<p>Parents, this is something I’d kind of like to have an idea of. If you have kids in HS now (which I assume is the case with most) or did, what restrictions did you have with their wardrobes?</p>
<p>Did you, for example, prohibit torn/torn-looking/destroyed jeans? “Overly fitted” tops, maybe certain things that went against your aesthetic judgment? Would you not let your kids wear something just because you didn’t like it? Or did it not matter as long as they paid for it all?</p>
<p>And any reasons for not allowing certain things?</p>
<p>Fortunately, my kids are all pretty modest, especially before they went to college so there was never an outfit that I didn’t like. Now that my oldest is 25, she does tend to wear more low cut top’s but that’s about it. My son’s and their friends don’t wear the droopy jeans so no problems there either. I think I’m just lucky!</p>
<p>My kids are both pretty conservative dressers, so I’ll have to answer this hypothetically:</p>
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<p>No, assuming they got that way after years of being worn. There’s no way I’d pay for new ones that looked like that, but if either of my kids had wanted to waste their hard-earned money on them, that would be their business. </p>
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<p>It would depend on why I didn’t like it. If I simply didn’t think it looked good on them, that’s one thing, but I would probably have drawn the line at overly-revealing clothing for D, or super-baggy pants on S. It would also depend on the occasion: if they wanted to go to school looking messy that was their call; not so for, say, Thanksgiving dinner.</p>
<p>We always told our kids that as long as their grades were great they could pretty much wear what they wanted, color their hair whatever, and they could pierce anything they wanted (no tattoos though…figured piercings would grow shut if removed).</p>
<p>Luckily we don’t have 4.0 students!! That just saved me the week before school started when my daughter pierced her own nose one night. I didn’t get mad, I just reminded her of the rule and the poor grade she got in lit last semester.</p>
<p>Plus in our case, they don’t get a large allowance so we buy all the clothes - makes it very easy to say no to things I didn’t like.</p>
<p>My oldest is built like me- slight but very buxom- clothes that her friends could wear, looked more risque on her. However, she wore mostly baggy tshirts in high school ( unlike me, who wore cropped tops )
We was looking at a private girls high school at one point - and they didn’t allow jeans with any sort of holes in them.
She worked with horses, most of her jeans * had holes* in them & we were not about to buy a new wardrobe.</p>
<p>She stayed at her secular private prep school.</p>
<p>Younger daughter has always had a bit more fashionable but still appropriate taste even though her jeans are so tight that I couldn’t wear them if I wanted to!</p>
<p>( I have noticed I am pleased to say that no matter how hot it was or how her friends are dressed,( according to lots of pics I have seen) she always wore a bra & this is someone who could get away without wearing one for the most part)</p>
<p>I haven’t ever had make her change clothes- I am just happy she wears them.</p>
<p>I also don’t mind ripped up jeans- I go to clubs to hear live music fairly often & I like to blend in with the 30 somethings so I ripped up a pair of my own jeans just for a little change. It was pretty fun!</p>
<p>Really only two rules: Whatever it is has to be clean and can’t smell. (If you’ve got athletically inclined teenage boys you know waht I mean). And no t-shirts in questionable taste,. i.e promoting (or even kidding about promoting) violence, drug use, random sex, or with profanity. Aside from that its up to them. And as they became interested in girls they dressed and groomed better when they realized that you catch more flies with honey.</p>
<p>My parents have always had the “absolutely no holes in jeans” rule. My mom throws them out once they get holes, which is a giant waste of money, imo, but it’s not my money.</p>
<p>When I was in 8th or 9th grade outfits my parents found too revealing were just what everyone was wearing then, I just happen to be fairly curvaceous. I quickly learned that instead of arguing with them I could just bring the outfit with me and change at school.</p>
<p>Our girls are required to wear appropriate clothes. We buy all of their clothes, even now at 21 and 16. When they are out with our friends, they are expected to wear parents apprpriate clothing. When going out to dinner (or anywhere public with us) they know what to wear or not to wear(no sweat shirt or pants). When going to school, no low cuts, short dresses or cut up jeans. We don’t really care what they wear when they are with their friends. D1 will generally ask what to pack before she comes home from college. H is known to say - are you going to walk out looking like that?</p>
<p>My pet peeves - no tommy or thongs showing.</p>
