My H and I don’t always vote the same (he’s voting Johnson while I’m voting Clinton; 2012 election he voted Romney while I voted Obama). But there is a difference between fiscal conservatism and social conservatism. I suspect I’d have a very hard time living in an area with strong social conservatism.
OP.
I can only list what was important to me and not others as everybody is different. We have a second “home”, which is condo. We are planning to be 50/50 at 2 different locations
- Abroad
-within 1 mile from the ocean
-within .5 hours from airport
-walking distance to health care facilities
-good health care facilities
-first floor or one floor
-walking distance from the major grocery store of higher quality
-few steps from the pool
-outside covered balcony / porch
-lots of greenery around
-internet access
I have no idea what I will be doing during my retirement except for being a beach bum. I do not like reading, do not care for TV, have no plans to take care of my house (planning to have some kind of cleaning service) or cook. I can only think about studying Spanish and playing Sudoku, I have no idea how else to waste my time. I exercise about 2-3 hours / day and planning to continue with this. But it is very short time considering that I do not even sleep much, if lucky, then maybe 5 hours.
My parents retired twice. The first time was to Lexington VA. My Dad had a post retirement job there. I designed them a house on a 75 acre horse farm (they leased part of the land to the horse guy) and I designed them a house with one-story living. They thought they could get live in help if they needed it. It worked quite well for a long time, until my Dad began to decline. The farm, the big house, and the cranky husband with various mysterious ailments and mild dementia were just too much for my Mom. I was the closest kid and they were a good 7 to 8 hour drive from us, and the nears airport was more than hour from them so that wasn’t much better. In the end they packed up and moved north to the same town as one of my brothers. My Dad would grumble that you were supposed to move South when you retired (his parents went to Florida), but by then he was no longer socializing anyway. They lived in their own little house with a first floor master bedroom for another five years or so and then later after my Dad passed and my mother started showing signs of decline she moved in with my brother. (Luckily they lived in a huge house that had been a bed and breakfast so putting a bathroom back in off one of the ground floor rooms was easy.)
BTW they had no political problems in Lexington both parties were active, but they were somewhat taken aback at the beginning at the assumption they were Christians.
“Random thoughts–someone mentioned wondering what that thunder sound was–I would be really sad to live in a place with no or rare thunderstorms–they’re one of the joys of summer!”
I lived in the mid South for years. You see the storms, wait for the tornado sirens. I fly in the South all summer, get my fill of thunderstorms. Not a joy. Maybe I’d miss them…if I didn’t see them for ten years. We get a brief look at them every now and then at home, that’s enough for me!
“My H and I don’t always vote the same (he’s voting Johnson while I’m voting Clinton; 2012 election he voted Romney while I voted Obama). But there is a difference between fiscal conservatism and social conservatism. I suspect I’d have a very hard time living in an area with strong social conservatism.”
People might be surprised how much they have in common with what they consider to be the other side. I’d imagine a large group of people consider themselves fiscally conservative and socially liberal. I think your husband is in good company this year.
I would hate to limit where I live based upon political affiliations, but maybe if people have the MYOB mentality in that regard, it would be easier. Also with religious affiliations.
I am “retired” but H wants to work for 2 or 3 more years. We will keep a home base of some sort here in MN as both Ds have bought homes within 10 minutes of us. I want to be connected to future grandkids as much as possible. We also own a lake home 90 minutes away(in WI) where we spend most of our summers but I would not live there permanently as it is too isolated but it will be a wonderful place for family to gather in the summers. Our large suburban home is too big so we are fixing things up for a sale down the road…new roof this week, new windows next week. We have a large private wooded lot and love gardening and entertaining out on the deck so I don’t see us moving to an apartment/condo in the city. We really do like MN as we are 15-20 minutes from airport, universities, and excellent healthcare. The snow doesn’t bother us as the roads are cleared very quickly. The cold, however, can be brutal. H and I both love the Palm Desert area in the middle of winter and we also loved the Healdsburg,CA area in the fall .We will probably look for a smaller home in our area and just pay for someone to do maintenance as needed and travel for short term stays in favorite areas until we can’t travel any more. Also can’t imagine not having our friends around. We have an active group of friends who will be doing the same thing we have planned. It would be a lot of work to find new book clubs, poker and 500 groups, Bunco ladies and golf and tennis partners! 
@shellfell I think the Bay Area might have everything that you are looking for–except maybe affordability. Look at Berkeley for a college town, actually more like a small city, that fits the criteria.
I’ve been semi-lurking on this thread. I find it fascinating … and totally unnecessary in my life.
