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<p>Yes indeed. She foolishly decided to walk in Manhattan, the Bronx, Queens and Brooklyn. She should have avoided those neighborhoods. </p>
<p>A very pronounced set of body parts. She can’t help it. She was born that way. But she will be blamed henceforth</p>
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<p>Just as women who aren’t will be. 
Women are pretty awful to their fellow woman-kind.</p>
<p>Rhandco, those guys were asking her out??? Really? Yep, that is what they were doing.</p>
<p>My amateur analysis convinces me that a lot of “verbal leering” is about control and the commenter’s lack of genuine self-esteem, or God forbid, something more malevolent.</p>
<p>I’m male and this stuff has always annoyed me, too, when I’ve seen it in public places. I asked a female friend once why do some women bother to respond to the “hi baby” morons. In her opinion, it was safer to gave a quick hello and be on your way. Not sure I agree because I think answering their greeting encourages them.</p>
<p>Also, that being said, there is something to the ‘spray-on jeans’ (and muffin tops) equation. For morons or even predators, it like bees to honey. Here on CC we tell kids all the time “know where you are.”</p>
<p>" just never experienced or have seen this happening, while in college, in big cities, in bad areas, etc. I dress conservatively. The woman in the video was wearing TIGHT as in spray-on almost jeans, she was wearing heavy makeup, and she had a microphone in each hand"</p>
<p>Bingo. Sure, a woman should be able to dress in whatever they like, but you can avoid harassment by being careful in your dress. Yes, it’s not fair, but it’s reality. When I was younger, I was thin and buxom, and very careful about how I dressed. Tight jeans and a tight t shirt, while walking around by myself like that----no way. Even to this day I am careful about my dress, and will wear looser and sloppier clothes. Even when I’m going to exercise somewhere, I will pick the looser, less flattering clothing, especially if I am going by myself. Running with my husband, I am less careful.</p>
<p>If you wear tight clothing that prominently shows off a large chest, you are going to get a reaction you may not (or may) like. I don’t think she’d have a story if she dressed like I do.</p>
<p>@rhandco </p>
<p>Please stop @ing me. I keep getting notifications. I have stopped reading your posts.</p>
<p>@"Cardinal Fang So now it’s her location? What if that’s where one works & lives. What if someone is raped during broad daylight in their small town? Does that mean that they shouldn’t go out during the day? Should they move out of that town? Again, victim blaming. It’s because of her location! Yeah. That’s it. Shame on her for living and working in a city where she grew up, where her family lives, where she feels most at home. (Not saying this about video subject, just in general)</p>
<p>The point is It happens everywhere. Should women form a society that are free of low life men so they won’t get harassed? </p>
<p>Should women have surgery to remove their lady lumps? Should we always wear shirts up to our necks and loose skirts? What about when our lumps can’t be concealed by the loose skirts & neck strangling tops? Then what? How far should we go? </p>
<p>I think it’s a valid point that it’s not necessarily harassment to try to chat up a person of the opposite sex. But I don’t think that’s what’s happening in most of these cases. The guy who says “Damn!” after you’ve walked passed him isn’t trying to chat you up. To a certain extent, I think what’s happening is that people are rudely saying out loud what they are thinking–and they don’t care if it makes the object of it uncomfortable. I do suspect that some of them, at least, are trying to make the object uncomfortable.</p>
<p>Side note: NewHaven, re notifications, I think you can go to the gear at the top of the page in the upper right-hand corner to change your preferences.</p>
<p>@"Deborah T" </p>
<p>I don’t put down women who are less endowed. Who does that? Being well endowed brings so much unwanted attention as many women will agree with. From a very young age! I went to an all girls catholic high-school and the top heavy girls were called slut, whore…you name it. Just because they had large breasts. I would never put anyone down for having less than. Life is far less complicated that way.</p>
<p>^^ thanks. I forgot about that! Lol</p>
<p>These men who think they are just being friendly … how would they react if a strange man on the street used their exact same words towards them?</p>
<p>GA2012MOM - exactly. Dressing ugly (as I normally dress) is a costume for some. Dressing pretty (as some normally dress) is a costume for others.</p>
<p>For nudists, everything is a costume.</p>
