<p>I think that if it were my child (or sister, or best friend), I would want them to talk to a good counselor before making the leap.</p>
<p>Sometimes the nose is the problem, and the person will be happier with a new nose. Sometimes spending a ton of money and taking the risks of surgery won’t actually bring the emotional benefits the person expects. Talking to a non-judgmental expert who’s seen a lot of people go through the process can help you to figure out which category you may fall in.</p>
<p>I’ve thought about a nose job at times, but I’ve always come to the conclusion that my nose is nothing out of the ordinary, and if I don’t feel beautiful, it’s the inside of my head that needs work. But I also know people who benefited from surgery and have zero regrets. If you talk to a counselor about this and still feel sure that it’s right for you, then go ahead, and don’t let your parents’ potential disapproval control your decision.</p>
<p>I would totally support you if you were my child. You are an adult now. You’ve dealt with this for a very long time and have done your research and you’ve had a very long time to think about it. It is your nose and your life. This seems like a very specific, and well thought out decision on your part.</p>
<p>While we can collectively sigh at the plastic people coming out of hollywood these days, this is very different! To me it would be akin to your parents letting you have braces because of a tremendous overbite or wearing contacts instead of glasses. Sure one is surgery of course, which is serious, but the underlying principle is the same. Why would one be okay and the other not? I think sometimes we can get unfairly judgmental about how much others have assistance with their appearance since all of us do, to a degree. Even your intelligent, thoughtful parents likely dress in clean, modern clothes and enjoy getting their haircut; very few of us truly ‘don’t give a damn’ about physical appearances. It is just that some of us might need more help than others. </p>
<p>Maybe, and I hope, your parents will surprise you with their response (its quite common for parents to do that!). Moreover, while their initial reaction may not be what you want to hear, go into it knowing it may take them some time to get used to the idea (their first reaction may not be indicative of how they will feel after processing it, and learning more from you about it).</p>
<p>Tell your parents that you would like to come and sit down with them to discuss an important life-changing decision you are contemplating, and you really need to talk to them in person to get their support, even though you realize it may be difficult for them to accept. When they find out it is only a nose job, they will be so relieved that there will be no problem.
I’m only half kidding…I think my real advice is to tell your parents this matter-of-factly–that you’ve been thinking about it for a while, that you’ve done the research, and that you’re planning to go ahead with it in the near future. Then, with a smile, tell them that you felt they deserved the opportunity to tell you that you are already beautiful. If you present this to them as an adult decision you’ve made, they are more likely to repond supportively.</p>
<p>In the intense desire of some Jewish people for rhinoplasty, there lies a whole world of internalized anti-Semitism and exaltation of Northern European standards of beauty. Knowing intellectually that this is so doesn’t necessarily make the feeling go away, of course. As is demonstrated by the fact that I’ve disliked my own nose since adolescence.</p>
<p>my mother had a nose job when she was 16 and her parents were VERY supportive. My mother always cites this as one of the best decisions she could have made. She’s been much happier ever since</p>
<p>I love Hunt’s answer, and I also agree with Hannah that, especially at your age, counseling might be in order. In fact, some plastic surgeons require it. The last thing they want to do is start a series of perfection-seeking procedures. I’m not saying that’s what you’re doing, but hey, watch a couple of episodes of Dr Phil to see the train wrecks some people create. Best wishes. If this is a big deal to you, it won’t go away until you confront it head-on.</p>
<p>I had a nose job as a graduation gift after graduating from college. I am very fortunate that my parents were very supportive of me and willing to provide this gift. (I had a septoplasty along with the rhinoplasty, so insurance covered quite a bit of it too.) Like you, I had always hated my nose, starting when I first noticed it around age 10. While I come from a family that tends to have somewhat larger noses, I got the worst of the genes. Along with being too large for my face, my nose had an large hump and a pointed tip. Kids teased me about my nose growing up, and in college I would get the backhanded compliment that I was “pretty except for my nose.” I posted my picture on a few online forums as a seventeen-year-old, and the overly honest posters made nasty comments about my nose.</p>
