<p>^ Only by your personal definition (or definition used in your social world). Which is a valid point and partly what I was asking in the OP. </p>
<p>But I think you are equating ‘getting good grades’ with ‘being smart’ or ‘being intellectual’ I think these are entirely different things and only somewhat related. Its a highschool sort of mentality that is actually inaccurate. I see tons of high scoring kids that are neither particularly sharp nor at all intellectual, and likewise I know plenty of intellectuals (including many current professors at top universities) who always valued learning for its own sake far more than grades. </p>
<p>I was making a point that in the social world I’m familiar with, the self-labelled nerds (and I’m not talking about kids you know who who get a 4.0 who say it as a joke) are ones that are proud to be nerds, very happy and social with their little circle even though they fit the stereotype to a degree that you describe (and they know it and like it). I am pretty sure you and I are talking about the same type of kids, but what I was saying was that said nerds in the world I live in (e.g. in the region we live, at the schools they attend), they are not insulted by the label, they are fortunately not at all picked on for being nerds, and they are not aspiring to be popular or part of some other highschool tribe. I swear to god they like being nerds. </p>
<p>But I completely appreciate and value that in your experience, where you live at the schools you are familiar with, it is more like the article describes. </p>
<p>Could it be that in your circle of friends, you look down upon nerds and see the label as an insult, but the nerds themselves are clueless about it? So then maybe we aren’t talking about regional or highschool differences, but simply how one views ‘nerds’ based on where one sits in the social hierarchy at school?</p>
<p>Oh, yea, I think that makes a little more sense now. Certainly there are people who have an intrinsic interest for learning and those who don’t care much for it, although they may still be intelligent and achievement motivated. I’ve noticed that a lot with doctors, actually. Some of them seem like the sort of guys who go home and read science books into the night, where others are more likely to be found cruising the streets in their convertible and attending parties at those hours. Obviously, because they’re doctors, we can assume both types are motivated and intelligent, but it’s their personalities that differ. </p>
<p>I guess my take on it was that a point of social ineptness, sexual inactivity and (in some cases) eccentricity is a place where very few people would want to be. More often that not, I think someone is sequestered into that spot as opposed to choosing to be there. At least, that’s how it was for me. Granted, I never took an interest in drinking or sex just for the sake of doing it, but I couldn’t help but feel like those doors have been closed off to me in high-school regardless of my interest (or lack thereof) in taking part. So, in response to your question, I don’t think I’m a jock (or whatever) looking down on nerds, no. </p>
<p>It’s possible that, due to the school I attend(ed) where the jock-mentality was very strong, I suffered under the pressure of trying to act out my inner nerd and stay in line with the peer group’s social norms–a sort of “nerd’s guilt”, if you will. More likely. though, I probably just never found a group of, like you say, “intellectuals” who shared my interest in discussing Nietzsche over LeBron or Hans Zimmer over Katy Perry. Maybe, I just didn’t try hard enough, I don’t know. Hopefully, things will get better in college.</p>
<p>Shamefully, I will admit that I’ve spent many a lunch hour sitting alone and I don’t see any reason why being labelled a “nerd” could be a good thing in such a situation.</p>
<p>^ I’m sorry to hear that! Ugh, it brings back memories of a generation ago for me. </p>
<p>I’m pretty confident college will likely be very positively different for you. As a general rule it seems all those strong divisions between “highschool tribes” seemed to blur or disappear in college. Some of it is developmental maturity, some is the fact that there are just so many more people to choose from to find your crowd (and not even be able to notice ‘another crowd’ to compare to), and also because kids self-select to go to college and self-select to particular ones. It’s all so different when no one is vying for social place or grappling so much with ‘who am I?’, and you can just ‘find your people’ and getting to just be whoever you really find yourself being.</p>