’re life, ran the editorial section of your school newspapers, and started your own newsweekly about green technology in high school, it’s pretty clear not only to you but to those reading your resume where you stand. then there are those like me, without a clear goal, being a jack of all trades and working 4 unrelated internships throughout college. these kinds of kids will fall for anything and that’s really dangerous. nobody knows what you want and you yourself just end up wandering through life. that’s why i think the very first thing you should do is take out a sheet of paper, and write down all the things that interest you or don’t interest you, things other people have told you you were great at, and others that you weren’t…and be brutally honest. pretty soon, you should start forming a more cohesive picture of who YOU are.</p>

<p>imagine if you wanted to go to NYC from San Francisco but you don’t have money. because you have a CLEAR goal in mind, you will, one way or another, find your way to NYC. you’ll hitchhike, clean dishes to save up money, fly, sail, rollerblade, whatever…but you’ll get there one way or another. that’s what it’s like to have a goal. then you can start making SMART sacrifices and decisions. but if all you know is that you wanna leave SF, but you don’t know where it is you wanna go, you could end up in Wichita. or Topeka. and you’re still LOST. </p>

<p>i hate how my posts are so long and ramble on and i apologize for making them so long. it’s just that i wish someone was there to tell me all this 4 years ago, and i feel like adults in general do a **** poor job explaining the situation in a way kids can understand.</p>

<p>Agreed with biglawhopes and northstarmom. </p>

<p>All this stuff is obviously useful, otherwise, why would people do it? (And no, don’t do things you hate to look good. You don’t want a career in something you hate.)</p>

<p>quick question, sled: are u now employed? Was unsure whether you were taking stock in yr 1 of N yrs off or whether it took you <em>A WHOLE YEAR</em> to get a job, and here are my lessons learned.</p>

<p>“i feel like adults in general do a poor job explaining the situation in a way kids can understand.”</p>

<p>I feel that adults do a lot of explaining, but in general, young people ignore what adults say because young people think adults know better. This even was true when I was young. Many if not most people need to learn life’s lessons the hard way – through the experience gained by messing up.</p>

<p>Still, I appreciate your taking the time to start this thread and to share your experience. Maybe your posts will help some students avoid making the mistakes you made.</p>

<p>“And no, don’t do things you hate to look good. You don’t want a career in something you hate.”</p>

<p>This might temper previous poster taxguy’s advice to college students to majoring in actuarial science, accting and those other usual suspects. If you do not like this bag of things, not good to do it (recall bartleby the scrivener+, walter mitty++ a 100 yrs later, and thoreau’s statment about living a life of quiet desperation). taxguy did follow up with attending to your passion.</p>

<p>And OP’s last post declared the value of being ENGAGED (giving it your all, no matter how ‘trivial’ ). One necessarily is engaged about which one is passionate. It is sort of like the ‘quality’ concept found in ‘Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance’ (wherein, even the tedious adjustments of fine tuning the bike takes on a super important status, almost a oneness with the task). Whether it is volunteering or doing your fry cook job, people will notice if done with passion+++</p>

<p>[Zen</a> and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia](<a href=“http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Zen_and_the_Art_of_Motorcycle_Maintenance]Zen”>Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance - Wikipedia)</p>

<p>To resonate with OP latest post, also, when one is doing what one is passionate about, people WILL notice you.</p>

<p>+
<a href=“http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bartleby,_the_Scrivener[/url]”>http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bartleby,_the_Scrivener&lt;/a&gt;&lt;/p&gt;

<p>++
<a href=“http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Walter_Mitty[/url]”>http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Walter_Mitty&lt;/a&gt;&lt;/p&gt;

<p>+++
<a href=“http://spongebob.wikia.com/wiki/SpongeBob_SquarePants_(character)[/url]”>http://spongebob.wikia.com/wiki/SpongeBob_SquarePants_(character)&lt;/a&gt;
:)</p>

<p>quick note here: the guy who created S Bob was a college educated marine biologist who doodled and liked art on the side. He combined both his passions into this cottage industry.</p>

<p>OP, if you missed the message to party less and work harder, and have goal in mind, then I really think you CAN’T have been listening to the adults in your life (parents, teachers, counselors, professors). Blaming the adults for “not explaining it” is silly.</p>

