I could ask about anything and some bitter person will come along and treat me like I’m an idiot who hasn’t done any research on the admissions process just because I’m a student. Any other high schoolers have this problem? It mostly seems to be with mothers.
Yes, this has happened to me and i have seen it happen to others. I also feel like I have to put 1000 disclaimers on everything, to ensure someone doesn’t accuse me of being arrogant or ignorant about the process. I would just avoid the “What are my chances?” forum because that is where I see most of the unhelpful, frustrated comments. That’s not to say i’m perfect, but I just recommend that we all either answer the question to the best of our abilities or skip it.
This is a public forum and anyone can post what they want- so no poster represents the opinion of anyone but him/herself. Some posters get irritated if someone asks a question that can easily be answered by searching the site here or Google.
For any question you post, you can take the information that is useful out of the answers, keeping in mind that some may be hard to read, but still good advise. On a chance thread, if the chances are slim, people will say it. Also check the advice along with your own research. In general, there is a lot of good advice here- and people willing to advise.
This is exactly what I’m talking about. I know anyone CAN say whatever they want (the middle school “free speech” argand sometimes it’s true but I’m not skipping around asking stupid questions. I’m asking questions that I have searched high and low for the answer to. I don’t think it’s really that hard to be nice even if you are irritated. Most of the people on this website are either adults or are about to become adults; is it really so hard to not be a jerk?
It’s good for you to ask questions; how else will you know what to do and whom to ask for more information? I think people are jerks, including myself, because even when a question is answered, the poster doesn’t like the response and then continues to try to get around the issue/ response by asking “what if?” or that their “situation is different and doesn’t apply” to the answer.
That’s when people start to become annoyed. If they continue to post in 10 different places with the same question, then that’s when we become jerks. Sorry for that.
I read some of the responses to your posts, and I saw some helpful information. I didn’t see anyone knocking what you said.
Most people on this site provide helpful information.
Please read the Terms of Service - <a href=“http://auth.collegeconfidential.com/module.php/hobsonspolicies/policy.php?policy=tos”>http://auth.collegeconfidential.com/module.php/hobsonspolicies/policy.php?policy=tos</a>
If you feel that someone has violated any part of the TOS, click on “Flag” and then “Report.” A moderator will review your report to see if any action should be taken.
If someone is being honest and not insulting, that does not count as a TOS violation. At times, you will get answers you don’t like!
I’ve found the vast majority of members here to be nothing but helpful. Sometimes members get frustrated, and rightly so, when they’ve crafted a well organized response to a question that the OP clearly does not want to hear, and the OP respins the question another way. This is often the case when the OP does not have the stats and/or the money to go to his/her dream school, and the member is trying to be helpful and suggest alternatives.
Not that any of this applies to you; I’ve read your posts, and have seen nothing condescending on them. I agree with the above: stay out of the What Are My Chances forum.
A large percentage of members are parents who have been down this road before. Their wisdom is invaluable. They are on here often because they are looking for options for their 2nd, 3rd kid, and are graciously giving their knowledge for free.
Best of luck in your search.
I AM baffled, OP, because I looked at every one of the threads you started, and I see only courteous, thoughtful responses to your questions. Which posts did you think were condescending?
Hi OP-
Sorry that your experience has not been positive. Some of it can be chalked up to the difficulty of communicating with vast amounts of different people via written word. Many times things come across as harsh that were really only meant as informative. Like the others posters above me suggested, take the helpful information and discard the rest.
As an aside, just because someone says they have a son or daughter doesn’t mean they are a bitter mother. There are plenty of fathers that post on this board as well : - )
Again, where are the condescending replies the OP got??
@Mainelonghorn She may have just looked at threads with people being rude…I have seen many cases the OP is talking about by just going through different threads not necessarily my own.
Additionally, on the points the OP is talking about, I very much agree. For example, people who are new to the thread may not know where to look for certain information that might be “easy to find” or it may be just simply much less time consuming to create a thread and someone who knows can just answer. This is why I get annoyed every time I see someone getting scolded for this when it can be much more time efficient to make a new thread.
I am a long time lurker and a recent poster, here are my observations, a lot of the high schools students are generally supportive and helpful because they too are discovering this information within the last few months unless they are super pro-active. There are a lot of parents on the other hand that are very rude/distasteful and chalk it up to being sarcastic. There are some students that do the same but in general its the parents that have experience with the college process because one or two of their children already finished it previously, but as College Applications become more and more competitive I think advice older than one or two years is outdated.I see several parents who go on Chance threads and tell students they have 0% chance of getting into a school because they arent a URM or they have no hook… They also say that some students are entitled and spoiled because their parents are wealthy… I’ve seen it happen several times otherwise I wouldn’t give these specific examples. Generally if you ask another student I think your response should be pretty positive on WAMC and College Admissions. But as @bjdkin not all the parents are bad either, it really is a minority of the CC population that bring it the bad name you see on the news or other forums. Stay out of WAMC and you should encounter a lot less condescension.
From Terms of Service:
From MaineLonghorn (above):
Many posters, even “honest” ones, sumbit posts that denigrate or insult the value/rigor/worthiness of schools I like. There are many of these posters and posts, and they can make me uncomfortable. Per terms of the TOS, should I forward all of these to the Mods? My point: “uncomfortable” is very low low bar to violations of TOS. Even discussing this makes me uncomfortable, so I feel I now should self-report. . . .
I do find it interesting that about 95% of the time, when someone posts about horrible people are, he or she has NEVER submitted a single report of a post. Moderators can’t do anything if we don’t know about problems.
If there is a particular poster who drives you nuts, you can always put him on “Ignore.” I have done that myself!
You can report posts that make you uncomfortable. I know I have felt uncomfortable with some posters responses, but to me there is a line between uncomfortable and a violation- even if that is variable from person to person. Some threads can take an uncomfortable path, and eventually if it goes too far, a moderator will close it.
I see CC as an informative site, not just for college admissions, but to get a view of the wide range of ideas and opinions out there. I favor free speech, and so would not want too much regulation of what can be said on this site.
On the whole, most people are helpful and informative. Take advice in context of what you know as well as the different posters. I would not sacrifice the free flow of speech here as it goes with information. The moderators do a great job of not letting it get too far.
Students need to learn the difference between directness and a condescending attitude. When you start your first “real” job after college, your employers expects you to be on-the-ball immediately. They understand that you won’t know everything, but you do need to figure things out on your own and ask questions of them only after you have researched them on your own and don’t know how to proceed. As a new structural engineer, I got yelled at more than once! One time, for drawing sketches at 0.20 inches to a foot rather than 0.25 inches to a foot!
When you ask, “Can I get into this school?” and someone answers, “Not with that GPA!” that is direct, not rude. Would you rather they say, “Oh, sweetheart, of course you can get in! You’re so special!” Now THAT would be condescending.
I’m confused…@sarahelicox was clearly speaking in first person. As if she was having issues with other CC members. But she just joined yesterday…maybe this is a new screen name for her & had issues with her old one?
Her profile shows that the OP registered in August, 2012.
I have noted quite a few comments that are poorly-disguised put-downs. Reminds me of kids in middle school. Every once in a while it’s deserved. But the best advice is to just ignore them.