The thought of retiring somewhere besides where you’ve made your life is foreign to me. Why wouldn’t you choose to live your whole life in a place you liked, instead of waiting to retire to make the kind of life you want? I can see getting a cabin or a condo for part of a year or something, but I can’t imagine pulling up roots from my 30-year home. It’s paid off. I have tons of friends and ties in the community. Everything I could want already is here (well, better public transit would be nice, but that’s not a reason to leave) because I planned it that way.
The exception I could see is if both my kids resettled to the same place and started having kids. But then I wouldn’t be “retiring” there, I’d be moving so I could be near my grandkids!
Oh this is an easy one for me to answer! 
The life I have today (and am SUPER happy with) is not what I want in 5 years, or 10 years, or 20. Each stage of my life and each accomplishment allows me to go and do and see and appreciate different things in the world.
I want to absorb and experience as much of the world as I possibly can before I die, and I can’t do that from the nicest rocking chair on the nicest front porch of the nicest house I’ve been living in for 30 years. I would see that house as an anchor keeping me from setting sail.
But, I don’t think my way is the “right” way. It’s just the right way for me and H.
pog2016 - S1 lives in the Bay area, so we are very familiar with it. It does meet alot of criteria, but affordability is an issue there. Also, although S1 lives there now, he’s planning to move back east in the next 3-5 years. When he does, we would then be 3000 miles away from both of our kids if we lived in CA, which would be too far.
^ when H left the Army ( he is a military academy grad), his job experiences and skills made it easy for home to find good jobs in the DC area though not in the Midwest where we really wanted to live to be near family and friends. And while we have enjoyed living in this area and raining our family here, it is not where we ultimately wish to be.
Youdon’tsay- In many cases people live where they need to live for employment, and that might not be where they want to be when they are retired and have a lot of leisure time. Most people don’t get to live in western NC during their working years- or in Key West, San Diego or wherever! I am fortunate that I relocated for a job 10 years ago and fell in love with my community and don’t want to leave, but I sure had plans to retire elsewhere than Dallas, where I had been for 28 years! I loved a lot of things about Dallas, but I was tired of the heat, traffic and lack of natural beauty.
@Youdon’tsay I’m kind of with you. If I do move, it will be someplace even closer to the ocean. I once had a boss who said he always tried to work in a place where people liked to vacation. It’s worked for me.
My office is 2 blocks from the ocean. If I have 2 hours free, nice to go there.
SE FL has large Jewish community, and pretty Liberal. We don’t want large condos blocking ocean views. We like trees and flowers in the middle of the road. It’s affordable.
What I miss is the variety of restaurants in Cambridge and Boston. Too many chains here.
In response to 1214mom (who asked how one decides when to retire):
I saw my 2 sets of parents (divorced/re-married) get offered early retirement packages back in the 80’s. They were in their mid-fifties and both sets opted to retire. They had many years of active retirement living (not to mention pensions with COLA increases and health insurance.)
I wanted this. (I’m especially envious now of the pensions and health insurance
I’ve been working toward it for a long time now, including cultivating the hobbies that I plan to continue during retirement. I’m 58 and will enter semi-retirement in December. I’ll work 20 hours/week because I want something to get me out of the house and exercise my brain. I plan to do more traveling, knitting, exercise, and music. It’s really a wonderful feeling to know that if I don’t like that schedule, I can just resign any time I want. It’s also kind of cool that the financial planner that I worked with is making noises about offering me a part-time job in their office.
We are in the process of cleaning up the house with a plan of putting it on the market next April. It is a strange thing to think about leaving the community where I raised my daughter but we are seriously talking about it. The Philadelphia suburbs have been a lovely place to live but only a few of our friends will stay over the long haul.
Though his office is in Philadelphia H was in New York enough for work that we bought a small apartment in the city almost ten years ago. He would live there full time in a second. He is recharged by the city. I love being there for a couple of days but find it draining after a week or so. His argument is that everyone we love comes to NYC a few times a year so we would still see them. I usually respond by saying, “OMG, how would I grill?” I am a four season, multiple times a week grill-er.
I want more rural and in my perfect world we would sell the PA and NYC places (PA won’t go for much but NYC has increased in value) and move to Martha’s Vineyard. During the quietest part of the winter we would get a VRBO somewhere warmer for a month or so.
In theory H wins the good-health-care-in-proximity argument but the Martha’s Vineyard Hospital is now an affiliate of Mass General and has become an excellent staging hospital in an emergency. Friends of ours (past health care professionals) who have retired on the island spend a couple of days in Boston each year having scheduled all of their regular doctor visits. It can work.