<p>I went to one of the best surgeons in the country for my rhinoplasty, and I’m glad I did. The summer after college was also a great time for me to get it done, since I wasn’t doing anything and could recover. Be warned, your nose will look big and swollen for the first few months, and your nose won’t really start looking like the finished product for six months or so. Four years out, though, my nose looks great, and I have no regrets. I feel so much less self-conscious about going out and meeting people now.</p>
<p>My parents definitely aren’t the plastic surgery type, but they understood how important this had been to me for years. I would definitely talk to your parents; you might be surprised at how understanding they are.</p>
<p>Funny, this thread should come up right now. My son had a nose job recently that he did NOT want. Broke his nose, and did not get it set, and had to have it rebroken. Did it playing sports. He does not recommend the procedure if unnecessary. </p>
<p>It would be a decision for my child to make once s/he is an adult.</p>
<p>I had my ears pinned when I was 32 years old. I had been teased about how they stuck out since kindergarten and when the oppoprtunity came up, I did it. I haven’t regretted it yet. I used to look in the mirror and fixate on my ears- nobody else thought they stuck out, but that was the only thing I could see. I had the surgery and now when I look into the mirror, I see my whole face and it looks great.</p>
<p>Find a good surgeon and go for it. It doesn’t matter if your parents think your nose is big or not- it’s about what YOU see when you look in the mirror.</p>
<p>I broke my nose in elementary school - didn’t even know until later. Fortunately, that let me get an “insurance-paid” nose job to fix my recurring sinus infections with the side-effect of boosting my self-esteem. I’d say go for it!</p>
<p>When I was in jr high/hi school, there were a number of girls who got nose jobs and everybody was very supportive (and not all of the girls were Jewish…). One of my good guy friends got a nose job in college, although in my opinion he looked just fine with his original nose–this was part of his transformation along with getting contacts (he still looks great today!) My daughter’s nose is just fine, but I would certainly be supportive if she had thought she needed a nose job. My guess is that your parents will be understanding. But do find a good surgeon.</p>
<p>It’s your body. It doesn’t belong to your parents. Do as you wish with it. Do expect that your parents might be upset, but they’ll learn to live with it since it is important to you.</p>
<p>I don’t really know how nose jobs look these days. My friends now in their 50s who had them in their youth all seem to have the same pert, small nose that never looks quite as if it goes with the rest of them. I feel kind of sorry for them, actually. </p>
<p>Just be sure the nose job gives you a nose that is yours and not from a catalogue!</p>
<p>1) My wannabe Doctor D shadowed a plastic surgeon for a good deal of time. Start to finish on many patients. She was amazed at the difficulty of dealing with patients who came in with photos of move star faces and a desire to look like Jen or J-lo, or …you get the picture. OTOH, those that came in with a desire to improve their looks and let the doctor suggest work that flowed/meshed/matched with the rest of their face (and their age) had much a better satisfaction level. Daylight and dark, she says.</p>
<p>2) My D had (what to me was incredibly involved) jaw surgery to correct a serious malocclusion. It was so worth it. She smiles all the time.</p>
<p>Well, my D was afraid to tell me she wanted to join a sorority because she knew I disapproved of them, so I can imagine she would be hesitant to tell me she wanted cosmetic surgery also. It’s hard to predict, but I guess my reaction would depend on the specific case. If she had an obviously odd nose, I’m sure I would have noticed. If everyone thought she looked fine, but somehow she thought she needed to change her face, that would worry me. It would be very out of character. If she could explain her reasoning clearly, I might be convinced, but she knows I am a “this is the face/body/hair God gave me, so it’s good enough” kind of person.</p>
<p>It’s not your parents’ decision. You are the only one who has to walk around with that nose, and wonder what life would be like if it were smaller or straighter. Many of your decisions as a new adult will be different from what your parents would have chosen, but you can disagree and still have respect for each other. Do it, and don’t look back.</p>
<p>I had my nose done right after graduation from college. It made a big difference in how the world looked at me. The main thing was that I had been very shy, and the new nose was a huge confidence booster as I made my way into the work world. If it’s a significant change, you will get a lot more attention, good and bad, so be prepared for sudden insight into how shallow men can be. </p>
<p>My son is considering rhinoplasty at some point in his last two years of college; his nose was never great, but having it broken twice in the last eight months has made it much worse. I’d be interested in hearing about others who had the surgery done after mulltiple bad breaks.</p>
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