What to consider when deciding retirement location and readiness to retire

Parent Cafe
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Here is an interesting article comparing cost of living in terms of what $100 will buy in each state. They also look at how salaries are affected by high costs of living, with some states providing relatively high salaries and low cost of living (ready to move to North Dakota?). Looks like @HImom was not exaggerating about Hawaii, very expensive place to live without high salaries to compensate.
http://www.nytimes.com/2016/08/09/business/what-100-can-buy-state-by-state.html?smid=fb-nytimes&smtyp=cur&_r=0
The problem with this article is that it doesn’t break down costs within states. California, for example, has huge differences in expenses within the state.

In addition to access to good medical care retirees should also consider access to quality caregivers and senior care facilities. My mom lives in a beautiful resort community but had to move from her home to assisted living because we couldn’t find adequate support to help her stay in her home. The region is too expensive for caregivers to live affordably and the extremely wealthy residents hire away the best caregivers for their private help.

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I’m with Youdon’tsay, but realize it’s in part because we lucked out ~20 yrs ago when we chose our current location.

We are very early retirees…we retired in our 40s. We have discussed our 5 yr, 10 yr, and beyond goals. In each scenario there are many variables to consider. In a lot of ways it’s similar to the ‘college discussions’.

You do your best to be pragmatic. Personally, we like the peace of mind we get from reducing stress when possible. Part of that comes from appreciating what you already have. The other part is trying to project your future needs and desires without trying to impress others.

I like to watch the HGTV house shows while working out. I find it interesting how people make decisions. Balancing emotional and financial conflicts. I see compromise and delayed gratification as necessary components to long term happiness.

Some of the things I love about our current (Chicago suburb) location are:
– family, friends, established network of relationships with doctors and many other professionals
– four seasons
– clean, well maintained feel without excessive congestion
– educated population
– wide variety of nearby dining and entertainment venues
_- lots of quality grocery stores
– Lake Michigan water
– sports teams!!
– it’s relatively flat (I work out daily, but my knees don’t like hills)
– O’Hare airport…I appreciate direct flights
– familiarity…I really like the pace and general values of the Midwest.

For now we plan on staying in this home. We can see ourselves staying in it even though it will be large for just the 2 of us, when our college-age children no longer come home for breaks. It’s paid for and the taxes (we’re unincorporated) aren’t bad. Something that might affect this plan is if both our children settle and start a family elsewhere.

As for the long future view, we are planning on moving to a senior residence with multi-levels of care available around 80…maybe sooner…even if we are in relatively good shape. We have older parents and we have seen that around 80 it would probably make sense to relinquish some of the living ‘chores’…cooking, cleaning, house maintenance…and establish a support network. We don’t want to be a burden to our children.

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@Youdon’tsay , I agree with you and posted the same sentiment a few pages back. Can’t imagine leaving our friends, community and our Ds who do live nearby. I think it’s sad when people don’t have the same type of wonderful ties that we are fortunate enough to have.

We travel a lot and are certainly not stuck in rocking chairs! :wink:

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I forgot about the when of retiring in my post
I’m “retired”. My H is down to a 3 1/2 day work week. He takes all day Friday off and goes in late on Wednesday. My H would love to fully retire. We have a family business so I don’t know if that is realistic. One of our children is working in the business with him which is allowing us to take off for longer periods of extended travel.

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I don’t think many of us can count on our kids to stay in one place. It’s a very mobile society. Also, with social media, it is easier to maintain relationships and stay in touch. It’s a lot different than family moves back in the “day”. We left Dallas 10 years ago and I still feel like my relationships from my 28 years there are strong. Of course, a lot of my socialization, as I said, comes through my job, and if I left it I would lose a lot of that even staying in the same community.

I grew up in the Philadelphia area and I visit there frequently. For many reasons- some unique to me, probably- I would gore both eyes out before I would move back there. I left Chicago after law school + 2 years of working because it was just too dang cold- more so than Philadelphia/Indiana. I’m really not a person who enjoys city living. I loved Dallas, but it got big and busy and ugly- and hot. Very, very hot (and I like warm weather). When I landed in the Nashville area it was like Goldilocks- pretty much perfection. Big negative is inadequate public transportation. The city knows it but I don’t see how it gets fixed very quickly. And- the fact that Nashville is the current “it” city has caused priced to rise and very rapid growth. The bachelorette parties with pink plastic penises dangling from veils worn with cut-off short shorts and cowboy boots are not a good touch. But- I can hang out in my awesome civil war town outside of Nashville on my deck and look at beautiful trees, cows and hot air balloons.

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We love San Diego, but the cost of housing takes it totally off of our list. We live in a fully paid for house, and want our retirement home to be paid for. Can’t happen in San Diego.

Love the idea of being near our kids. But they live 2500 miles apart and I don’t see that changing.

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Good luck with that.

One of my kids lives in the Pacific time zone; the other lives in the Mountain time zone. I’m in the Eastern time zone and still working (and so is my husband). Finding a time when I can talk with either kid on the phone is like planning a military campaign.

