What now? Daughter needs now plan for gap year.

Parent Cafe
1

<p>My daughter, until yesterday, was an internationally competitive ice dancer. She is nineteen, was accepted to her dream school for this fall, but deferred for a year so she could continue to compete. Unfortunately, her coach’s unexpected and escalating emotional abuse has caused her to terminate that relationship. She did so with incredible courage and dignity, and I cannot tell you how proud I am of her.</p>

<p>She and her partner are taking the next few days to decide whether to continue with the season or not. They would need to find a new coach, and most likely relocate, for at least a part of the week. Neither is particularly interested in that scenario, (especially her partner, who is recently married). They would also need the support of their federation in order to retain their competition assignments, with their first scheduled event in a couple of weeks. New coach, new technique, possible new programs, start of the new season looming large–I think it is unlikely they will be able to continue. </p>

<p>My daughter is in shock right now. She began skating at the age of five, and by the age of nine was already training as a serious competitor. Until yesterday, she was training 30+ hours a week and traveling extensively for training and competition. It was her passion and her life. At the same time, she managed to be an exemplary student (homeschooled). She had great SATs, was awarded a National Merit Scholarship, and was accepted at some of the top schools in the country.</p>

<p>My husband and I want to give our daughter some time to reorient herself, but we know she will need to find something to do until she is able to enter school in the fall. She is bright, hardworking, proficient in Latin and French, has some Russian, and an interest in international relations. She is also a devout Catholic and volunteers in our parish. Her main academic interests, in addition to languages, are literature, philosophy, and theology.</p>

<p>We would like to encourage her to find something to do that would help her to advance her academic or career interests and look to the future with hope and enthusiasm. Because she is unaffiliated with an institution right now, I am not sure where she should look for academic programs or internships. My husband and I have some contacts we can refer her to, but we think she will need to look farther afield. </p>

<p>I would be very grateful for any ideas or referrals to websites or other resources any of you may have. Thank you in advance for your help!</p>

2

<p>Wow…that was a very courageous move on your daughters end. Her situation is not similar to anything I could think of other than the kid who goes through four years of college only to find that he/she could not get into the grad program or professional program that they always believed they would. Young adults need to shift gears sometimes so I guess that is what your daughter will need to do right now. Does your daughter want to pursue a degree at this time or is her passion and desire to continue to skate? I guess that is what she really needs to decide and once that is figured out than she could decide on her next step. It sounds like she was planning to attend school next year, so does that mean that she was willing to put her skating career on hold? If so it sounds like the decision she just made was her way of putting her sport behind her and that she may want to really move on.</p>

<p>Wishing your daughter lots of luck…she sounds like a terrific young lady.</p>

3

<p>If she deferred, you may want to check into the situation in regard to her taking classes during the deferral year - may be a limit to the credits they will accept, from which institutions, etc.</p>

<p>Is there anything she has always really wanted to do but just never had the time? Do her own choreography? Coach some kids herself? Spend some time abroad? Take ballet?</p>

<p>I would start with an inventory of the kind of things she’d like to do, then cobble something together… maybe live in Russia and train at a rink there while coaching some young dancers and learning the language? (just as a pie in the sky idea)</p>

4

<p>She was prepared to retire after this season, if her partner didn’t want to go on, but the ultimate goal was the Olympics in 2014. She would love to go to France (she’s been almost everywhere else!), and my first thought was to help her find a language program there, but I do not know which programs are reputable or if it is possible to apply without being part of an academic institution. That is my research for today. If anyone can enlighten me further, I would be grateful.</p>

5

<p>Have you tried just doing a Internet search for “gap year France”?</p>

<p>It will turn up lots of links – maybe you can start to see something appropriate.</p>

<p>Some will be very pricey. Hopefully someone here will respond with some good suggestions.</p>

6

<p>How about contacting the closest branch of Alliance Francaise? Someone in that organization could have good ideas for you. Here is the link to the one in DC [url=&lt;a href=“http://www.francedc.org/en/index.aspx]Alliance”&gt;http://www.francedc.org/en/index.aspx]Alliance</a> Fran</p>

7

<p>Check with her “dream school”. They may be willing to accept her for January admission; a lot of colleges have space on campus at that time due to more study abroad in the spring than in the fall, kids who drop out, etc. If she wants to start, that is.</p>

<p>Or she could do something like being an au pair in a foreign country (or could she teach skating somewhere for the year? Maybe she has some contacts through her skating experiences…).</p>

8

<p>Thank you. Alliance Francaise is a good idea (my search on gap years in France was completely overwhelming), and there is one very close to us.</p>

9

<p>School year abroad has a great program in France for high school juniors and seniors but I know some gap year kids who’ve done it, rotary has an OK one.</p>

10

<p>I did this program in France and so did both my brothers. [Institut</a> de Touraine](<a href=“http://www.institutdetouraine.com/en]Institut”>Learn French in France | French courses in France | Institut de Touraine) We combined it with a family homestay and after an academic year were fluent in French. Tours is a great location. They speak beautiful classic French and there is lots to do and see in the area.</p>

11

<p>Thank you everyone for your suggestions. I’m following up on each of them.</p>

12

<p>this is a link we used to research German opportunities, you might look for something similar in French speaking areas:</p>

<p>[Short-Term</a> Jobs in Germany, Austria and Switzerland](<a href=“http://www.transitionsabroad.com/listings/work/shortterm/germany.shtml]Short-Term”>Short-Term and Summer Jobs in Germany, Austria and Switzerland)</p>

13

<p>Call the school where she deferred. Ask about THEIR abroad programs starting in Jan for second semester.</p>

14

<p>I hope the CC powers’s don’t mind my dredging up an old thread, but it looks like you daughter worked things out :)) </p>

15

<p>Wondering if we are seeing her On our tv screens!</p>

16

<p>Well…on the Sochi thread, the op says the daughter is in Sochi with “her country” which I do not believe is the U.S.</p>

17

<p>Thanks Thumper, I haven’t read that thread. :slight_smile: </p>

18

<p>Lady Lorna posted that her D was named to her Olympic team in figure skating back in January. I don’t think that necessarily meant that it was the team of another country. I don’t know for sure but it could simply mean her Olympic team referring to her particular event. In any case, best of luck to her!</p>

19

<p>And if she’s in pairs, unlikely it would be for another country. Whatever team, it’s still wonderful! Congrats Lady Lorna!</p>

20

<p>On the London Olympics thread, LL said her daughter was an ice dancer! Congratulations to her on being named to the Olympic team for wherever! It’s an amazing accomplishment…such hard work and dedication!</p>