I started college a few weeks ago and fortunately coming in I already knew a bunch of people due to a pre-orientation program. I have been social these past few weeks, but now I’m starting to get annoyed with my friends. It’s not that their doing anything wrong I just find them annoying. Like last night one of my friends wanted to go back to our dorm(we live in the same building), but she was like “If you don’t want to leave I’ll just wait for you because I do not want to walk alone.” After hearing that I felt obligated then to leave. While we were walking they asked me a couple of times are you fine and I was like “I don’t really care.”(because honestly I didn’t care that I couldn’t stay out longer, I was just annoyed that they couldn’t just walk themselves back to the dorm.) That bothered me because by that person saying that,it felt like that basically meant we had to leave now or else that person was going to be doing something(staying out later) that they did not want to do. I guess that example basically sums up why my friends annoy me. It’s because I don’t always feel like I’m doing what I’m want to do. It’s always what someone else wants to do, and if I object then they end up either doing something they do not want to do or getting upset. And that is so freaking annoying.
Another thing that annoys me about my friends is how some of them will sulk when something does not go there way. And instead of voicing out what’s wrong they just act all upset/depressed/ ruin the mood and it’s annoying. Like can you just say what is wrong/be honest, and stop being so dramatic. I feel guilty for saying that, but that’'s how I really feel. Why is this? Is this a bad way to be feeling? Also, in high school I was not as social so I’m not used to these kind of situations.
Sorry for that bad grammar and sorry if I sound like a b****
Please help because this really bothers me.
You’ve only known these people for a few weeks. Don’t feel like you are locked into friendships with them. It’s perfectly fine - even preferable - to expand your friend circle. Get to know other people based on common interests and personality instead of just proximity.
This is a great question and one that can best be answered by studying/thinking about what it means to be a “friend”.
I’m not being snarky either. It’s a concept where you will want to consider what is important to you and what you value in friendships.
IMHO, in the best friendships there is some give and take. It’s OK to be vulnerable to a certain extent (though I don’t feel qualified to handle deep psychological issues of other people). It’s OK to be direct when necessary (though gentle). It’s OK to have your own needs too.
Just some thoughts for you . . .
@SouthFloridaMom9 if you’re suggesting that by walking with my friend instead of having them walk alone I lessened the chance of someone harming them/something bad happening, I get that. Thanks for sharing your thoughts
^^no, I didn’t mean that at all. My comments were more general in nature. Really only you can figure out what is reasonable for you within the context of friendships. I just wanted to encourage you to think about it on a deeper level. I wish I had done that more at your age.
It really is OK for you to have your own needs and feelings too, imho.
Your first responsibility is towards yourself. Don’t let others guilt trip you into doing something you don’t want to. At the same time, something you have to keep in mind is that people aren’t perfect. You’re never going to find a friend that isn’t annoying/depressed/b****y sometimes.
My kids (one in HS, one in college) and their friends use that word a lot – annoying. They use it to describe when someone is behaving in a way they don’t like, or saying things they don’t like or agree with. And I’m not talking about major things, like acting violent or being rude and nasty. Just if it’s something that they, my kids, would not do or say based on their personality and temperament. I am wondering if this “annoying” thing is generational. This is something I’ve actually been thinking about lately.
Maybe its because families are smaller these days? Growing up with many siblings, I was quite used to annoying. It didn’t phase me much. 
I think you are amplifying a trivial situation into a problem in terms of the walk home incident. Some people feel stressed out starting college and it takes them awhile to settle out. Be patient. It is better to be the solid friend than the hypersensitive friend.
@doschicos I don’t know. I grew up in a small family, same size family I have now as a parent. The current HS/college generation uses the word “annoying” a lot. Everything little thing is annoying. There are a lot of nuisances in life. But you just have to cut out the noise.
To the OP: If you want friends, you have to tolerate differences. Nobody ever will overlap 100% with your personality, temperament, wishes, and desires. It’s part of learning to live with people.