I am going to my first ever college party this Friday night, and we will be dressing up for Halloween. It is being hosted by the men’s swim team in their off campus apartment. Since I have never been to a college party before, I am curious as to what they are like. Mainly I am wondering if they are more laid back or totally insane, if there is music and dancing, and what types of alcohol they mainly serve. I enjoy a lot of high end beer which I don’t expect to see there, but I am still wondering. I am walking over there with one of the guys from the team (I am a straight guy and so is he), so I won’t be alone. I also don’t plan on getting wasted, only decently buzzed. Anyway, is there also a way I can not be nervous/terrified? I tend to be that way around people I don’t know, and loud, crazy environments intimidate me, but I still want to experience this. Extreme nervousness tends to aggravate my stomach also, so I don’t want to not feel well that whole day as well as at night. And I actually want to go to the party. If I didn’t want to, I would’ve said no, so please don’t try and convince me not to.
What’s the problem here? Go to the party and have fun. Check out any creative costumes people manage to make out of limited stuff they brought to college. You are way over thinking this. And be sure to eat before you go to the party. That will make you feel calmer and stop you from getting too drunk.
I’m not overthinking anything. I am simply wondering what to expect since I have never been to a college party. Jesus. I said I’m going no matter what.
Lol “I am a straight guy and so is he”…how is this relevant to your question
Assuming you go in costume, try to pick something that isn’t insulting/making fun of an ethnic group or another culture. There has been trouble over that in recent years, and you want to steer clear of that. The only certainties arethat there will be alcohol and music. Beyond that, no telling for sure.
It’s not, but just in case people thought we were gay and going together or something.
@beachguy20 You’re radiating nervousness. You need to try and relax. Please don’t explain to anybody else but us that you’re straight. Your party will probably consist of cheap beer, floors sticky with cheap beer, music and because it is Halloween maybe candy. Why are you nervous? Can you psyche yourself up and picture yourself there for a manageable amount of time. i.e. I will go for an hour and have a great time.
Getting buzzed/tipsy should help you be less nervous.
Some thoughts & advice to consider:
First, just because you and a guy friend walk over to the party together doesn’t mean that people will assume that the 2 of you are gay. You’re basically each other’s “wing man.” When 2 girls go to a party together, people don’t assume that they’re gay, so it shouldn’t matter if 2 dudes show up together either. Don’t over think it.
Re: beverage choices:
I’ll be blunt here. Your average college party is going to be serving cheap beer that tastes lousy. The sole purpose of drinking it is to get drunk. Do not ever expect to be served higher-end beers unless you are fairly close friends with the party hosts and 1 of them offers you a premium beverage from their private stash.
Also, once the keg(s) run out, sometimes they pass the hat around to collect enough money to go out and buy another keg.
Eat dinner before you go. It will settle your stomach a bit and the booze won’t hit you quite as quickly if you are drinking with a not-empty stomach.
You’ll be fine. Have a great time!
Your question brings back memories. I was such a square that I hadn’t had a drink by my sophomore year in college. I went to a Halloween party that year and decided to try some rum punch (the drinking age was 18 back then, so I wasn’t doing anything illegal). I can still remember what the room looked like! Everybody thought it was hilarious that I had never had a drink in my life.
I’m not a huge partier, but I’ll try to answer your questions/ concerns off of my experiences. Natty Light has been the primary drink at the frat parties I’ve gone to. My track team hosts a lot, and we have a bar in the basement where you pay $5 and get access to whatever they have for the whole night - normally jungle juice, natty light, and cheap vodka. At the frat parties, its mostly drinking games and people hanging out, talking. The track parties are mostly dancing and hanging out with really loud music.
The intensity of the party really depends on your college. I go to a pretty nerdy school so parties are more low-key and casual. I’ve been to parties at two state schools and they’re a lot more lit and wild.
I’m an introvert, so I get nervous talking to people in party settings too. I gravitate towards drinking games, which give me a something to focus on and a group to immediately integrate into. It being Halloween is nice too - our track parties are always themed, which I like since I don’t agonize over being fashionable/ over-dressed. Google images and pinterest are good sources for ideas for costumes.
When I’m not playing games, I always hold a beer or red solo cup, even if it’s just water or I’m not actively drinking the beer. I think just having something for my hands to do and being able to hold something in front of my body is comforting psychologically.
I wouldn’t worry too much about having to talk to people the whole night - oftentimes the music is too loud to carry on a conversation, and if it’s quiet, most people are drunk/ buzzed so talking is pretty easy.
Overall, I guess my advice would be not to agonize over it. You have a friend to go with and a vague idea of what it’ll be like. Relax, and have fun! I started having so much more fun at parties when I focused more on having fun and being free than my image or what people thought of me.
If you find your self with anxiety like this often, maybe it is time to talk to someone at the Counseling center.