<p>DIL was a 28H when she was a young teenager. She’s now a 32DD/DDD – classic hourglass figure. She buys bras, blouses and jeans when she goes home to the UK for the better fit. </p>
<p>I’ll have to mention that to D.
She was ordering some things from Poland, but they were problematic to return.
It made a huge difference when I had a breast reduction & I would recommend it without hesitation. ( especially if you are done nursing) It not only makes finding clothing difficult, but it can affect your breathing and your activity level because sports bras can feel like an iron lung!</p>
<p>Let’s be clear, very slender, petite women can be very large breasted naturally. I am one such person and my daughters took after me. We wear bra sizes not found at Victoria Secret. </p>
<p>Ok…clarification: I am not concerned that Ms. Ellebud is going to a diet frenzy. She hasn’t worked out in a few weeks and so she is running again (about 30 minutes). She (and I) were outraged that another girl could react and start an obsession of weight loss My youngest has a tiny frame, the older small to medium.</p>
<p>Fang: you are correct. So many girls here have have the boob job…and although she wants them, in our family not a good idea. </p>
<p>Please note: If what I am to say offends…I get it…but here goes: We live in a time and place where looking good is the norm…between the kale and the plastics…girls and women who are average here would be stunners other places (per Mr. Ellebud). I am not saying that I am a stunner btw. As a young woman I was cute…but now I am a mom. I haven’t had work done yet…but I am going to soon. My oncologist mentioned that many of his female patients are divorced during therapy. With the stress of treatment and the not looking so good (and the probability that there were other issues) divorce is far too common
Both junior Ellebuds work in industries where you have to or should look good…men and women. .Does this mean that a chubby man or woman won’t work? Of course not, its just more difficult.</p>
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And here I thought i was the only who thought this! I go for the latter. 
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<p>I don’t look down on those who get boobs jobs or get touchs up and the like. If you’ve accepted your flaws and you have the means to get rid of them, do it. If you want to enhance yourself, do it. I’ve thought of getting one in the future; although, as I get older my body changes and I’m unsure if it’s even necessary with the way things are going. What’s most important is that you realize the limitations of your own body. Understand your body type. If you have an athletic build there is now way…NO WAY you will have thin, slender legs. Trust me. I’ve tried. If you’re naturally slender, you may have to work harder for a different look than a naturally athletically built body type. Understanding is key in my eyes. </p>
<p>Doesn’t sound like a place I would ever want to live. Possibly why BIL, who is in the “must look good” industry himself, went to Canada’s film industry rather than south to LA. D is a stunner, but in the world of “perfect” would be considered too top heavy, too large in the thighs and probably the wrong color. Blech.</p>
<p>So then Bevhills, maybe its the 40’s, 50’s - up women who are setting the tone for the 20’s and their body image? Maybe it’s those older women who are setting the standard - and a standard that is wrong to set??? </p>
<p>And is it looking “good” or looking “perfect”??? Does “good” = fit? skinny? dressed to the 9’s?? </p>
<p>I think that dressing for the occasion is the way to go. Working out? Work out clothes…Food shopping? Pants and sweater/shirt…etc. Looking good is NOT about skinny. (I went to high school with a girl who almost died from anorexia). When I was young designers went huge. A size 10 was a 4 back then…now, its the opposite.</p>
<p>Oh…and despite my mother’s rec that you never left home without lipstick on…I do (leave the house without lipstick). </p>
<p>And, please note: I get the snark. I just choose to ignore it.</p>
<p>ssea, not somewhere I’d want to live either. </p>
<p>When I was in high school, I was 130 lb give or take and 6’0". I was scary skinny (though didn’t look it because I had enough muscle from sports to not look like there was a problem) but constantly got compliments about how good I looked. (I had a health problem that was not an eating disorder- luckily I knew it wasn’t healthy to be that skinny and got help. I’m now a healthy weight 
) It’s sad to me that something blatantly unhealthy was praised by so many. </p>
<p>I think the entire entertainment industry bears a lot of the blame, as does certain media, Romani. D is in HS and knows one boy who’s anorexic and far too thin after being teased for being overweight in middle school. A recent school project he did was on "healthy eating’ though he rarely eats anything himself. It was sad to see because he’s a great kid and very good looking-he gets far more attention now that he is scrawny. Another friend of hers was anorexic in 6th grade. She has a large frame and will never be skinny but to her she was ugly. At age 12. It was heartbreaking.</p>
<p>The entertainment industry is full of people who have “work” when they already look better than the average good looking person thanks to the time and money to have personal trainers, home gyms and chefs who can whip up the perfect diet food at a moment’s notice. And the magazines are full of airbrushed figures of “perfect” looking women. </p>
<p>I’m no fan of Marilyn Monroe’s personal life, but of you look at her picture, she was much curvier than the waifs with the plastic surgery you see these days. Although I HAVE noticed a trend among SOME older actresses to go gray, let a few pounds creep on and are still managing to get jobs. Maybe the younger crowd will take note. </p>
