OK, so now that S24 is going to college where it snows and is COLD he has finally agreed that he needs a real winter coat. I havent bought one since he was 8 (he wears a fleece and a sweatshirt when it is cold here in the NYC area and his brother goes to school in North Carolina). So what do the not so cool kids wear (ha!)
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My S also went to a cold weather school the last two years, this is the heaviest jacket he will wear: Patagonia Men's Nano Puff® Jacket
My D had a Canada Goose coat at a cold weather school and never wore it.
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My boys wouldn’t wear real winter coats in Maine!! My middle kid often wore shorts. They both survived somehow.
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My kid who didn’t like coats either (and we live where it gets very cold) had an LLBean winter jacket that actually did get some wear. He now owns a Northface thing that is a fleece with a separate windbreaker top. But that’s more for mid range wear.
I’d give your son some options to choose from and let him choose. Patagonia is popular here, and the Northface. While they don’t look all that warm, those down puffer jackets actually are warm.
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Down puffer jacket would be a good start. Plus sweatshirts/fleece to layer. My boys all have the Patagonia down ones. The nano puff isn’t as warm I don’t think.
Layering is absolutely the key, and it doesn’t need a bulky outer layer, because that is actually for water protection. It is the middle layer that insulates, and if you keep it dry it doesn’t have to be too bulky. See these couple links:
That being said, if you want to combine the water-protection layer and insulation in one convenient garment, my two cents is you cannot do better than a 100% (or close) wool coat. Again, I would advise against getting it heavily lined, you can put on sweaters and such underneath as necessary. But a reasonably thick layer of wool remains a great durable and warm option even when wet–you just have to be OK with the look and the fact it will be a little heavy (but not too bulky). The non-blended ones are also not cheap (although you can look for vintage), but again these are typically very long-lasting.
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Patagonia down “sweater” was the male jacket of choice for my sons and their friends – it’s a regular puffer jacket, hits around the hip, but is called a sweater.
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First of all, I feel your pain. It is hard to find a jacket they will wear if they have never really worn one, except to go in the snow. We live in the Northeast, so it is cold for sure.
This might sound shallow, and it is, but I knew the only coat I’d get my son to wear would be one that looked “cool.” So I found a great coat, can’t remember the brand, but I think it was from Zumiez. He loved it, but lost it after 2 years. Duh.
Then I got him a fantastic Carhartt coat on sale. It’s perfect because he can wear it around without looking like he’s about to go snowboarding, but he also does wear it snowboarding. And it’s stylish and he piles up his hoodies under that. It’s very thick and not just a rain jacket. https://www.carhartt.com/product/104670-MOSMREG?kpid=Ecomm_PMAX_Brand-Plus_go_cmp-20373968802_adg-_ad-__dev-c_ext-_prd-104670-MOSMREG_sig-Cj0KCQiA4NWrBhD-ARIsAFCKwWvAxg3AyUGp3UKcOZB4fxCm_Xn5GgPz5f_sL2lZd-x0nSSG1gEVV3caAqbPEALw_wcB&gad_source=1&gclid=Cj0KCQiA4NWrBhD-ARIsAFCKwWvAxg3AyUGp3UKcOZB4fxCm_Xn5GgPz5f_sL2lZd-x0nSSG1gEVV3caAqbPEALw_wcB
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My S22 has a thin Burton puffer jacket that he wears with a beanie. It is warm but not too bulky. Also, both my kiddos have fleece lined flannels they wear over their hoodies. They only wear really warm coats when we ski. The Burton coat is similar to this one .Men's Burton Mid-Heat Down Jacket | Burton.com Winter 2024 US
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My son attends boarding school not too far from Williams. Most the boys don’t wear coats unless it’s really cold like hovering around zero but that doesn’t happen very often in that neck of the woods. His first year I bought him a Canada Goose jacket. Shortly after getting it he left it in the athletic facility where it walked. Without my knowledge, he spent the rest of the winter without a jacket. I bought him an Adidas puffer on sale after that. He wears it mostly going to and from the pool but to classes he’s generally without a winter jacket. This year he got a black fleece jacket and a Carhartt jacket. Both are the in thing.