<p>unfortunately it takes maturity and wisdom to truly understand and appreciate the advice you hear from adults throughout your life. I don’t think the op’s intent in creating this thread was to bash adults for not emphasising what he’s learnt but rather to share his experience of wisdom of maturity to all of us here which a lot of us has found useful. The tone of your reply is unecessary. But then again you have “parent” as part of your username.</p>

<p>Sledfish, you are a bright, articulate person who has fallen victim to the mythology of our times (go to a great school - all will take care of itself) colliding with a new economic reality in America. You seem uncommonly able to be objective about your situation and disinclined to look for someone else to blame - these qualities lead me to wonder if you have any interest in writing a book about your experiences to help the next group of kids entering college and considering taking on substantial debt to do it. I would buy such a book for my high school students because the lessons you’ve learned, and continue to learn, are so much more effective coming from you - a stranger they’ve never met - than from me - the parent who can’t possibly know as much as they think they do.</p>

<p>Bright, creative people do make lemonade from lemons - check out the product line at despair.com. Company started by individuals downsized out of their corporate jobs. Saw them profiled on some TV show - their “demotivational” posters, T-shirts etc. are hilarious, and proof that American capitalism can triumph in the face of adversity. You will find your way - your honesty about yourself is an excellent quality and very refreshing in comparison to others who want to blame everyone else for their problems. Good luck to you in finding the best way to capitalize on your strenths.</p>

<p>For those who are currently unemployed and fresh out of college, now might be the time for some public service work (Americorps, Vista, Peace Corps, military…) </p>

<p>And a college degree from a legitimate institution is not a waste! You might need to start at the bottom in a field that you are not passionate about, but it is a start. You will at least learn more about what you don’t want to do.</p>

<p>roderick notes, " If you do not like this bag of things, not good to do it (recall bartleby the scrivener+, walter mitty++ a 100 yrs later, and thoreau’s statment about living a life of quiet desperation). taxguy did follow up with attending to your passion."</p>

<p>Response: I never noted that folks should do what they hate. However, I would like to suggest that you don’t need to love or even be passionate about what you do in order to avoid “quiet desperation.” You just shouldn’t hate what you are doing and should certainly have an avid love or desire for making money!</p>

<p>In summary, my mom used to always say that you can be just as happy or even unhappy being middle class or even rich;however, you will almost always be happier being rich over having to struggle each day over money.</p>

<p>taxguy, thanks for the elaboration. It is actually closer to what I wanted to say: There should be a ‘real comfort level’ in what you are doing as you kinda of shoot for the friction pt between the accelerator and the clutch , to use a manual transmission analogy, between finding and doing ‘your bliss’ and doing something that makes enough money to suppport nice things in life, like a spouse and kids- kids are pretty cool, as all of us parents can attest. Helping them get to college us also sort of like the piece d’ resistance, too in their upbringing. And it DOES take dough to do this.</p>

<p>I did the reverse of what taxguy advised (major in money, minor in LAS), majored in philosophy and psychology, then minored in math-compsci, and lived nicely off of computer programming for 26 years. But there is a natural fit with what I learned in philosophy and with computer programming. i love it, got into it, and there is, in short , a comfort level there. As I posted previously, even now, I can still ply my wares with the programming expertise I have gleaned over the years , but I have to move to cleaveland, or not see my familiy 5or 6 days out of the week, and I am figuring this out (that is , the work is there). Actually, I believe something will open up in chicago, too. Someone’s got to retire or whatever…</p>

<p>Right now, in this economic climate, I see full blown engineers and ones who ‘majored in money’ of my same age who never looked at a philosophy text in the same unemployment line as I am. USA is competing with china and bombay where they can do things cheaper. yes, Mr Reagan, the wall did go down, and so did the status quo of the USA as vendor of Everything.</p>

<p>What was that deal, taxguy, zipit? whre is your zipcode?</p>

<p>+
<a href=“http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Joseph_Campbell[/url]”>http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Joseph_Campbell&lt;/a&gt;
<a href=“New Edition of Alan Watts Book Points to Campbell's Influence - Joseph Campbell Foundation”>New Edition of Alan Watts Book Points to Campbell's Influence - Joseph Campbell Foundation;
<a href=“http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kYR18yGIaiA&feature=PlayList&p=91FE3ABF1F21FF49&playnext_from=PL&playnext=1&index=4[/url]”>http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kYR18yGIaiA&feature=PlayList&p=91FE3ABF1F21FF49&playnext_from=PL&playnext=1&index=4&lt;/a&gt;&lt;/p&gt;