And even if my husband and I moved to be nearer to one of the kids, there’s no guarantee that the young person would stay put. My son, age 30, has lived in five places since college. My daughter, age 27, has lived in three (each in a different time zone). And neither is necessarily settled where they live now.

Young people today seem to come with wings rather than roots.

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Our kids haven’t moved much. S moved from LA ( where he graduated from college) to DC/Va, where he works and has been in the general area since 2011, tho has lived in several different units over that time. He’s been in his same unit for about 3 years and is considering buying it.

D has been in LA, since she went to college there in 2009. No idea where D or S will ultimately settle–they don’t seem to know either.

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D and SIL are hoping to end up living in the place where H and I would like to retire. S has expressed interest in ultimately settling there too. Our kids grew up far from family and feel they missed out on that. Different priorities for different folks, but that one is important for us.

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Some kids move around a lot; some don’t. I don’t think it’s an across-the-board thing. Both of mine are in Jersey with no plans to move–they are both not the “move for a better job” kind of person, though both like to travel a lot. So staying within a reasonable drive from them makes sense for me.

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Agreed. All five of mine are where they started their careers and it’s unlikely that any of them will move. I’m always a bit surprised when young adults move around so much early on in their post-college lives. I actually don’t know many who have done that. I’m fortunate that three of mine are in the same city, one a four hour drive away, and one ‘across the pond’. Even the one in the UK we see often, though, as she travels with her theatre career often enough that it usually works out to about once every 6-8 weeks that we see her either in Toronto or we meet up in NY.

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Both of my s’s live across country. They live about an hour from each other but see each other most every day. We are happy that they are so close to each other, but CA is not a retiree-friendly state and it would probably be outside our budget to consider living there. Older s and wife are unlikely to move (they bought a house and are not too far from her parents) , and while I don’t expect younger s to relocate, who knows. Both are very happy in their jobs, but I never say never.

Even though where we live is a great retirement location, several close friends have moved for any of a variety of reasons. So for now, we stay put. We are pretty settled here.

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Being within the range of my married kids is a priority to me, but I am unlikely to live very near them. Each is located a five-hour drive from H and my main home. (We have a little condo closer to them.) D and her H are very committed to their city, which works great for their lifestyle and careers. S and wife are younger, just starting out (she in a veterinarian practice), but I could see them staying where they are, an area with a lot of appeal to them. Both are north of us but also about five hours from each other horizontally. They do get together occasionally independently of us parents.

My game plan for retirement is for H and I to take quarterly vacations of a week or so based in the area of one of the kid’s homes. We would spend some time with them and some on our own. Plus on occasion during the year, we meet up with them at other sites. Plus son married his high school sweetheart, so her parents live within a few miles of us which helps in planning.

I would be very disinclined to move to be further from the “kids” (and, so far, one grandkid), but very unlikely to move closer to them either. H and I are likely to spend retirement in the state where we have lived for three decades. I have challenging medical issues and great docs in my area, so give that aspect priority. Plus we appreciate the connections we have developed here.

Glad we don’t have to fly to visit the kids, although on occasion we do.

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For now, all can say is that I’m nowhere near ready for a senior center.
It would temporarily solve a lot if mine could just move to DC, SF, or SDO and have an extra room for a nice stay.

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I’m trying to figure out if we should move from “the big house” to a smaller place near where we work, assuming kids launch before we retire, and then maybe move once we get a sense of where they may land.
I heard on the radio that the median house in San Jose is priced at over $1 million. WOW.
I know people work for Google, Apple, etc., but not everyone makes that much money. I have an aunt sitting on a very large house there. Nobody would consider her wealthy, but I guess she doesn’t have to worry about nursing home costs.

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Our son lives in SC, about 1200 miles away. Daughter lives in the same State as us (OK) but she and her husband do not want to stay. I have never felt at home in the small town we live in in OK, even after 28 years. Have had some great friends over the years but they were all from elsewhere and have call moved. (My 2 closest friends are now in Houston. If wed moved there force job I’d have quite enjoyed it I think, but I could not live there now). Florida is where I have been thinking of. I have always loved FL, don’t know where daughter will land, it will be a little closer to our son (8 hours rather than 20) . i also have 2 very old English friends who have homes in the area I am leaning toward (one full time the other plans to winter there). Though I fell in love with Spanish moss draped Oaks in Savannah and especially with St Simons island, GA when we vacationed with my brother and his wife (visiting SC from England) and my son this Spring.

I’d do it today if finances were in the right place. Probably a couple of years off. I am 63 but my husband is 74 so I worry a bit about him being able to make the move if we leave it too long.

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I am sitting here looking at the “For Sale” sign in front of our house, so we are in the process of downsizing. We know that North Carolina is the next stop on this journey of retirement, but until we sell the house, we don’t see any reason to leave until the snow comes (we sold the snowblower in the yard sale, oops.) This is the first time since I was 21 that I felt I could go anywhere and do anything, so while I hate not having a clear plan, I am enjoying this time. Maybe we can do this, maybe we could do that. Finances will place a cap on what we can do, but I think there is a fair amount of opportunities underneath that cap. H has been retired for 9 days now.