We have been renting on the island off and on (visiting during all seasons) for almost 40 years. I can see how easy it would be to establish a life there. It is our daughter’s favorite place so I know wherever she ends up she will find her way back to the island for visits.
First world problems I know…and you are all shaking your heads wondering how the heck these two people are still married. One way or the other we are in the process of cleaning up the PA house in preparation for putting it on the market next April. THAT H and I are in agreement about. I am a little bit sad but at the same time pretty excited.
There are two stages of the retirement years which require different choices: there are the active retirement years and the superannuated, feeble, needing help years.
For the first, I know what I want.
- Sunny skies. I cannot stand gray, gloomy days, no matter what the temperature.
- A real community. So many of the sunshine state retirement communities are made up of snowbirds. Half of your neighbors disappear in the summer to go back to their ‘other’ home.
- A tennis community with active clubs and tennis events. This is very important to me. So often I go out to one of the retirement community areas in Arizona or Palm Springs area and the courts are there, but no one is on them.
- Close to mountains. I want to keep hiking as long as I can.
But the most important thing for both stages of retirement is to be close to my kids; a one hour drive would be good. I want to be close enough to see them often but far enough away that I am not infringing on ‘their’ space. I don’t want to be the suffocating mother.
I’m similar to @Youdon’tsay in that I have a full life where I live and can’t imagine moving.
My present community meets most of my wants though I can see that one day our present house could be isolating.
- near the ocean - my H has a great group of men he plays beach volleyball with several days a week.
-family nearby, a couple of my kids have moved back, In laws an hour away - temperatures that are comfortable to be outside year round- H wears shorts year round
- casual community. You don’t see many suits and ties and I can wear jeans most anywhere.
-good medical care
-adult learning opportunities - fairly liberal population
-environmentally conscious - I can get anywhere in town in 15 minutes
Things that aren’t ideal.
Our present house is in a semi rural area of town. No bus service and while it is great walking for fitness I can’t walk to any services. I love the downtown area of our city but that would mean giving up our private beach and I don’t think I can convince my H to have two houses here. Our house is also large. We only use 1 wing of the house unless we have guests. We have lived in our house 30 yrs and hopefully one day we will have grandchildren come visit.
Housing costs are expensive and continue to rise. It makes it difficult for my children to live here even with good paying jobs. We are considering helping them at some point buy here.
Pretty bad homeless problem in parts of the area.
Summer gloomy skies.
We have a regional airport but to fly to many places we need to drive 2 hours to LAX. We do have a great airport shuttle that takes some of the negative out of that.
It would be nice to have more diversity.
A big not ideal is the long lingering drought. It is sad to see so much brown in the landscape and lakes with little water.
When we travel as we come home my H without fail makes the statement when he sees the ocean that it is so beautiful here why does he need to vacation elsewhere.
Adding one big con- No Target. I have to drive 45 minutes for better shopping.
I thought we’d be selling our current home and building a much smaller one story house near D1 when dh retires. Not only has dh postponed his retirement yet again, he now says he doesn’t want to move. He loves our view, property taxes are relatively low, and we’ll definitely recognize a large loss on sale because the market here for big houses has not improved since the crash. His parents were in their 90s when they died and they remained in the home they bought in the early '60s until the end. Dh now wants to do the same and points out that we don’t need to make any major modifications to the house to accommodate a walker or wheelchair.
As for retirement timing, I wish I knew for certain. Dh talked about early retirement for years. It didn’t happen at 50 or 55 or 60. Pretty soon there will be nothing “early” about it. He used to want to travel more, but we both have some medical issues that make travel difficult these days. Dh worries about the rising cost of health care for us, and for one of our kids who has a serious chronic condition, to the extent that I wonder if any amount of savings will ever be enough for him.
Yesterday, prompted by this thread, I asked dh what he envisions doing when he retires. He was quiet for a few minutes then said, “I guess I’ll finally catch up with your To Do list. You seem to add some new house repair or project every week.” No wonder he keeps postponing retirement if he can’t think of anything more positive.
Great thread - so much to think about. DH and I are in San Diego & for the most part love it. There are some drawbacks - traffic can be bad, we’ve been evacuated twice due to wildfires, & it is DRY. But this also means the weather is conducive to running, biking, hiking pretty much every day of the year. The inland part of the county (where we are) is a desert climate & not particularly pretty, though the coast is stunning. We also have a really amazing theater community, for those who are interested in that.
We live in a 1600 sq ft 1970’s home without much charm - I enjoy going on Zillow to see what we could buy other places in the country. But they don’t come with the weather…
DH and I lived in Philadelphia for several year in our 20s/30s & loved it there as well, but really missed our Mexican food - I literally can’t go without access to excellent Mexican cuisine.