<p>Older daughter does have her license and used her roommates cars. One roommate even taught her to drive a stick!</p>
<p>Younger daughter has ADD combined with a risk taking personality. Doesn’t have her license yet, although I am looking for a private program to use this summer in her college town.</p>
<p>While I was growing up it was unheard of for teens not to have their license, & I think it is an important skill to have, I also think that it is ok not to drive till you are ready.</p>
<p>If we didn’t consider driving to be such an important indicator of independence perhaps we would have a lower accident rate. (not thinking only of young people)</p>
<p>Thanks for posting that Emeraldkitty. My ADHD D totaled the car 7 houses from ours when she drove head first into a parked car that wasn’t usually parked there (her meds hadn’t kicked in yet and she was running over material for an exam in her head.) She was going so slow that the air bags didn’t deploy, thank goodness. </p>
<p>Oh I totally don’t do driver’s training; it’s not good for anyone! Apparently I am world class at using the passenger side brake and the “oh s^%t” handle above the window.</p>
<p>That’s what DH & the driving school are for…</p>
<p>I thought teaching my daughter to drive in Dallas with our (at the time) large SUV would be a piece of cake since she was a girl and not much of a risk taker. Wrong. It was awful. The car was too big for her and I thought the mailboxes on the passenger side were coming through the window. I yelled a lot and she hated the whole thing. My husband did better with it. Frankly, I didn’t think my daughter was very good at driving for awhile. She just didn’t seem to have the coordination that I expected.</p>
<p>On the other hand, WildChild was at boarding school and didn’t seem all that interested in driving. What we discovered after he returned home was that he taught himself by taking our cars out in the middle of the night. Lovely. He was quite a risk-taker, and before all was said and done he totaled two of our cars. Long story. I don’t know how I made it through some of those years.</p>
<p>I think everyone shouldmhave basic driving skills, and be able to use one in a crisis. Not that t hey are driving all the time, but having the knowledge is important. Lady across street from me never learned to drive. She has four kids. H is military. Her mom is older and has to drive d everywhere. One day mom won’t be able to drive then d will have a problem. </p>
<p>My d finally got her license when she got her job. She doesn’t need it for work, necessarily, but having the extra common skill is a plus.</p>
<p>In some places, you could go your whole life and never need to drive. In others, you won’t be going many places if you can’t drive, or you will be dependent upon others as described in post 8, which I find rather odd. </p>
<p>We live in an area where you pretty much have to drive. If my kids are leaving the nest at 18, then they needed to be driving several years before that as practice is essential. Not all kids would necessarily be ready. We didn’t however, just give them the green light to go wherever they wanted once they got their licenses. With D1, she had to drive for 6 months on nothing but city streets before she was ever allowed to progress to a highway. With D2, it was apparent to me that she needed more practice. She didn’t take her license test until we felt she was safe on city streets, even though she had already turned 16. Once she did pass her test, she was told no highways indefinitely. Recently, DH has been driving with her on highways to assure himself that she is ready. Even so, there are certain highways which we have told her to try to avoid, and she willingly does so. Even I avoid those highways when I can.</p>
<p>She will be taking her car to college, but DH will ride with her on the way there (6 hour drive), and I don’t forsee her driving to and from home for breaks. It’s a very easy flight and not pricey at all with SW, so once again she will mainly be driving city streets rather than expressways.</p>
<p>It’s a process rather than an event. But certainly, statistics are frightening, and this is something that probably always weighs on a parent. To this day, when I leave my parents’ house to drive home (45 minutes on highway), my Dad tells me to call when I get home so they know I’m okay. :rolleyes:</p>
<p>My oldest got use of our second car as soon as he could drive since he had early morning (4:30 AM) practice in high school and I was just too beat to continue the driving with 4 younger kids in the house. He did fine until he hit 21, then had a number of accidents in one year, including totaling my car and the cop car he hit. We then got sued for a million bucks by the crooked cop. Long story, but that’s what it was in a nutshell. Though we won the case, no thanks to the idiot lawyers the insurance company had, our reward was to be dropped by our insurance, and we became high risk. We can only get the state sponsored insurance which costs a fortune. So we drive a paid for, beat up old car, carry minimum insurance and have only the one car. Our subsequent kids were told that they get a car when they can buy it themselves and pay for their own insurance, because we were done with that. No more water out of this stone.</p>
<p>One kid who worked 3 jobs each summer and gave swim lessons during the year, saved enough to buy his own car and pays his own insurance, which motivated his brother to do the same. I don’t like it, but it’s their money and they are living within the rules we set down.</p>