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Btw, I got my son the Moss color of that jacket, which is less army green than it looks. The fabric has a nice texture.
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The Patagonia nano puff jacket I posted earlier is definitely not as warm as their down options…but S says the down is too warm. The nano puff (and I think we are on our 3rd one because he also loses stuff) is only for the very coldest days lol. Most days he wears something like this: Gravity Checked Borg Lined Shirt Jacket Ecru | ALLSAINTS
This year he transferred to a more temperate area so I bet he won’t wear that nano puff jacket at all.
Seems like it would be best to let him experience the weather and then choose his own (within budget).
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Depending on where he is going to school, how he plans to get around campus (bus or bike, at my son’s school they bike even in the snow) and if he wants to do outdoor activities will dictate what layers he needs.
S23 is an outdoor enthusiast, rides his bike in the snow and hates things that are bulky. If by “cold” you mean often below freezeing, sometimes below zero, and a decent amount of precipitation, I recommend the following layers that can be mixed and matched.
A good silk or wool base layer. This is only if they will be spending a significant amount of time outdoors and not in class. Classrooms are usually overheated and they’ll get too hot.
Wool socks and some kind of waterproof shoe. Once cotton gets wet it is miserable. Few boys wear real winter boots, but you can get waterproof Tims.
Upper layers (hoodie, flannel, quarter zips). Great for overheated classrooms as they can peel the layers off.
A puffer. Remember, most puffers aren’t waterproof in heavy precipitation. A soaking wet puffer is miserable.
Which leaves the final, magical layer. A pullover waterproof shell. Get it large enough to fit over the puffer. S23, who has spent a lot of time outdoors, swears that a puffer plus shell is as warm as his really good winter jacket. His shell is very high quality (it’s been everywhere from the rainforest to Northern MN in February), so I’m not sure if the same would be true for a lower quality shell. He can also wear just the shell for those cold fall rainy days. The shell is also vital on days when wind chill is an issue. A puffer won’t cut it on those days if you are out for more than a few minutes.
He also has a few pairs of quick dry/ waterproof pants that look like regular pants that he will wear over a base layer in cold heavy rain.
With the above layers, I don’t think my son ever wears his “real” winter jacket unless he will be in dangerously low arctic temperatures for a significant length of time.
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Echoing @ucbalumnus – I vote let him get to school, see what other kids are wearing, and let him choose.
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And don’t worry if you think he isn’t dressed appropriately. 
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My S has a North Face down jacket and a North Face fleece.
Given the typical demographic of this forum (mothers of high school / college age boys / men), the difference in perceived need for warmer clothing in cooler weather may be more age and gender related than anything else.
I think the exact location of the college makes a difference in coat choice. NYC vs Boston vs Chicago vs, say, MN. I was doing some digging on this issue recently while we await the ED result. If S24 attends, the plan is to get a substantial parka for those few weeks of really rough winter and he’ll probably just wear a lighter jacket the rest of the time. If he goes elsewhere on his list, he has a lightly insulated parka w/waterproof shell that should do, with a little layering, for the worst of winter in those spots, but it wasn’t enough for the campus tour of the ED school - we froze (even though I had lived there for more than a decade, the difference due to humidity and wind was a little shocking to both of us).
S24 has this light down jacket from the eddie bauer outlet at the moment, which will do for fall and spring and perhaps much of winter in many locations. His siblings use the same, one in Washington state and one in Texas, though I also bought a more waterproof light parka for the kid in WA (no idea if he wears it). Anyway, the linked one packs easily into S24’s backpack, where it has lived for a couple of years. Suddenly, mid senior year, he is starting to actually wear it sometimes, LOL.
Part of the choice will also depend on what the kid wants to wear underneath. Mine may be more of a t-shirt + warmer jacket kid. Others prefer the layering.
Kids don’t feel the cold 
… Swear shirt seems to be the winter fare but my son had a Eddie Bauer parka when needed. I wear a think puffer Eddie Bauer the majority of winter in Chicago. I have my parka for those really cold days.
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