<p>My grandmother always said that when a woman turns 50, she turns a corner. It is a hard adjustment for an attractive woman to realize her looks are going, going, gone. How hard has it been for you?</p>
<p>I have never been that attractive myself. But for my pretty sister, I think getting older and realizing she no longer turns men’s heads has been rough.</p>
<p>Like you, Skyhook, it has never been my “hook” in life. 
I am glad… my stress level is pretty low about it. Now if I thought my mind was really starting to go, THAT would be major trauma for me, as competence and smarts have been my hook.</p>
<p>Actually I like not getting catcalls or harassed, why would someone like that? I also still have my red hair ( although it has faded quite a bit) and I get a smile when someone addresses my chest as " miss".
But I also do have memory problems, probably not Alzheimer’s because I have always had difficulty with short term memory.
If I could have either my looks or my memory, I’m with intparent, I would rather have my memory. Too bad my eyesight & hearing is also bad. Wow, I sound pathetic. Really, I’m not.
I hope. ;)</p>
<p>I will add that I am just a teeny bit irritated that my H weighs the same as when he was 21. I would probably give up a few grey cells to have my 22 yr old waist back. But just a few.</p>
<p>My face has never been my fortune, either, so it’s really not a big deal. I kind of like being invisible to people I don’t know. And you can’t miss what you never had.</p>
<p>Although, since I work in senior services, I have to say that “losing your looks” isn’t strictly accurate. Maybe “losing your youthful looks” conveys what you mean to say, Skyhook? I know several women in their 80s and even 90s who are, truly, still beautiful. And I don’t mean that their inner beauty shines through, though it does - I mean beautiful in the way that Katharine Hepburn, Laurent Bacall, Ingrid Bergmen were beautiful as they aged. Gorgeous bone structure and eyes - wrinkles and lines that somehow underline their beauty without detracting from it. </p>
<p>I am not going to be one of them, though. :D</p>
<p>One secret I’ve discovered is that getting in GOOD shape really helps your looks! Running is an AWESOME way to do that. And believe me, if <em>I</em> can run, anyone without serious problems can (in eighth grade, all 200 of us had to run a mile, and I was literally the slowest kid in the whole class). I started very gradually (running one minute, walking two), and increased over a period of a couple of years. I regained a lot of weight due to the stress over my two ill sons, but now I’m getting back into it. A slim figure goes a long ways towards looking younger!</p>
<p>^^Completely agree. I’m not 50 yet, but Mr. B says I look much better in my 40s than I used to look 10 years ago when I let myself get out of shape. I was never a beauty queen, so just like frazzled, I think facial aging is not that big of a deal.</p>
<p>ML that reminds me of a wman I worked with who was very high energy and slender. She said when she got older she was going to gain enough weight so it pushed out all the wrinkles!
That is one difference I notice with aging. When my body is at a good weight, my face looks haggard, that doesn’t go away until I am about ten lbs overweight.
But I still am fighting those ten lbs pretty hard.</p>
<p>I too think it is has more to do with what we value in the first place. My Mother-in-law has struggled with losing her beauty. It was her conerstone in life. I never thought she was beautiful but she really did. She has always thought of me as not very pretty. I don’t really care because I have never banked on it. Although I was never extremely pretty, I was not unfortunate in my looks either. Many people think I am younger than I am. I have always valued my ability to care for my family. I am one of those people that you can depend on always. Personally I would rather have my health more than anything else as I age.</p>
<p>Yes, my Italian mother was sure that her several extra pounds helped her look better…pushing those wrinkles out. And I kinda agree.</p>
<p>I do notice that as my waist gets smaller, my face looks more aged. Oh well, they still think my brain is useful to have around at work. And DH seems sincerely to see me through rose colored glasses. Life IS good.</p>
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<p>I had to laugh at that.</p>
<p>If you handed me two pictures of strangers (assuming I did not know Mom3ToGo) … one of Mom3ToGo at 30 and another of Mom3ToGo at 50 … the I would certainly pick the 30 year old Mom3ToGo as the more attractive one.</p>
<p>However if real life I like the 50 year old version of Mom3ToGo much better than the 30 year old version … and I find her incredibly attractive … I’m really looking forward to the empty nest and our being able to do whatever, wherever, and whenever we want.</p>