<p>I strongly agree with OP. I also feel only top 5% of a class do what “biglawhopes” does. Atleast 60% of the class do not become organized. I do not agree with “intparent”. But again he/she is a parent and told their kids and the world the right things to do. Northstarmom, Roderick, bchan1 and raison_d’etre hit the nail on the head. 90% of the time kids tune out of what adults- parents or teachers say. No matter what we say or how we say it does not help- we are lecturing!!! Some kids can be late to school and someone may not do homework regularly. They will still not sleep early, they do not watch their time previous night, they may get on facebook and may run out of time to finish homework. The same kids fall behind in grades or simply feel they do not have to maintain a planner because it is not cool. They will be O.K. they will wing it. They feel their GPA combined 3 years of high school weighted is 3.45, they are only .3 off from the better kid, no big deal. There is always an explanation why their resume does not look better, if they prepare a resume at all. They can feel it in their bones that they will be O.K. just by winging it………… When they are ready to get a job they will find 59 others who did the exact same thing and now they cannot stand out from their brothers and sisters. Whatever race or skin color they may be, to the employers they all look the same. How can they pick one over the other? Should the employers draw a resume from the basket? But the feeling that they will be O.K. no matter what they do is the essence of youth. There are classes offered and taught in subjects ranging from A – Z in higher learning institutions. But there are no lessons offered for the most important things in life- how to raise kids or how to cope up in a difficult relationship or how to cope up with being the oddball in school. Extreme cases- there were repeated shootings in schools in various decades when the individuals felt they did not belong to the system. We do not want to go to counseling or go to a shrink (who can afford it?) for normal things that everyone seems to be pulling off. Some of us may not go to church, as not all of us are Christians. So the counsel from the minister from behind the curtain is not available (honestly I do not trust the person behind the curtain with my emotions or my boys). You can say there are teachers in school to help. The trick is most of us are not aware we need help badly. We are not aware if we do not seek help, regrettable things would happen. Also if someone creates a rumor or a thought that a particular kid or adult is weird, 90% of the kids and adults buy it. So kids or adults try not seek help. They try to look cool and hope things would get better. I do not think OPs posts are long he/she is reaching out to the young adults, which is applaudable. Many of us, kids or adults are not necessarily bad people or losers, we need nurturing and many times parents and teachers are not enough. A more systematic and friendly forums should exist in high schools and colleges where they are required to attend a seminar or visual presentation of what will happen if you do not do this and this by this month of the year. 60% of the population would eventually appreciate it. If you guys tell me that’s why there are career centers I would laugh at you because many times I walked in there in 2 different public universities and they look more help less than me to help me. Go to a government employment agency the folks who work there look listless. They log into their computers and if you are lucky will print 2/3 jobs and you feel why you even stepped into that lack luster office. My husband says he gets ahead in life only because 90% are clue less and are letting him get ahead. May be he is like” biglawhopes”. It used to be that the US was a dream land where there were plenty of opportunities if only you are willing to roll up your sleeves and work. But as they, the corporate management, moved manufacturing out of the country many might be left standing outside those empty buildings hoping that doors would open again to good life. I am not saying to nurture inefficiency and poor quality products by “protecting the industry” or with socialism. If the problem is poor management and labor unions fix it but do not take jobs away. We can all live with a little bit less dividend income. We need laws to curtail involuntary corporate takeovers ruining lives of may families. Those of us with a comfortable life style(like me who can type this in the middle of the day) need to act to help others. I am a parent who joined CC to advise S to pick a good school.
It does not matter what stage of life OP is at now. OP feels like helping people that’s what matters. This form College Confidential (CC) is doing what I expect an educational or a social institution should be doing. Sometimes I feel I should move into an Amish society and live happily ever after, unfortunately I cannot live such a strict and frugal life but the idea of an ideal society is very romantic. The needy gets help from those who can help. May be we at CC can create this virtual Amish village.</p>

<p>the knee jerk response people have to those who want to make a lot of money that “money isn’t everything”…this is true but having room with money provides a lot of comfort and stability to a person’s life. No one should ever feel greedy or shallow-minded if they want to pursue a career because one of the reasons is that it pays well. It becomes a problem when money is the ONLY reason. </p>

