Cleaning out my parent’s house was a huge chore for about 12 months, sifting and then defining whether something was of value - sentimental or otherwise. Alot of ebay searching and such. What was surprising was the lack of value of their china and silver. It was sad because I remember how delicate and special my Mom had treated it, like it was the family jewels. I ended up keeping the china and letting the silver go (since the only memory I had of it was being forced to polish the silver for company).
In my area, contemporary silver flatware sells at auction for the price of the melted down silver.
It is definitely the way to buy it, if you are interested. Much less expensive than Replacements.
Just noticed that my iPhone does not like “lead”. 
I got handed down a tea set that was probably loaded with lead. I tossed the pieces and only kept one cup and a saucer in the hopes to make a tea cup display. This will not happen any time soon, so will trow out that one, too.
My H says he has no issues with me keeping my photos from college & grad school, with or without the BFs in the pictures. We have all moved on with our lives but haven’t tossed those photos or albums yet.
TatinG, in my opinion, if you start to cry when you contemplate throwing certain things away, that is a clear-cut sign that you should not throw them away–at least not now, for sure.
With regard to the china and flatware, you may have siblings or cousins whose children would like them eventually. Formal dinners are not much in vogue now, in many areas, but they may come back. Also, it’s nice to have a treasured family heirloom. We use china and sterling for Thanksgiving, Christmas, and a few other special occasions, and I am glad to have the items.
One of my aunts liked modern furniture exclusively, when the family antiques were being handed around. She basically didn’t get any of them, because she was not interested. But subsequently, her style in furnishings changed. She bought a Victorian house! She was able to acquire a number of the family items for it, at later times.
One of my great-aunts had a dress from the 1920’s that she had saved. A cousin had it altered and wore it to her brother’s wedding, with great panache.
We have a black silk jacket from an in-law’s relative, from about the 1890’s. I am saving it for the future, despite there being no one to wear it just currently. It is a pretty unique item.
I think a gradual approach to giving items you no longer want to relatives, giving them to charity, or selling them, is the right way to go about it, provided that you have enough room to store them in the meantime.
One of my best friends wore her mom’s wedding gown to her wedding (cleaned and altered slightly). It made both of them so happy. It was a very joyous celebration! For the most part, I’m not good at parting with sentimental stuff. I will try it when I’m feeling like decluttering is what I need to do. My son is much better about it than the rest of us. We will work on it–it’s a work in progress.
I didn’t much care about my wedding gown, but DH is a packrat and if I got rid of it his feelings would be hurt. So the kids can deal with it. Unless I put it somewhere it might be at risk of water damage…
I’m getting pretty good at getting rid of stuff but the sentimental stuff is NOT where you start if you want to downsize. It’s the very last thing to work on. Especially if it doesn’t involve a lot of room. You may need to decide immediately on keeping a huge piece of inherited furniture or an antique car but the love letters, small items, jewelry, the vintage clothing etc–just stuff them back in the box for a later time. Re-visit it when you feel more ruthless or run out of room.
My solution to the sentimental stuff is to look objectively at it and then keep half automatically.
What’s the best? Need ALL the kids drawings?–no, so whittle it down. All the baby clothes?–no, but allow yourself half.
All the china? Do you like it even? Be honest. Try to give half away–if nobody wants it well…donate it.
Somebody will be thrilled to have it. Just not you.
Eventually you’ll re-visit the stash you kept the first time and realize you can depart with another half.
(As to wedding dresses, I’m sentimental about keeping my marriage but not the dress–I have pictures for that)
I agree with others to keep parts of stuff. I kept the lace bodice of my wedding gown and threw the dress out (it was never professionally cleaned after my wedding and was not in a condition for anybody to wear). Keep a teacup or plate from the china set and get rid of the rest. (Note this may not be easy. I have had no luck getting rid of my grandmothers china set - been trying for several years). Keep whittling down. I had not saved much of my daughter’s school work but recently went through and dumped much of it. Same for the baby items/clothes - went through and got rid of much of it.
Just use that extra china. Or send it to college with the kids to use. Same thing with the flatware. As long as you continue to think of this as something only for special occasions, it will never see the light of day anywhere. MIL has sent my DD (the only grandchild) her service-for-almost-too-many-to-count wedgwood china. DD is thrilled, and plans to use it for every day. But she might not tell her grandmother so as to not scandalize her. 
The problem with the old china and silverware is that it can’t go in the dishwasher - so many people don’t want to use it everyday and have to hand wash.