<p>Matthew Mcconnehy lost 45 pounds to do the Buyers Club. Won an Oscar…Comment, "What do call an actress who loses 45 pounds? Working</p>
<p>Not my comment, I read.</p>
<p>It doesn’t help when medical personnel add to the madness. I know someone who went to drop-in clinic with walking pneumonia. She weighs just under 150 pounds at almost 6’ tall (perfectly healthy weight for a 16-year-old with an athletic build). The physician’s assistant looked at this poor, sick girl and said something like “You don’t look like you weigh that much!” Then implied that maybe being sick wasn’t all bad because you can lose a few pounds that way. I was fuming when I heard about it. </p>
<p>I think clothing stores contribute to the problem. My daughter is pretty normal sized. Not super-thin, full-busted and curvy. She finds that many stores that sell jeans, etc. put all the size zero stuff on the tables and lower shelves and the size 8 or whatever is high up on shelves. Once she was shopping and kept having to ask them to bring her size down – it’s a subtle message to the buyer when the tiny sizes are accessible and the larger ones are not. As the salesperson was bringing it down she said, “You know, it would save us both a lot of trouble if you actually kept the sizes that real women wear where they can reach them.” Not that real women aren’t a size zero, but a whole lot of real women are told that is the ideal by the way a store organizes clothes. </p>
<p>It can be a whole lot easier for a young woman to meet guys outside of SoCal because in other parts of the state and country guys have less expectation of being able to find a woman who fits some kind of perfect physical ideal. In some parts of the country a smart and nice woman is as datable as a woman with an ever-bikini-ready body.</p>
<p>I know this will sound sarcastic and it actually probably is, but are we really going to put the blame on the entertainment Industy or the clothing industry or whatever else is NOT something coming from a child/young adults themselves??! Pass the buck? Maybe my kids for the most part have really not been that influenced by media, peers notin their small circle, etc. I Just think we have to take more responsibility for setting a good example and helping our kids to be strong enough in mind and self worth to be able to look beyond the media and business industry to make their own personal decisions.</p>
<p>We have the look good circle here, Im sure it isnt as large as in LA, but in the socioeconomic level of the families at the kids private schools, there were a few trophy wives/husbands who then were traded in themselves when their partner " upgraded".
So glad not in that race, its not winnable.</p>
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They said WHAT? That is so rude. If I ever head a coworker say that I’d give them a talking. </p>
<p>I do work for a company that promotes an unhealthy body image. Our sizes are smaller than normal. I remember when I just started I felt pretty fat. I was normal weight, but I wasn’t stick thin and slender. After almost two years of being there I’m more than comfortable with my size in their clothes. Sure, I may not fit in to their bandeaus or be able to wear some of the shorts without showing “too much”, but it’s the clothes. It isn’t me. It’s unfortunate that the girls shopping there do not realize this. </p>
<p>There was one day a young girl was shopping with her mom. She had asked for either a 0 or a 1 in some jeans. She tried them on, they didn’t fit, and didn’t want to ask for a bigger size. I remember asking her if she would like another size and perhaps a different style. I even tried to show her the style I was wearing, but she burst into tears over the jeans. It was the most awkward and sad moments I’ve had working there.</p>
<p>No, it wasn’t the salesperson. It was my daughter who said it in a friendly way. She was obviously inconveniencing the person who kept having to climb a ladder and she was observing that the store could make it easier for everyone if they kept all sizes accessible to customers, not just the tiny sizes. </p>
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<p>I will not blame an industry for serious illnesses such as anorexia nervosa. However, when society sends messages to women about an ideal beauty and you combine that with the disordered thinking that accompanies anorexia, it exacerbates a serious problem.</p>
<p>Oh, goodness. Sorry, @mimk6. In my sudden rage, I misread what you wrote. 
I thought the salesperson said “You know, it would save us both a lot of trouble if you actually kept to the sizes that real women wear…”. Something to that effect. </p>
<p>Yes, that’s what I was getting at, mimk6. There’s so much time, money and effort put into these ideal looks-not women only, BTW, that anyone who’s already impressionable is going to think it’s confirmed by what they see in magazines, on TV and in ads an movies. It’s not just about anorexia. It’s about being perfectly coiffed, made up, thin, fit, etc. It’s about mother’s always being rested and the kids always being clean, the husbands always being clueless-so many untrue stereotypes out there. It’s certainly not unique to this time period-back in the early 1900’s wealthy women were getting trussed up in corsets to reach some ridiculous ideal of thin. </p>
<p>Abasket-lots of us work hard with our kids NOT to be susceptible to media ideals. There’s even a girls program here where the young people break down the lies in advertising to teen girls. But wouldn’t it be nice if we didn’t HAVE to watch for lies and false images? </p>