<p>I admit that it doesn’t sound like Brown is the right school for this young woman. I’ll also admit that there are cultural differences among the different regions in the US. That said…</p>
<p>The kids who go to the summer programs at Brown are not Brown students. If the guy who hip-checked her at the vending machine is a high school kid, does the OP’s D know where he’s from?</p>
<p>I admit that light years ago my own D ruled out any Southern colleges after spending a month working on a Landmark Volunteer project in the South. There were college kids from one of the most prestigious Southern universities working on the project and the supervisor was a recent grad of another Southern college. My D clashed with them in large part because of her politics, even more because of their views of women, but in part because as soon as she opened her mouth, they’d get an attitude and say “Oh, you’re one of those know it all New Yorkers!” </p>
<p>I also admit that back in the Dark Ages, I knew a very smart young man who grew up in West Texas, graduated from Rice, and went to MIT for grad school. He hated Boston because he said that every time he opened HIS mouth, he could see the locals (not his fellow MIT students) thinking, “He’s dumb, he’s a racist, he’s a hick.” </p>
<p>So part of the cultural differences thing is having to deal with people who make assumptions about you based on where you’re from. Only a couple of the kids from our neighborhood who have attended Southern universities have liked them. The couple were star athletes who won social acceptance based on that. Most of the others transferred. One did stick it out after her attempts to transfer to an equally prestigious college in the Northeast failed. Asked what she was most looking forward to about graduating, she answered truthfully " Getting the ___ out of the South." </p>
<p>So, I wouldn’t suggest that this OP’s D go to college in the Northeast. However, I think she should make sure she’s not judging Brown based on a group of high school students very few of whom will end up attending Brown.</p>
<p>“However, I don’t think a couple weeks (or even a summer) is ncessarily enough exposure to another region to decide if it’s a place you could grow to love.”</p>
<p>Given the good fortune of making good friends, one could grow to love almost any place. However, I think that a couple of weeks can be enough to decide whether one likes a place enough to want to attend college there.</p>
<p>The U.S. is huge and has thousands of good colleges, something that can provide an overwhelming number of possibilities. I’m for anything that allows students to narrow their choices.</p>
<p>^ Exactly! It’s wonderful that kids have so many excellent choices that they can resort to things like location and cultural differences to make the cut. That’s something to celebrate – and college life is a big enough adjustment in itself that I don’t get all the CC posters who insist that (some) kids should be shoved out of whatever they find to be their comfort zone – whether it’s the weather, the architecture, or cultural norms. There are an overwhelming number of wonderful choices. Being able to filter those choices is good!</p>
<p>Down South, it’s polite to say ma’am/sir to any adult, including your parents.<br>
Up North, it’s polite to say ma’am/sir to a stranger (“excuse me, ma’am, but I think you dropped your glove”; “pardon me, sir, could you tell me how to get to Main Street?”) but it’s generally rude to say ma’am/sir to people you have a relationship with and whose name you know, since saying ma’am/sir to them is keeping them at a distance and implying that your relationship is formal / distant. That’s not unmannerly, it’s just a different set of manners.</p>
<p>Similarly, down South, you may hold the doors open for women, but up north, people hold the doors for anyone who may need help, man or woman. Again, not unmannerly, just a different set of manners.</p>
<p>Look, I certainly think it’s a fine thing for students to prefer their home region to some other part of the country, and I’m sure the young lady in question has all sorts of reasons both weighty and inconsequential for reconsidering her infatuation with Brown. </p>
<p>I was responding to the notion that menfolk taking offense at insults to their women is an unalloyed positive trait.</p>