<p>I can’t seem to find my niche at college yet (I am an optimist; I know it will come eventually, I just need some guidance along the way). A lot of people I met are beer guzzling, sports mongering, outgoing loudmouths. I like to hang out with people who are chill and can talk about stuff without yelling and making a huge commotion. Most of the people at my high school were like this, but college is different because everyone wants to hang out with the hottest/tallest/richest/Xest person.</p>
<p>I am:
Introverted and Extroverted- I can learn how to program, solve complex calculus problems, and go into deep philosophical conversations. I can also hang out with friends, go to parties (and leave within 5 minutes due to boredom), and I am not shy at all.</p>
<p>Observant- I notice subtle behavior hints in people that tells me what kind of person they are and whether I would enjoy being with them or not. This is a blessing and a curse; I would rather be completely oblivious and excessively optimistic so I can hang out with everyone. For example, I realize that girls talk to attractive people differently than average people. They talk a lot more than just the standard instead of just the “Hi my name is _____ where do you live” and do things like laughingly talking about their funny experiences. I wish I was not so observant, but I am, and I hate it.</p>
<p>Open- I do not really hold any strong beliefs because I believe that many ideas contain a certain amount of truth. I can watch and enjoy critically acclaimed movies such as Pulp Fiction and the Shawshank Redemption, and I can go and watch an action movie for fun.</p>
<p>Some of us may like to have intellectual conversations and enjoy solving complex math problems, but the majority do not. These people exist, but honestly, talking about these things all the time will eventually get boring. Try to fit yourself in the grey area between the two extremes of the spectrum (the intellectual mind and the idle mind).</p>
<p>“I am:
Introverted and Extroverted- I can learn how to program, solve complex calculus problems, and go into deep philosophical conversations. I can also hang out with friends, go to parties (and leave within 5 minutes due to boredom), and I am not shy at all.”</p>
<p>NONE of this has ANYTHING to do with introversion and extroversion. Know what you’re saying before you say it.</p>
<p>it’s very interesting what danislost said, “find the stoners”</p>
<p>i myself am a ‘good’ kid in terms of the whole alcohol/illegal substances scenario. i don’t drink and don’t do illegal substances; i also pass little judgment on those who choose to. however, this past summer i was around people who dabbled in these activities more than the average norm and noticed that i actually enjoy the company of these people more than i do that of others. they’re very down to earth modest people and not once was i pressured to do anything i didn’t wish to. a lot of them have very interesting perceptions on life and reality.</p>
<p>i have found out that the problem is finding these people at college, especially when i myself don’t smoke or whatnot.</p>
<p>And to the TC, try the commuting students. Many of us simply don’t have time (nor the desire) to participate in all of those things you mentioned earlier. On top of that, at my school, many of the commuters seem to be older, more mature, sometimes with spouses and kids at home. Check your commuter lounge for starters, or contact your Commuting Students Organization (if your school has one) to find out the popular hangout spots for commuters.</p>
<p>I know exactly what you mean lollybo! I’ve been at school for 2 weeks know, and it feels like it’s just incredibly difficult to find genuine people.</p>
<p>Lollybo – It sounds like you’re overthinking it, and the more you do, the harder it will become to just find “chill” people. Also, be wary of these ‘hints’ you observe. You risk misreading (and therefore, misjudging) people or their opinions of you. I definitely don’t conform to the example you provide.</p>
<p>Worry less about this.</p>
<p>Join some ECs. Use the fact that your not shy to reach out to people (this doesn’t mean invite them to become your new best friend…just say hi when you’re given the chance).</p>
<p>Be less picky (for now, not necessarily in the long run. You’ll never meet people if you’re making snap-judgments).</p>
<p>Trust that this’ll work itself out and seek more advice if it doesn’t soon. The first few weeks are always awkward, whether or not you feel like you’re finding your niche.</p>
<p>Okay silverpebble, I’m not trying to insult what you’re saying or anything, but I just don’t follow. How do racial slurs have anything to do with misusing a word? Chill out and give the guy a break.</p>