<p>Mom3ToGo has aged well … frankly, I MUCH more worried about the 55-60 year old me and my ability to do my part in our empty nest than I am about Mom3ToGo.</p>
<p>Good point music mom, my H still thinks I’m beautiful, and his opinion is the only one that matters to me. He also is much more patient with my physical difficulties than I would have predicted 30 years go. ( more so than I am)</p>
<p>I am well over 50. I think my looks are fine.</p>
<p>I was at gym with my daughter, I’m 51 she’s 21. Anyway, she was putting me thru her workout and we were facing the mirror. Turns out we were both in almost the same outfits, blue shirts, black yoga pants, high blond ponytails, and standing next to each, I said, dear you are looking at yourself in 30 years, and she sweetly said she hoped so.</p>
<p>I don’t mind aging, but am fighting getting old. Whatever I do to my face I do to the back of my hands. I am fitter then I ever was. I eat well. I don’t look fifty but I don’t look thirty. My mom is amazing for 73. She has embraced her grey, me, not so much.</p>
<p>I have seen women from my kids preschool times and man some aged well, and some look old. Taking pride in ones looks doesn’t mean trying to look young. But to let oneself go is just sad.</p>
<p>There comes a time when you have to choose between your fanny and your face.</p>
<p>My face still is roughly the same, no worse off. Some men still look at my body, thanks to push up bra, my upper body still look good in clothes. The most important person is my husband who claimed he couldn’t see any wrinkles nor grey hair, his eyes are very bad for close-up, so I know he is not lying. But the worse part is my memory, it’s not great as it used to be.</p>
<p>I never felt particularly pretty either. I need to lose about 50 lbs., but I carry it pretty well and am otherwise very fit, so it doesn’t show where it’s visible (more in my upper arms, hips and legs). I’ve always prided myself on having attractive feet (I know that’s an odd body part to fixate on) and I like to wear nice shoes. I have a friend who is my age who is rail thin and has below shoulder length blond hair. She must buy her clothes in the junior dept. Until you see her face up close, you wouldn’t think she was in her mid 50s and a grandma. But she has “old” feet. </p>
<p>I had white blond hair when I was a child. It darkened considerably as I grew older but has always had a lot of reddish highlights “naturally.” It’s now probably pretty white (my mom when grey in her early 40’s) but I keep it blond. Fortunately, the blond color is not so very much different from the gray and I don’t have to worry about roots. I think I look about 10 years younger than I am but I’ll never go below that, and I don’t really care. I feel 35.</p>
<p>Looks has never been my “hook” and I’ve been more or less content with my body through the years or at least enough if I gain 10 pounds I work at removing them. My 55 year old body is still strong and healthy and that’s all I care about. My bones have a + dexa score and there’s nothing wrong with me. I don’t know if other men think I’m attractive or not and I never worried about that when I was younger, so not worrying about it now. My 1950s mom was so consumed by her appearance (and still is at 84) that it ‘turned me off’ of being to consumed with my looks/body/etc but it took me a number of years in my lates teens to get to that place. I have to admit that despite my contentment with aging I really hate my neck so I’m not totally content. It bothers me so to see the skin loose and i don’t think there is anything anyone can do short of surgery which I would never do. I think I’ve aged as well as anyone.</p>
<p>I think as long as a woman is content to look her best for her age, and focuses most of her efforts on being fit and healthy, she can age with beauty and grace. When I see women who have had lots of plastic surgery (don’t even get me started on those hideous lip enhancements) and wear their hair and clothes in a manner more appropriate to a teenager, I don’t think they look remotely attractive. They look freakish and desperate and might as well carry a sign saying “I am futilely unhappy with aging and am grasping frantically and unsuccessfully at my youth.”</p>
<p>I’m not dissatisfied with how I look. </p>
<p>On the other hand, I recently realized that, if I won the lottery, I would get veneers on my teeth, have the dermatologist get rid of my spider veins and what-not, and get my eyes done.</p>
<p>Otherwise, I’m fine just the way I am. :D</p>
<p>I’m quite happy in my own skin & have always been so. I still look pretty good and am very fit WITHOUT looking haggard. No complaints. One of the secrets of looking young is having an older spouse who will always be older than you. :)</p>