<p>And NHCTM, I stopped binge drinking because I was almost raped. I stopped letting a guy walk into my dorm room, day or night, because I was almost raped. I was almost raped because I was very drunk. I was almost raped because some guy was nice enough to walk me home, and walked into my dorm room and started to take my clothes off (without any talking or kissing or anything remotely related). Of course I did not quit school. But I also stopped going to parties by myself, because I was almost raped.</p>
<p>That might be sad and all, but I had to make those decisions for my mental and physical safety, in my mind.</p>
<p>Again - what is harassed? Do all almost 100 comments made to this woman meet the criteria of harassment? Isn’t harassment just unwanted attention?</p>
<p>Or is someone trying to convince everyone that all almost 100 comments to this actress meet law enforcement sexual harassment criteria?</p>
<p>Is there some kind of female jealously, I am missing here as a male?Seriously. </p>
<p>Womem are jealous of other good looking women so good looking women have to hide their bodies?</p>
<p>My wife never wears anything provacative in public…except for those yoga pants. :)</p>
<p>New Haven-- I was joking. Sorry, should have put a smiley. </p>
<p>A woman who avoids walking in Manhattan, Queens, Brooklyn and the Bronx is avoiding walking in any part of New York City except Staten Island.** That may be some posters’ ideas of a reasonable requirement of a way for a New Yorker to live, but to me it’s absurd to tell women that if they don’t want sexual harassment, they should just not walk, and it’s their fault if they do walk and get harassed.</p>
<p>**Harassers harass in Staten Island too; I just don’t think the woman went there for her video. </p>
<p>Ahhhh ok @"Cardinal Fang" </p>
<p>Things get lost in translation here! </p>
<p>If this is a problem, what can an individual, or society as a whole, do about it?
I don’t like the idea that a woman should have to dress in a way to avoid these kinds of comments, if the woman in the video wasn’t dressed down enough. I’m not entirely against the idea that dressing provocatively can be a bad idea in certain situations, but good grief–this woman is not dressed provocatively by any sensible standard this side of Saudi Arabia or Amish country.
I also don’t like the idea that women should acknowledge these comments as if they were real compliments.
So, should a woman ignore, or confront the guys who do this? Unfortunately, my observation is that confronting them only causes them to continue to talk to you, and to annoy you even more. Although even ignoring them sometimes has that effect (as we see in the video), most of these low-lifes won’t expend enough energy to follow you down the sidewalk if you’re ignoring them.
Maybe it would help if other men would tell them to knock it off, but I don’t know what would actually happen. I remember once watching a train crew person trying to get a low-life to turn down his music (which was blasting from ear-phones), and the result was just a big hassle and more annoyance for everybody.</p>
<p>Wow, has this touched a nerve. I went away for a few hours and we’re almost up to a hundred posts.</p>
<p>I’m always struck by this quote of Golda Meir:</p>
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<p>The woman in this video has done absolutely nothing to deserve being commented on in this way. I lived in Manhattan for 17 years and most days I was harassed just as the woman in the video was. One might decide it wasn’t harassment – just those things we now call “microaggressions.” IMO, there’s no difference. Anything that makes you uncomfortable is a form of harassment.</p>
<p>I remember one day wearing a t shirt with a map of the NYC subway system on it. Some man walked up to me, looked me up and down and, leering, said, “Hey, baby, I like your shirt. How do I get downtown?”</p>
<p>It happened all the time. All. The. Time. Every day. I am neither gorgeous nor amply endowed. I wore clothes just like what everyone else wore. </p>
<p>S1 was born in NYC. Two weeks after his birth, I finally went for a walk down Broadway by myself – my first time out alone. Two weeks post partum, mind you. Some fellow passed me and made kissy noises. Two weeks post partum! I was still bleeding and fat!!</p>
<p>I developed a persona for whenever I went outside. I frowned, walked very quickly, and never never never made eye contact with anyone. The comments never stopped. I always felt unsafe.</p>
<p>Now that I’m older, I don’t get the comments so much. What a shame that I had to get old before I could feel safe in NYC.</p>
<p>It’s hard to put yourself in another person’s shoes, but if you watch for a while you see all kinds of things go on for people different from yourself. We all have our blessings and burdens to bear.</p>
<p>@Hunt I would LOVE to confront people who say gross things to me, but at least to me, the risks far outweigh the benefits. I am a tiny young woman and most of these men have 50-100 pounds on me, and if I were to confront them, I risk additional verbal abuse and possibly physical violence.</p>