This is fascinating. Moreover, these speech pattern have now been exported into many foreign languages including German, French, Italian and even Arabic and Hebrew. God Help!
@marvin100 eloquence and vocabulary are critical in many professional settings. These speech patterns could bevy immaturity, insecurity and a casual attitude that is unprofessional and undermines the speaker no matter how smart he/she may be.
I find it distracting when I’m attending a business seminar OR when I’m just having a casual conversation with someone and the speaker uses “like” or “um” constantly. Maybe the person is very bright, but it’s still distracting. I don’t think it’s a bad idea to teach our kids to communicate more effectively and not use fillers.
Most of my fellow profs would happily put up with annoying speech patterns if the students arrived knowing how to write an essay with reasonable grammar and spelling, and a structure or a line of sight through it.
I noticed this problem started with my kids about 2 years ago and quickly within a week after noticing it, had them correct themselves. Each time they did it, I’d make them repeat their sentence correctly. Many of their friends at school are prone to use the occasional unnecessary ‘like’.
I think parents really are the ones that have to be held accountable to be their help, I wouldn’t leave it to the school; I see schools as a help for these personal traits.
I wanted to add another annoying thing to add to this thread, it is the starting of a sentence with ‘so’. My manager’s boss can’t start a sentence without the word ‘so’ and at first it was laughable, but now it’s quite miserable that for so many years he still doesn’t see a problem with it.
When one of my daughters was in highschool, her constant use of the word “like” was irritating me. It continued for several months despite my occasional comments warning her that the habit was very distracting to anyone conversing with her. Finally, I started to count the “likes” out loud when we were engaged in conversations at home (never in public or in front of friends). She was not appreciative and actually became very angry with me. But the counting did finally make her realize how often she was using that word and she quit doing so.
Our minister got in the habit of using the word “ultimately” so much that our family began adding them up during sermons. The record was over 40 times one week. I was appalled when one of my daughter’s told me they had laughed about the overuse with the pastor’s daughter! Beginning with the next sermon, “ultimately” was no more frequently used than any other synonym of ultimately.
These insertions aren’t just exported. Many came to us as imports, patterns from other languages, the variety in our peoples.
Yes, some make one seem lesser. But I think we should each be aware of our own patterns, not just point fingers.
I have had uptalk and whatnot explained to me umpteen times and I still can’t hear it.
It is, indeed, a gender issue. You are right that both male and female students use uptalk and conversation fillers (“like”). In fact, the research on whether women use uptalk more than men is inconclusive. But the mannerisms are more often attributed to women (you did it yourself in your first post, with the reference to “Barbie dolls”) and women are disproportionately penalized for these speech behaviors. There’s lots of emerging research on this.
One might suggest that people who perceive uptalk as less professional or “inane” might want to explore their own reasons for believing that way, rather than putting the onus on the speaker to speak differently. After all, there’s no indication that uptalk is associated with less intelligence or lower capability. However, linguistics researchers have consistently found that certain linguistic traits and speech patterns associated with women are assigned negative attributes without any actual evidence.
There’s a [good Slate article](Uptalk is OK: Young women shouldn't have to talk like men to be taken seriously.) on this.
I had a teacher 40 years ago who said “okay” as his space filler. It was a total joke in the class. We just sat around and counted the times he said it instead of listening to anything he presented.
I too killed the habit with my kids by repeating “like” after every time they said it. Didn’t take very long actually but it did make them mad for a bit. Worth it.
Another annoying speech habit is the constant tongue click/lip smacking. Anyone else hear it lately?
Blah, blah, tsk, blah blah blah, tsk , Drives me nuts! They got rid of um,er and like and inserted a tongue click.
Sniffing.
I know some who sniffle between phrases.
I’m seeing the beginnings of a fabulous musical in this thread, “My Fair Student.”
@juillet I am not at all saying that uptalk, so and like are signs of less intelligence. Very highly educated folks use it all the time. But it detracts from
their eloquence. It also imposes a burden on the listener to constantly nod or say yes to affirmative statements. It comes across as insecure. If somebody says I was born in France and ends thisnstament with a questions mark, why do I then need to say yes or nod ? Very annoying.
You know what else puts a burden on people? Having posts that are chopped up and difficult to read.
You don’t have to nod back.
That’s your behavior, your choice.
@lookingforward: “You don’t have to nod back.That’s your behavior, your choice.”
Interesting, but perhaps not. The way we use language can manipulate a response in others, leading them to certain actions which seems purposeful and done on-purpose, but which are actually just reflexive. Notice the way the body responds to a "low talker,"or to someone who punctuates nearly everything with “ya know?”
There are those who begin sentences with the persuasive, all-inclusive, “We all know/everyone knows/you know how…” and I have seen where the listener, even when they do not “know,” or do not agree at all with the premise, nod in affirmation or assent, suggesting listener and speaker are of one mind.
In Toastmasters they call “like” and “um” filler words used by those uncomfortable with silence. In toastmaster classes they suggest not saying anything. One of the first exercises in the class is to give a speech and the audiences counts the “likes” and “ums.”
I the past few years I’ve noticed “sort of” inserted before all kinds of words. I hear it on NPR a lot. I wonder where these society-wide verbal tics originate–it’s interesting.
Increasingly noticing “likes” in writing, especially email and people starting sentencing with “so,”