<p>I started driving as soon as I was big enough to reach the pedals (which at 6’0" now was pretty young). My parents let me drive on the back roads up north and therefore I wasn’t really a “new” driver at 15 when I got my permit. I was more than ready and was given a car. I totaled that one in an ice storm last year. I bought my own car after that and then was hit again by a woman in her 50s who dropped her phone and ran a red light (are you f***ing kidding me?! grumble). That nearly totaled my car, but a month of repairs later and it was good as new (and considering that it’s a 2010, I would hope so…).</p>
<p>My sister on the other hand, was NOT ready for her license (and IMO, still isn’t at almost 26). She failed the exam at least 3 times that I remember, twice never making it out of the parking lot. She totaled at least 2 cars and her newest car is pretty beaten up. My dad has always offered to pay our insurance, and has, but after the second totaled car he had to draw the line considering our insurance tripled. </p>
<p>There are some people that just aren’t ready. Unfortunately, I lost a friend last summer that everyone knew wasn’t ready for his license. Nobody would drive with him because he was a scary driver and one night he was speeding, lost control, and died instantly when he hit a tree. Tragic, but nobody was really surprised.</p>
<p>My older one on her first drive with my wife drove 35 yards out of our drive way at 5 mph and totaled the Ford Escort by driving the hood right under the truck on the corner. We got $1,700 for the car from the insurance company, and bought the same car for $1,200.</p>
<p>Flash forward seven years. She bought her first car. An old Honda wagon. Slowly slammed into a car in front of her on a wet heavy on first long trip. Car in front had a couple of scrapes. Hers had the whole front end bent up.</p>
<p>Moral of story. Stick with old cars. Alternatively, buy a surplus tank.</p>
<p>“If we didn’t consider driving to be such an important indicator of independence perhaps we would have a lower accident rate.”</p>
<p>Yes, it is a symbol of independence. However, I also think that peer pressure it an important factor. Fortunately my (non-adhd) S went to a college where it was such a burden to have a car that it never entered his mind to buy one. Very few students owned a car. The public transport was excellent. So why bother? In such an environment peer pressure in relation to cars is a non-issue. When selecting colleges we never included this in our thinking. It was a huge bonus though.</p>
<p>My daughter lives in NYC, so having a car is not really an option, however, having a license is important. Her job is there, but what if she is transferred? It’s not about owning a car, it’s about being able to drive one if you had to. Say there was a medical emergency, an evacuation, whatever. My daughter may never own a car, but having that license is important. I didn’t push her to get it, she wanted it, but she was right.</p>
<p>We’re going thru this right now. A new car for DD1 has been ordered (2012 Honda Fit - ordered to make sure we get the school color) and DD1 will be doing formal Driver’s Ed in May, then test, then practice with me in June-Aug, then the car goes with her OOS a few hours away (I’ll drive it there :)). Thankfully, the Turbos are experienced with small cars so it’s not a big cultural shock. </p>
<p>The car in itself is another manifestation of over-protectiveness. DD1’s ‘off-campus’ apartment is literally across the street from campus, but Mrs. Turbo had dire images of starvation unless transportation to civilization (Costco) could be procured…</p>
<p>DD2 has already decided on a Scion IQ when she turns 16 in a couple years…</p>
<p>Those who live in cities with public transportation have this choice. Many of us don’t. If our teens don’t drive themselves they either don’t participate in ECs or a parent must devote many hours not on the job because of driving duties. Then come jobs and internships … Was I supposed to leave the younger kids asleep at home to go pick up the teen after work at the movies? Tell him he couldn’t have a job? Drag the second grader out of bed at 10 to drive 20 minutes each way so her brother could learn some job responsibilities?</p>
<p>Cross posted a few back so it doesn’t make the right argument.</p>
<p>Surprisingly, and regrettably, that behaviour is less rare than we all might hope (experienced in that regard here). Any parents of “almost ready to drive” teens should take note. Sometimes its quite a pain in the butt to be a parent…not to mention the perpetual pain in the wallet. At least the gratitude we receive makes it all worthwhile though. :)</p>
<p>I didn’t start driving until I was in my early 20s and could afford to pay for everything, car, insurance, etc. And that is also when I started feeling comfortable with driving. It seemed very scary to me, but I grew up in a city filled with very aggressive drivers. so driving wasn’t as necessary since there is public transportation there. Where I live there is none and no taxis either. But that doesn’t mean I think teenagers should be driving.</p>
<p>Unless you are very close to a person with a car, who is now unable to use it,but would let you do so, being able to drive and not have a car is useless in an evacuation or medical emergency. ( will learn how to quote later).</p>