<p>Back in the summer, my ex and I set up a non-communication agreement. However, it’s been months since we parted, and I’m genuinely curious to find out how she’s doing. We didn’t specify a timeframe for this agreement- only “until things become right.” But my question is how do I know if things right now are “right”? If this is supposed to be based on our gut feeling, then I sense that they are.</p>
<p>Is it OK for me to call her house just to say hi? or maybe even meet up for coffee and a hug?</p>
<p>Difficult break-up: external forces, irreconcilable differences, inevitability of break up, freedom to date other people without distraction/hope for a possible reunification, etc. </p>
<p>If you set up the non-communication agreement, there was probably a good reason. Try asking a mutual friend what their opinion is; they’ll have more perspective on each of you and the situation.</p>
<p>Yesterday was crazy. I met up with my best bud (who’s also good friends with my ex) to play ball. However, he also invited my ex over but he didn’t tell me that beforehand!!!(arghh I wanted to kill him because I didn’t get dressed or anything). It didn’t occur to me at all that he would do that, because usually (at least back in HS), I’d just come over to his house and we’d play ball. *** seriously, I think sounded like an idiot half the time… I still keep going over what I said in my head (sometimes, when I’m extremely nervous, my speech problem shows up but not much). </p>
<p>That’s not the worst part though. It’s that I don’t think she’s attracted to me anymore (I really hope it’s not because I came across as ■■■■■■■■, because I didn’t stutter noticeably until the end). I mean he looked me in the eye and I looked back while we talked about a bunch of random stuff, but I don’t think she feels the same towards me anymore :(. It was a dagger in the heart because honestly, I still love her but I didn’t say anything because I didn’t know if I should have. My friend tells me she might be seeing someone else, but we’re thinking maybe they’re just close friends. I wish I had asked but I was too afraid. Anyway, I invited her to my little brother’s birthday party later this afternoon even though I knew she’d have some reservation about going since my parents didn’t like her back in HS… my little brother and older sister do though. I was thinking at least, it was better to invite her and have her turn it down than leave her wondering why I didn’t invite her. What do you guys think? Anyway, she said she might go but she’ll tell me later today. If she does go, my plan is to leave the party with her and a bunch of friends after dinner or something just so it won’t be as awkward around the house. Plus, it’s also her birthday later this week, so I’m hoping that our group of friends can do something special for her tonight.</p>
<p>To the OP, I think you need to step back and approach the situation in a calmer way. No matter what the reason you two agreed upon the “no communication” rule, time has passed. You can’t just jump back into the relationship and expect it to be the same. However, I do think you could reasonably speak with her to see where things stand now. Maybe there will be nothing left, maybe it will be able to evolve into something better than it was. Ask her for that cup of coffee without the hug. It has been six months and you certainly deserve to know your status going into the new year. You know, either mend it or move on. Good luck! :)</p>
<p>I don’t know about that guys. UB-Vinny77 is awfully confident. The kind of confidence girls find attractive. No one likes to admit it but you know and I know that girls don’t always go for guys who treat them well.</p>