<p>“Payroll and income taxes are higher, but still leave a higher after-tax income. Other things like costlier housing and more expensive tastes are voluntary expenses. It is not like anyone is forcing you to spend every last dollar of your high after-tax income.”</p>
<p>I think you’re missing the premise of your thread. If you need to downscale your tastes and voluntary expenses in order to pay for other things you consider necessary (like college), you probably don’t feel rich. If you can maintain your lifestyle and still afford the things you consider important…and have money left over, you stand a greater chance of feeling rich. Having to downscale to afford other important things wouldn’t make many people feel rich, no matter their income.</p>
<p>Perhaps the word “rich” is the problem. This thread would be more accurate if the words, “well off” or, “comfortable”
were substituted for the word, “rich”.</p>
<p>The first time Mr. Ellebud realized that his family was “rich” was when he started college. He didn’t grow up here. He knew that there were people who had smaller homes and some had larger homes, but the rest…he didn’t know. </p>
<p>“We have made many decisions along the way that have put us on that “above average couple” chart in the article linked in post #35. Do we feel rich? Right now, no. One mistake we made in moving to our current location was assuming that even though the public schools here are grossly underfunded and underperforming there would be good private options. That turned out not to be true for our particular student, so we opted for a very expensive boarding school that has consumed all of our disposable income for the past four years. Should anyone feel sorry for us? No, and that’s not the point. I’m saying that even if you end up on that chart, you can end up not feeling rich based on decisions you make – and it’s very important to understand that once you are fortunate enough to have more than subsistence income, your choices will dictate where you end up on the wealth scale.”</p>
<p>I echo that. People are not crying poverty, they aren’t asking for sympathy. Their financial reality reflects the choices in their lives. I never understand why people equate this with people complaining and asking for sympathy. </p>
<p>If we hadn’t spent over a million dollars over the years on private schools for our kids (the pain stops in a year and a half), and had invested it, it would be enough at this point to make me feel rich. But my kids have had the best possible environment to grow up in, and I can’t regret it for a minute.</p>
<p>I guess my take on this is that if you do things that (at least on a global basis) only rich people can do, you are rich. This includes (for example) sending your kids to private schools for any part of their education, owning a home, expecting to retire, etc.</p>
<p>Busdriver11, you were complaining. A lot. When there was talk about raising taxes on incomes above $250,000, you were so upset. The calamity… Taxes were raised. How are you doing? Has disaster been avoided?</p>
<p>When D was in Costa Rica, she got such a severe ear infection while she was in the jungle doing research, that they were going to fly her out.
When she recieved treatment, it was no charge because they have universal health care.
She stayed to live with a family for a few weeks and to participate in an immersion program, and was struck by the fact that the family she was living with had a much larger and nicer house than we did.</p>
<p>( even when she was living in India, she had to share her European style bathroom with only one other person, as compared to the house she was raised in. )</p>
<p>I think you didn’t listen very closely to me, dstark. My complaint has never been about taxes being raised (as long as it isn’t outrageous). My complaint has always been about demonization of people making over a certain income, and saying those people are, “not paying their fair share”. We survived, we paid about an additional 4K in taxes. Disaster was avoided because we were able to pay our tax bill by using our HELOC. Maybe that should be my new definition of rich, having enough money available at tax time to not have to borrow to pay for it.</p>
<p>Maybe, or maybe they think if they were to admit they are rich, it might sound rather crass. I don’t recall ever talking to anyone about whether or not I consider myself rich. Does this come up often when people get together?</p>
<p>I don’t recall ever talking to anyone about whether or not I consider myself rich. Does this come up often when people get together?*</p>
<p>Not really.
(Although I do note in my head, how often my friends fly, which is often several times a year at least for short vacations or to see family.
I’ve flown 5 times in my life, including a trip when I was 3 with my mother to see relatives in the Midwest, and again with her to see my brother graduate college when he was stationed in Colorado.)</p>
<p>I do have friends who are fairly well off, ( but not enough to retire early unless they downsized), who were really puzzled and concerned about how my D got along in India for so long when she was only 18.
( This was after reading a bookgroup book set in the period of the Emergency)
She really didn’t believe me when I told her D loved it & wanted to go back soon.</p>
<p>If we haven’t had direct experience with the culture, it’s easy to place more importance on superficial aspects and assume in comparison, theirs is wanting.</p>
<p>Okay, but relative to the thread, how are we making generalizations like these if it’s not coming up in conversations somehow? As in, people are afraid if they admit they are rich, they will become targets. How will they become targets if they are not actually saying this to anyone except in an anonymous message board?</p>
<p>“The expense of cars, washers, dryers, computers, etc…is pretty irrelevant to us…not that we buy things that we don’t need, but when we need them we buy them without having to worry about the cost. I feel very fortunate to be in that position.”</p>
<p>I don’t “worry about the cost” in the sense that I’m not about to go without a dryer if my current dryer were to break down, but I certainly am going to be wise about how I spend my money by ensuring that I do some research to find the most reliable and most energy-efficient brand (Consumer Reports, etc.) and I certainly am going to be wise about ensuring that once I’ve selected Brand A, Model 123, that I get the absolute best price for it. Are you suggesting that if you need a new dryer, you just go to the local appliance and pick out whatever suits your fancy, and what it costs is what it costs?</p>
<p>To me, LBYM (living below your means) is common sense, and it’s how we’ve lived our life. We are in the same home that we lived in when our now 22-year-olds were born. We buy decent but not super-fancy cars (Toyota Camry, Prius, etc.) and hang on to them for years. We save money on the little things like groceries and so forth, which enables us to do the big things like send them to college. </p>
<p>I could be wrong but I think most people hang out with people in similar socio-economic classes. I am also sure there are exceptions.</p>
<p>I was having dinner with one friend and his wife. They are very nice. They said, let’s go eat at this restaurant… It is vegetarian. I said, “great”. How much can vegetables cost?</p>
<p>We go there. The bill was $900 with tip. I don’t drink much by the way. So my wife and I paid $450. </p>
<p>I told him after a little while that I am just not comfortable spending this much for a dinner. He had no clue. (I know there are people on CC that can afford this). </p>
<p>We still hang out together but not as much. I don’t want to go broke here. :)</p>
<p>How will they become targets if they are not actually saying this to anyone except in an anonymous message board?</p>
<p>You’d have to ask whoever made the comment. Although I expect that homes that look expensive may have more need for security systems as there may be more to steal.</p>