<p>Hey guys,
I am international admitted student and planning to go to University of Washington, Seattle for Computer Science this Fall. When my parents brought out the news to my relatives(uncles&aunts), they kinda demoralized them by saying that why not make him study in India for undergrad?( I hate these kind of relatives :/) Although,my parents are happy that i am going to UW, I want to make sure that these uncles and aunts don’t try to interfere. Can you guys help onto what should I say to them? </p>
<p>Tell them Microsoft is in Washington State.</p>
<p>Microsoft, Seahawks, Starbucks & legal marijuana ( for those of age).
Tell them you & your parents are both happy with your decision, & thank them for their interest.</p>
<p>What are their main reservations? </p>
<p>And this is any of their business because… why? How could they “interfere”?</p>
<p>Well, why ARE you going to the US for this phase of your education? Why not just tell the truth?</p>
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<p>I would recommend leaving out the legal marijuana bit considering it’s off-putting even for parents who aren’t old-world/school types.</p>
<p>I’d also emphasize top 10 CS department and the fact getting admitted to the CS department of UW-Seattle is an accomplishment in itself. </p>
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<p>Extended family peer pressure is very strong, especially in more traditionalist parts of India from what I’ve heard and noticed from my South Asian classmates and colleagues. </p>
<p>It’s not too different from what I’ve seen among some fellow Chinese-Americans or other immigrant groups…especially families who are much more old-world in their mentality. </p>
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<p>One major issue with higher education in India is like many East Asian countries, competition to gain entry to topflight colleges with good education/career prospects is governed by exceedingly intensive college entrance exams to a relative handful of topflight colleges which make the college entrance process here in the states look like a cakewalk. </p>
<p>Unless a given student makes it into one of the IITs or a topflight university with equivalent CS programs, the educational quality tends to drop off rapidly once goes to lower-tiered universities due to lack of sustained educational investment and burgeoning demand from applicants. Also, there’s the factor one must score high enough not only for a given college, but also a highly popular department like CS. </p>
<p>Mainland China’s facing a similar issue issue right now.</p>
<p>Home of Bill Gates and Jeff Bezos, and fewer nosy people here. My son’s HS is probably 1/3 Indian so not like you are heading to unknown places.</p>
<p>I think Redmond’s population is 1/4 Indian, so yes, there is a large Indian community here.</p>
<p>One of my acquaintances is being relocated by his employer, a large US corporation, to lead a division in his native country. So… Even if you get a degree from a US school, your chances of coming back are not zero. </p>
<p>Tell them that studying abroad will give you an edge in the global economy.</p>
<p>Tell them that US kids study abroad, too. :)</p>
<p>"And this is any of their business because… why? How could they “interfere”?</p>
<p>Extended family peer pressure is very strong, especially in more traditionalist parts of India from what I’ve heard and noticed from my South Asian classmates and colleagues."</p>
<p>So, cobrat? That doesn’t answer the question. How are they going to “interfere”? The fact that other people may <em>think</em> something doesn’t have to affect you. </p>
<p>Tell them you are just getting sick of the nonsense relatives. 
just kidding.</p>
<p>@cobrat, I am fully aware of the situation regarding University entrance in Asia. In fact, I assumed that that is at least part of the reason the OP is coming to the US. My feeling is that, since everyone there must know it, why not just say so? And also, perhaps, point out that getting into the CS program at UW is an accomplishment, as mentioned above, that sets the OP up well in the future.</p>
<p>I also understand the family pressure thing. But unless the family manages to pressure the OP’s parents into backing out, it will probably amount to nothing more than an annoyance–albeit a significant one–until he leaves. (Or are these relatives whose kids all got into IIT who are bent upon impressing the OP with his inferiority…who knows.)</p>
<p>How can these aunts & uncles “interfere”? Are they paying? Are they just envious? You don’t owe them an explanation. Your parents are happy, and I would think that’s what matters. If you have to explain to anybody then tell them that you are coming to the land of the free. Coming to a country of boundless opportunity. Coming to a place where folks have risked their lives to enter. I can’t believe anybody needs to justify coming to America!</p>
<p>Obviously you and your parents thought about this when you considered your college education. Therefore you and your parents have reasons. Personally I think it is great you have the money and desire to experience another culture.</p>
<p>My H is from India. I have met many of his friends and relatives here (haven’t been to India yet, after decades). Also know of his friends and relatives who chose to stay in India or return there. Different people choose different lifestyles- a childhood friend of my H’s visited on business over the years while living and working in India after a US MS, his son came (with his Indian wife) for his MS and chose to work for a US firm- currently living in SE Asia but keeping their Midwest US house to return to in a couple of years. </p>
<p>Don’t worry about the relatives who are negative. Enjoy your US experiences. You will be able to keep in touch easily (aside from time zone differences). Those that don’t understand can’t interfere with you so don’t let them bother you and your parents. It is enough that your parents do and let you go away. Your parents and you differ from them- that is fine.</p>
<p>There are many aspects of American culture that could stand improvement, but when I read of all these kids who have to stand up to the scrutiny and justify themselves to innumerable aunts, uncles, cousins and neighbors, I’m thankful it’s not part of my American culture. It’s no one else’s business (other than your parents). </p>
<p>Get your deposit made and plane tickets purchased to head to school. That makes it harder for your parents to waffle later on.</p>
<p>Are the relatives expecting the younger relatives to be supporting them at some point and so they have an interest in their education/career path?
If I had the nerve I would ask them.</p>
<p>Say I want to move to the US (like me).</p>