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Here’s my rambling response (it’s late and I don’t feel like writing a well thought out essay…).

Went through the where to retire bit already- started thinking about it and visited various areas. Then it took a year to find our house. Criteria included weather (no more snow!), medical care, libraries, colleges, costs, religion (no Bible Belt), politics. Tampa, FL became the place to be.

Religion doesn’t always show up on ratings lists- it matters a lot if you are not a member of the common belief system. North Carolina- out for us, we had considered the research triangle for a bit.

Likewise it is nicer to be with a politically likeminded majority, or 50-50. Want good medical care because, well, we’re getting older.

Weather matters- dislike deserts and a trip to New Mexico didn’t change my mind. Tired of winter. Earthquakes a negative. So is prolonged drought.

Woods and water. Hills or mountains nice but lakes needed more than vertical terrain.

Culture matters as well. Major U is so different than an ordinary college. Having Indian grocery stores and plenty of those around became a pleasant plus for us (H from India). I can see why people look at the ethnic mix of an area.

Big city airport is wonderful after driving/flying to one all those years.

Politics. The Villages in FL would not like us. Tampa is about 50-50 politically. The friends I have made are all on the same page, I do not discuss it with one neighbor, others agree with our views.

No retirement communities for us. Pleasant neighborhood with ages 1 to 90. Check each other’s paper/mail (politics don’t matter for friendliness)- stop the paper and inevitably one or two get delivered. Our part of town has many ethnic groups(continents), religious beliefs, ages and many came from points north (various regions). The Hispanic influence comes from varied cultures.

We chose to live where people would retire TO in case of a hurricane- can visit the beaches. Screened outdoor areas- sun and shade- are a must. Lizards are cute, although I miss chipmunks. Skinny squirrels. Deer must be in every place, sigh. Dislike snakes and alligators- ponds/lakes are not for swimming. FLAT Florida. Hot and humid summers, but the rain comes in batches- sunny otherwise , unlike November visit to Seattle where I saw 5 minutes of a bit of blue sky in a week.

Can’t be close to a twenty something son- who knows where he will be in a few years.

Florida and Washington are two income tax free states. I thought the 7.5% sales tax is bad (5-5.5% in WI) but it is 9.5 in Seattle!. Housing costs fairly low in Tampa. Plenty of older people so plenty of things available for our age group while the rest have their life as well.

Pacific Northwest for summers and Florida for winters suit us. But, having two places would be a hassle (as would the nearly 3000 miles travel). I do like the Minneapolis area but have no reasons to live there instead of elsewhere.

When making choices the most important factor is people. Those with friends, family and or religious group in an area will enjoy the socialization. Having a majority or nearly so politically flavors a town. No place has the perfect climate. Readers like us devour library books and being able to take seniors lecture type classes or audit university ones conveniently matters.

I noticed that I like typical Florida house architecture (and PNW as well). I enjoy being with people who came from other places- northern states and other countries, no outsiders by virtue of roots here. It’s been a refreshing change and H has had more home culture than ever.

I can see where different places fit different people- what I dislike/like is the opposite for some. H loves the heat, I stay indoors (discovered the glasses steam up leaving instead of entering the stores).

The above said for our retirement place- I think it is different to have to raise a family with the way the state does education and runs other things. Having so many newcomers and vacationers makes the area welcoming to strangers.

Give us ten more years for son to be permanently where we would like to live or for us to have sunk our roots here. We’ll probably die before the waters cover this area, or we’ll move.

It seems to be most important to find a list of positives about an area to move to. Then the negatives are not overwhelming. I do notice how seemingly varied the people I have met here are (plenty of retired age) but we all have something in common. We all chose to live here. It wasn’t the default area because of growing up here and not thinking about going far from home but a willingness to take the bad with the good.

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On a roll. Readiness to retire. Finances and health come to mind. We could afford early (before Medicare/Social Security) . I had retired a long time ago but stayed where H had his established job. He chose his retirement age. It has been several years and he finally has made the true adjustment- no more wishing he could still be working. He found intellectual things to occupy his mind that he never had time for before. We have the money.

It takes some doing to shift gears, get out of the comfortable rut. Better to do it sooner than wait too long. I have met people here who lost spouses or their health has deteriorated. Best to be young enough to establish in a community while one still has the energy to do so. Retirement golfing and other seniors activities sound boring on an every day basis. A permanent vacation is not what one really wants. In fact, taking vacations is an activity during retirement- a change from the everyday scenery and life.

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“Retirement golfing and other seniors activities sound boring on an every day basis. A permanent vacation is not what one really wants. In fact, taking vacations is an activity during retirement- a change from the everyday scenery and life.”

Some people do like retirement golfing and those types of activities. I’m not really sure you can say “that’s not what one wants.” That may not be what YOU want, but plenty of people enjoy that lifestyle just fine, socialize, keep their minds active and are neither bored not boring.