<p>So far, we have never had any arguments about clothing. I admire both kids’ taste in clothes and they, as D says, have a self-image to uphold. They like looking good and buy mostly classics which look great on them. It would be hard to start picking their clothes now, since we’ve let them dress themselves since before they started pre-school. It saved a LOT of fights and tears, as well as $$$. Happily, my kids also like our taste in clothing (except hubby’s Roman sandals, which fortunately have fallen apart).</p>
<p>S1’s tastes run to witty and/or free t-shirts he gets from competitions, activities, etc. Jeans tend to be a big baggy, but that’s because he’s very, very slim. Looks good in a kilt. Cleans up very nicely when he wears his suit or blazer. </p>
<p>S2 cares a bit more about clothes, but is not preppy or into name brands.</p>
<p>I have never vetoed their choice of clothing, though I have bitten my tongue occasionally. I do not have to remind them when it’s appropriate to dress up. Clothing is not a battleground here, fortunately. It’s a form of personal expression and not something I wish to control.</p>
<p>I have never really said much about clothes. Learned not to decades when my Dad forbade my brother from buying a military jacket (all the rage at the time). I can still remember hearing the tinkling of bells coming down the front path and opening the front door and seeing him wearing the long gold tunic and bells and beads he bought instead.</p>
<p>D wore a uniform from K through HS. Her clothes have always had to be “Dad” approved. Fashion shows always occurred after all shopping trips. H is pretty modern in his thinking and as long as not too much cleavage shows, he’s good to go. D actually looks forward to doing her best fashion model routine for H. Is Project Runway missing a very short model?!</p>
<p>As far as college goes, there is only one restriction. We bought her one wardrobe for every possible occasion. If she wants more or needs more, it’s all on her. That’s one of the perks of being an adult and having your own hard earned money. The ability to spend or not to spend. I do know that she and her older sister are planning a club clothing shopping trip before she goes back for her second year. Dad will not get a vote anymore.</p>
<p>We went to someone’s parents 80th birthday. It was understood to be a fairly dressy affair. One family showed up with both parents dressed appropriately, their 2 teenage sons showed up with wife beater white t-shirts, jeans and sneakers. It was clear that the parents bit their tongues.</p>
<p>Not having daughters there was a certain things I never had to worry about. D2 was always pretty conservative although there was one time I did bleach his hair and put red on the tips, that lasted a short while and nothing else weird ever came up. D1 on the other had liked to push the envelope some so my basic rules were no skulls, spikes or profanity on clothing or tattoos and no piercings until he was 18. Other than that I pretty much let whatever happen happen. I think “funny” clothing or hair is a safe way to rebel and a good way for kids to express themselves. When my edgy kid was 18 he got two piercings (both in his ear) after about a month he let them grow back and has yet to get a tattoo. I am always reminded of a kid my boys went to school with who had a great desire to be VERY edgy. He father said absolutely not. I think the dad wanted a jock and he got a very different type of son. Now that the son is on his own he is the most extreme kid I know. I often wonder if the father had let the kid do the “weird” stuff when he was younger if he would be a bit more conventional now.</p>
<p>I didn’t really have limits, except for requiring them to follow the rules of wherever they were going (no open shoes on chem lab days, etc.).</p>
<p>My son went through the offensive T-shirt stage. He was required to wear his shirt inside out at school to obscure the text a few times, and he got sent home from his part-time job once for wearing an offensive shirt. One hopes he learned something.</p>
<p>My daughter dressed very conservatively in high school. This disappointed my husband. His mental picture of being a father of a daughter included scenes where Dad would have to say, “You’re not going out dressed like that!” But he ended up with a daughter who has never worn a less-than-tasteful garment in her life (except for one occasion when she dressed up as a slut for Halloween).</p>
<p>That reminds me of the Halloween dress up day for the pet shop employees. I have a fairly strict dress code that specifically says no cleavage. But for Halloween, I encouraged everyone to come to work in costume … I have a dressy velvet witch costume that I wear on Halloween …</p>
<p>Each of the girls came to me privately and explained their costumes and asked permission for cleavage! It was fine … it was <em>costumes</em> and one day only. But it was cute!</p>
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