My little brother has been extremely passionate about going into medicine, particularly the dental field. He did relatively well in middle school, and okay in high school where he got B+'s in basic science classes like Biology 1 or Chem 1. However, at the start of 11th grade his entire school career just fell. He took IB Chem 2 and completely failed, getting a 30% average for his tests, even though I’ve seen him consistently study at least 8-12 hours for each exam, whereas when I took the same courses he took I only studied for about 2 and I managed to get 80s-90s. I’ve also noticed that he has a very poor memory and can’t seem to absorb information very well. I began quizzing him on certain topics after his grades took a toll, and despite the fact that he had just read a study guide or his notes, he could only recall around 20% of the information. To make matters worst, he claims that he has testing anxiety and doesn’t do well on them because his mind goes completely blank once he sits down, at least according to him.
And for those wondering, he has no backups to choose from. He is extremely bad at math, and only mediocre in Spanish, English, and History classes, which doesn’t even mean anything either because the classes he’s taking are inflated where tests are only worth like 35% of your grade, and despite this, he still has C’s in those classes. In addition, he can’t really do business or law because he’s socially awkward and has poor people skills.
I personally do not think that he has any chance of surviving Pre-Med, but he’s extremely determined and really wants to pursue his lifelong dream. I’d hate to break it to him, but if he were to major in a Pre-medical science he would likely waste a large amount of money in college tuition as he’d probably drop out. Do you think college is really for him? He’d hate to hear it but right now, I think it would be better for him to go into a trade school.
I know you think you’re trying to help your brother, but it’s his life, not yours. You probably need to butt out and let him discover his own path through the world. If medicine is his dream, then you need to back off and let him pursue it. It’s not your job to crush his dream. If he pursues pre-med, he’ll either succeed or he won’t. If he’s successful–wonderful! Be happy for him. If he’s not, then be there to offer support. (And whatever you do, don’t say “I knew you’d never make it…”)
As for the money & “wasting” the cost of his tuition --that’s really not your decision either. That’s up to your parents.
You can help him in several ways.
First, help him discover that there are many health professions. Nurse and nurse practitioner. Physician’s assistant. Both pay as well as being a family doctor, have good hours, and don’t require 10-12 years of college studies. Encourage him to ‘prepare’ by taking continuing education first aid classes, then taking the courses to become an EMT.
Second, make sure he understands you DO NOT 'major in premedical studies '. You major in whatever you want. I’d suggest majors that would be Plan B and C, which ALL serious premeds have because being a serious premed means taking the odds seriously. Possibilities include Food science, agribusiness, health&human development, business analytics, information technology, all of which have immediate job paths. Note that most medical school students don’t go straight from college to med school, so having a solid career path is important.
Third, start looking into colleges, perhaps visiting a variety of them. Look at two types of colleges: those with excellent academics and pre health support (all colleges offer good classes for premed requirements. The difference is in the level of support.) Those tend to be small, with a low faculty : student ratio. Examples would include Juniata, York, Hiram, Augsburg, Drake, Millsaps, Eckerd.
Then, look into public universities (regional/directionals, branches NOT the flagship) that offer the majors I listed above; compare their five year graduation rates. Fill out the 'request info form’with him so that he gets info from the more distant schools.
Fourth, help him study for the sat or act. He’ll need to take the test several times, even if it’s a dreary test and he doesn’t want to get up on Saturdays. Tell him that if he’s serious about med school, he’ll take the test in the spring of junior year (may/june) after serious 'prepping ’ - no wasting money taking the test ‘just to see’. More studying over the summer, focusing on areas of weakness. Test at the end of the summer. And again and again in the fall, depending on results. Let him know that getting into medical school tests people’s resolve, and ability to take and retake that dreadful test… Is the first test. It’s up to him to show whether he takes the challenge seriously or not.
@sushipanda Wonderful you are concerned about your sibling and want to help. It is a balancing act and handle carefully. Be a friend and enable him to make his decision.
The best thing to do for any health related profession is to try out. EMT or CNA or any volunteer work in hospital or old age home or hospice etc. That will first help him to know whether really he is interested in that line of profession or not. Theory and work at times are so different, whether it is in medical or computer science/IT or business or engineering.
If he is interested in medical related area (based on the exposure he gets by volunteering) that will drive him to accomplish well in studies. Because you never know what is going on with him now, as we all roll in to adolescence and with what kind of friends he is hanging out.
Also realize people change so much over the course of time. Some folks study well in school and not that great in college and some exactly reverse. As long as he has the foundation well, he can pick up any time and find a way to take care of his own life. GL.
Your brother can always start his studies at a community college. CCs are fairly inexpensive and your brother can find out where his academic strength lie – or don’t lie–without bankrupting the family.
Given your description, I think that a college pre-med curriculum would provide a swift sink-or-swim experience for him. If you are correct, then he will find an alternative that suits him. If you are wrong, he will get stronger academically with time.
I think your concern is not whether he sinks or swims. My inference is that you are worried how far he sinks. But, as others have said, it is his choice. As a brother, all you can do is be supportive and encourage a broader viewpoint.
Your brother can start his studies at a community college. CCs are fairly inexpensive and tuition can be covered by a guaranteed federal student loan. ($5500) Your brother can find out where his academic strengths lie – or don’t lie–without bankrupting the family.
There’s no shame in starting out at a CC. I know of a number of people who have and who have gone on to be successful in their careers–including healthcare fields. Starting out at a CC won’t disqualify him from going to med school later on. He can take his introductory science & math there and if he’s successful, then he can transfer to a 4 year college where he can complete pre-med requirements if his interests still lay in that direction.
But I still think it’s not your place to tell your brother what he can and can’t study. If he wants to try pre-med, that’s fine. Let him try. He needs find out for himself whether he can succeed at it. There is such a thing as a late bloomer. Not everyone is an academic superstar in high school. Some people need to have a well-defined goal in sight before they can buckle down and earn As. Some people need a little more time to grow up and get serious about school. And some people are just lazy/unmotivated because they find high school boring and stupid and full of busywork–which it often is.
You need to be supportive of your brother and not be quite so judgmental.
And I have to ask, has your brother been tested for learning disabilities? Often bright individuals are able to mask their learning disabilities in the lower grades but as the material becomes more complex and reading becomes more intense, they start to flounder because their innate abilities can no longer compensate for their handicaps. Often learning learning disabilities don’t come to the forefront until high school or later. (I’ve seen this first hand both as the parent of a “twice exceptional” child–both gifted and dyslexic–and as a former teacher of the gifted where a 1/3 of my students had other educational diagnoses–like dyslexia, dyscalculia or executive function disorders.)
@sushipanda My BF has dyslexia. She went to Scripps college, took courses at all the Claremont colleges, and went to an Ivy med school. She is bad at math and a bad test taker. Today she is one of the best surgeons in a top US city. She had accommodations and support from faculty and family. I think that was a key to her success and she’s very driven. My kid has dyslexia and his IQ puts him near or at genius. I would not count him out at whatever he wants to do. Medicine has been brought up for him. Specifically, surgeon. He is luckier than my friend because today they now have ways to teach math to people whp have dyscalculia but he doesn’t have that. My impression from your posts that your brother doesn’t know what kind of dyslexia he has and that he hasn’t gotten support or accommodations? Is that right?
“My brother…” Reminds me of a poster who PMed back and forth with me months ago about their friend and then the other day PMed me again and everything was first person this time.