who will go to a school because of a "special person"?

<p>Ok, I'll be the first to admit that if I get admitted to Cal and UCLA, even though LA is my first choice, I just might go to Cal for this girl.</p>

<p>Do not do that- what if she dumps you and gets a new boyfriend?</p>

<p>Take a chance on love. Even if it doesn't work out, Cal is a great school to be in.</p>

<p>Yea, I know...I took a chance on love lol..I've been with my bf since senior yr in HS and we both went to UCSB together. Were both trying to transfer now, because we both don't really like it here.</p>

<p>I won't base my entire decision on my "special person," but it'll sure be a factor that I would consider when making it. My boyfriend and I have been going so strong for over a year now, so it'll be a shame if something extremely small like distance come between us. Although, of course, I know our relationship can stand against the distance or whatever else that might come between us, and still work it out. It'll just be nice to be with him.</p>

<p>I might be a little embarrassed with my friends if I go to the same school with my boyfriend though.....</p>

<p>You said you would consider Cal just for this one girl... Is she at least your girlfriend? You didn't specify. The way you described her doesn't sound like you know for sure she's a keeper.</p>

<p>I was accepted into Cal last year but passed it up because I found love. Education is a journey, and in no way has my relationship curtailed my aspirations or intellect. In fact, I simply reapplied this year to all the UC's and she and I just got into UCSC, and I'm still waiting to hear back from other schools. I'd do it again.</p>

<p>Evaluate your situation--avoid falling into a skewed sense of idealism. </p>

<p>Realistically, what is the feasibility of this relationship? Do a risk assessment--what is the most you have to lose?</p>

<p>What are the:
- Short term benefits?
- Long term benefits?</p>

<p>Consider your choice to go to the same school she does an "investment". What is your return on your investment? Ultimately what do you hope to gain out of this relationship?</p>

<p>I've been on / off with a girl ever since we were in 8th grade (almost 20 years old now). If I hadn't asked myself these very objective questions, SD would have been my first choice, and I wouldn't have even tried to LA or Cal.</p>

<p>Here are my two very subjective arguments for this situation:</p>

<p>1) You're giving up your DREAM of going to UCLA for just ONE girl. As with any relationship, there's not much certainty, and you're willing to sacrifice everything you've been looking forward to at UCLA--the sun, the campus, the city life, the academia--for ONE girl--and you're still so young! You could stay free and explore yourself instead of being limited by just one person. Think about the constraints and limitations you'll inherently have in meeting new people because of your relationship. Is that really worth it? Isn't college a lot about networking? What about the emotional burden affecting your GPA? If you take one fall for her, what about the rest of your future decisions? Will you even be making another decision FOR YOURSELF, or are you always going to make choices based on other people?</p>

<p>2) Cal and UCLA are right on par with one another academically. She could be the one--why not take a risk and see what happens. You never know, this opportunity may never come again. You could harness the passion the two of you share and use it to make great personal and academic achievements. You'll have drive, and hope. You'll also have a solid support system instead of a bunch of acquaintances. Since you're spending less time socializing, you can focus your thoughts more and concentrate in classes. What's life without love?</p>

<p>I want to get into Cal because my ex is in SF</p>

<p>I kind of understand where a lot of you guys are coming from in this thread because I already went through somewhat of a similar experience.</p>

<p>I joined the AF right after high school (98). I had a girlfriend at the time and thought it would be no problem to get based only an hour from home which meant we could maintain our relationship. Well, the AF had other ideas about that and I ended up all over the place. I found out the hard way what my gf's true commitment to me was (aka: nothing). At first it sucked, but now it is obviously one of the greatest blessings that has ever happened to me.</p>

<p>So my advice to the people here facing a similar situation is to follow your dreams and aspirations and don't let anything hold you back. Everyone here is very young and the odds of you marrying that "special person" you're with now are next to zero. The last thing you want to do is look back and be kicking yourself for the rest of your life because you made a decision that wasn't best for you based on your heart (or other "area" if you will) and not your brain. Or, let's say you do end up staying with that "special person"...you don't want to hold resentment toward them later in life because they "kept" you from realizing your dreams.</p>

<p>So do what you've gotta do...for you and only you. The rest will fall into place and work out exactly how it is supposed to in the end.</p>

<p>Good luck!</p>

<p>no, she's not my gf. Can't go wrong with Cal though, right?
oh and the only reason why i prefer LA over Cal is that LA is closer to home, other than that i dont really care.</p>

<p>Will: I don't care if Helen of Troy walks in the room, that's game six!
Sean: Oh, Helen of Troy...
Will: Oh my God, and who are these **in' friends of yours they let you get away with that?
: Oh... They had to.
Will: W-w-w-what'd you say to them?
Sean: I just slid my ticket across the table and I said, "Sorry guys, I gotta see about a girl."
Will: I gotta go see about a girl?
Sean: Yeah.
Will: That's what you said? And they let you get away with that?
Sean: Oh yeah. They saw in my eyes that I meant it.
Will: You're kiddin' me.
Sean: No, I'm not kiddin' you, Will. That's why I'm not talkin' right now about some girl I saw at a bar twenty years ago and how I always regretted not going over and talking to her. I don't regret the 18 years I was married to Nancy. I don't regret the six years I had to give up counseling when she got sick. And I don't regret the last years when she got really sick. And I sure as hell don't regret missin' the damn game. That's regret.
Will: Wow... Woulda been nice to catch that game, though.
Sean: I didn't know Pudge was gonna hit a homer.</p>

<p>Well in that case... if you don't know her very well and it's just a case of infatuation, go to LA. UCLA's got a ton of hot girls and the boy/girl ratio is favorable for guys.<br>
If this girl is someone you've known for a long time and your devotion to her is based more on superficial attraction, go to Cal.</p>

<p>I'm in a similar spot. My ex-bf told me that if I go to UCSD (where he is) then he wants to get back together. We broke up because of distance, so he sees me coming as an opportunity to regain lost time.</p>

<p>He will most definitely NOT factor into my decision. He's just a kid, he doesn't know what he really wants. He wnats to be with me for more immediate satisfaction, not because he wants a deep, romantic connection. Sure, you can fall in love, but things change at this age.</p>

<p>Heck, I even forgot about his offer until I read this thread. Sure, it would be great to go back with him and we'd be the iconic couple out of our friends again. But if/when it doesn't work out, I KNOW I will link him to my decision to attend UCSD.</p>

<p>Love is fleeting. You can always find a new one (as hard as that is to believe, at times). But your education, you can't erase. If he/she is the one, then you'll end up with them no matter what.</p>

<p>Alansda, that has to be one of my favorite movies.</p>

<p>alansada -- as romantic as that line is, it is comparing a baseball game (that was awesome) to your education (that is priceless).</p>

<p>Not Meeeeeeeeee</p>

<p>never go to a school because of a girl man. thats the worst thing you could do. be your own man and do what you want to.</p>

<p>samus- are you prospective UCI math right? lol good luck finding hot guys in that department. If i decide to stay, I'll be in the engineering building next door. ;) </p>

<p>i think there are more girls and boy at all the UC's or even in school in general, but no good ones at uci.</p>

<p>my bf is a factor to my decision. I wanna go to UCB because we both live in SF. I don't want to be away from him so far. If I get into UCB, he can drive to see me in UCB anytime and vice versa. But if I don't get in, and have to go to UCLA or UCSD, I'm just scared the distance will hurt our relationship. He's also very scared I will find someone else at the UC</p>

<p>I just hope I got in UCB (econ)....even though UCLA (biz-econ) is a better choice in terms of major for me</p>

<p>so he's the jealous type i see.</p>