<p>Like taxguy said, if you are just starting to seriously think about what you want to do in college, try to pick a major that you not only are passionate about, but also something that is practical and useful to society. That way you can be financially secure while enjoying what you do.</p>

<p>Roderick, yes you can thank Congress for the loss of many jobs to Mexico, China and India. Moreover,with this new Health Care Reform, the “sucking sound” that occured out of the US will become a Hurricane. It is too bad that Congress doesn’t understand that we don’t live in a vacuum. There are plenty of competitive countries that would love corporations to open up manufacturing and other offices. Every time we pass anti-business legislation by raising minimum wages, mandatory benefits for employees, easier litigation etc, we encourage companies to leave the US for cheaper pastures. We are truly legislating ourselves out of existance.</p>

<p>Rockies, don’t you believe in paragraphs? You have one huge run-on post.</p>

<p>

</p>

<p>Was this adressed to me? </p>

<p>Menial tasks have to be done, and almost no one loves them. But I mean in the broadest sense that if you despise math, don’t major in engineering, because you won’t even be able to do/accomplish more than the menial tasks, and will hate the work above it- and will probably not get hired. Do menial tasks to build up on the career ladder of things you do love. Companies, believe it or not, want you to show some modicum of interest in your potential career, or job. </p>

<p>There’s another great book From B.A. to Payday that covers case examples like this- a boy whose dad connected him with Investment banking interviews that he was bored/unenthused at because his true passion/internships/skills lay in entertainment. He gave up IB career hopes and became an Entertainment lawyer, which suited his interests. Once he figured out why he wasn’t getting the banking jobs (he didn’t really want them, and it was obvious) he got into a field he did want to be in, and did much better.</p>

<p>'People aren’t going to want to get to know you if it just seems that you want to use them as a contact.</p>

<p>The alum, people at job fairs have no reason to keep in touch with you since it seems that you only are trying to leech off them.'</p>

<p>How am I trying to use them? I never directly asked for a job. I just asked them for advice about a career in engineering, what kinds of things certain engineers do in their jobs, etc. I make sure to never ask them directly for a job. Hell, one time I even saw some students ask questions like ‘are there any openings in your department?’ and the recruiter smiled and looked willing to help. When I tried just asking him for more details about the work done at his company, he didn’t even want to look at me.</p>

<p>As for the idea of joining clubs/orgs, that would’ve been a good idea but I’m now out of school…</p>

<p>“How am I trying to use them? I never directly asked for a job. I just asked them for advice about a career in engineering, what kinds of things certain engineers do in their jobs, etc. As for the idea of joining clubs/orgs, that would’ve been a good idea but I’m now out of school…”</p>

<p>There are many clubs/organizations for people out of school. In fact, most successful people are involved in several organizations, and often in addition to being executives at work are heading local social, political, charitable, religious, etc. groups.</p>

<p>Join organizations related to your profession or prospective profession, your favorite political party or cause, join your local alumni club and help with fundraisers, planning social events, interviewing students and other things the club does. Become a booster for your favorite sports team, become active in a church or spiritual/religious organization/ etc. Volunteer with nonprofits, mentor kids at local school, etc.</p>

<p>I don’t know why the one person you’re referring to at a job fair didn’t want to talk to you, but maybe your questions were too simplistic or you lacked a background in the field so the recruiter felt he was wasting his time. The other possibility is that you caught him at a bad time or you misinterpreted his behavior.</p>

<p>well I don’t know why he was so rude. All I know is that my networking skills are pretty bad or the alumni at my school just don’t like to help out much. I’ve emailed maybe 50 or so of them, and got 2 phone interviews as a result. After exchanging a few emails with certain alumni, they usually stop responding. However, I have called a few of them, and one of them really liked talking with me as we talked on the phone for over an hour with him doing most of the talking. I thought calling them would be more awkward, but maybe thats what I need to do?</p>

<p>However, on linkedin, I’ve been asked the same questions to people who respond to the questions I post in the discussion forums, and quite a few of them continued to follow up with me and we exchanged emails for weeks. I never directly got an interview out of it, but I appreciated the fact that they took more time to answer my questions in detail and offer the best advice they could.</p>