Of course the china can go in the dishwasher. Then it wears out and chips, then you throw it away. Better than keeping it in boxes in the basement for decades.
eta: The silver can go in the dishwasher if you don’t also have stainless in there. Either one alone is ok.
I grew up with a hoarder. A true hoarder that could have been featured on that TV show so I’m pretty ruthless about purging and not bringing stuff that I don’t think I will use into our house. On our 25th anniversary I opened my wedding dress that had been professionally cleaned and dh and I had pictures taken mirroring a few from our wedding – it was a hoot! My D’s are all taller than I and the style of my dress is classic 80s so there’s no way they’ll want it. Oldest D did say that she’d love to have a piece of it, though, sewn in somewhere underneath, to wear on her special day. So, I am still keeping it. Another friend of mine kept hers and then put it in the dress up box when her kids were small. That dress saw hours of use and fun.
Good luck to the OP. I do agree that, if it brings you joy and you have room for it, keep it. BUT it’s so important to not leave your kids with mound of things to sift through while they’re grieving. Assess what they might want while you’re young and healthy and proceed accordingly.
This thread reminded me that I have one box of old baby clothes saved from my kids. I bet they’re all faded and yellow…no way could a grand baby that’s nowhere in sight use them. Will have to check and then would pretty happily toss if that’s the case.
If the items are unusable ( which, unfortunately, time can render them. – yellowing, moths, dry rot), get rid of them. But why not make an occasion of it? You could share your remembrances, maybe invite some others who were part of it, document it however you like… sort of a “celebration of the life of” for the objects you are letting go of.
We have inherited the keepsakes of 3 parents at this point, and many of the “things” vs. letters and photos, are meaningless to us. You could give them meaning now while your kids are around and spare them getting rid of these items lster.
One of my parents likes to joke that all of the stuff will be my problem when he/she is gone. I truly do not understand why one would burden their children with these decisions. What it does is make the sorting process overwhelming and therefore everything goes. If a parent doesn’t specify a few items that were important or family heirlooms, how is the child supposed to?
If there are items you’d like to remember but not keep, take photos of each item and make a photo book with a short description. I’ve used Shutterfly and Blurb for other projects, and they always turn out nicely.
I took photos of some stuff last year, then shared them with our kids and asked if there was anything they wanted. I was happy to pass along the few items they wanted. Most of the rest was donated, but I still have about four plastic bins in closets. One contains baby clothes and a handmade crib quilt that I nearly donated a few years ago but just couldn’t do it. They’re in surprisingly good condition. D1 & our new SiL hope to have children, so I’ll hold on to that bin a while longer.
We usually use our sterling flatware for holidays and special occasions, but used my parent’s for the first time recently when our kids were here. D1 remembered it from holidays at their home, so I may be keeping it after all (she has her own pattern.) I put sterling, china and crystal in the dishwasher, too. So far no problems, as long as I remember to check that Dh hasn’t put stainless steel and sterling in the same load.
Another big bin holds a lot of silver plate serving pieces, candle holders and two dozen punch cups. That stuff is a pain to polish so I rarely use any of it. I’m not sure what to do with it besides donate it to a thrift store since silver plate doesn’t have much value. Every time I start to load it in my car to drop off, it seems like I hear my grandmother having a conniption.
“Every time I start to load it in my car to drop off, it seems like I hear my grandmother having a conniption.”
Maybe your grandmother would have enthusiastically embraced the more modern style of entertaining if she had been around now. Just think of all she could have done with the time saved by not polishing silver.
They may bring me pain if my wife catches me looking at them.
Really, the main reason they are still around is inertia. I probably will get rid of them the next time I run across them. I think I could substantially reduce the amount of stuff I’ve saved if I just discarded any item I can’t remember anything about.
I think Marie Kondo has some good ideas (although I wouldn’t go as far as she does with some things).
Here is one tip…you know ALL of those trophies from sports or dance or whatever? I pulled all of the little name things off of them, and put the name things in one 4 x 6 picture frame. It had the info…frame held about 10 little things.
Then I tossed the trophies.
Silpat, I understand exactly what you mean about hearing your grandmother having a conniption. I have the same problem hearing my mother’s voice, or maybe it’s just look she would give me, when I try to get rid of some of her things. She passed away 5 years ago and she can still stop me in my tracks. It would be funny if it wasn’t so tragic. For now, it’s easier to hang onto the boxes than deal with my issues.