Would you buy your kid a car?

Parent Cafe
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<p>In the spirit of the class consciousness threads, weigh in on this discussion of conspicuous consumption.</p>

<p>My 15 year old is looking forward to this summer and getting the much desired driver’s license. He has to be driven to school, no bus service, and to any ECs, he does bum a few rides, but we can’t carpool because of our jobs, so we try to limit the ride bumming, and buy gas for the drivers (all young ladies, always, he’s no fool).</p>

<p>Right now we have 3 vehicles - a 2001 SporTrac (DH’s), a 2002 Lexus SUV (mine, and I will drive it into the ground, I love that car), and DD’s car, a 2004 Toyota Echo, parked at home while she is at college.</p>

<p>The right answer to the question, of course, is to have son drive D’s car while she is at school, well, it is not so easy.
D is incensed at the idea of bro driving her car; son is not one to be overly concerned with being cool, but c’mon, it is an Echo (at least it is not a Yugo)! More practically speaking, D is 4’10" and son is 6’2", she chose the Echo because it fits her perfectly, son looks like he is wearing the car. He is almost eye-level with the window visor, and honestly does have some difficulty seeing out. We’ve discussed with son the idea that he could have a fancier/better/sportier/newer car if he waits until graduation, but he doesn’t like that idea too much, anyway, he wants either a Honda Civic (I think he may have the same size problem as with the Echo, but we haven’t gotten there yet) or an ancient LandRover (huh?!).
DH and I know that at some point we will buy DS a car, we just don’t want 4 cars sitting around in the driveway, that’s way too redneck for us.</p>

<p>SO, wise ones, what would you do?? We are thinking DH drive my car, DS drive the Ford and I drive the go-cart, uh, Echo (actually I love driving the Echo, it is like a go-cart, but it doesn’t have power steering or door locks, didya know they still made 'em that way?, so it is a pain to park and back up).</p>

<p>By the way, “Le bon temps roulez” Happy Mardi Gras to all.</p>

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<p>Depends on the kid. We thought DD was mature enough…now after her first accident we’re not so sure.</p>

<p>Lucky for us, she accepted full responsibility, is paying for all costs and fines. It will be an expensive lesson. She is not, however, bringing her car to school in the fall.</p>

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<p>Safety first. If he truly has problems seeing out, the Echo is not an option.</p>

<p>I think you should always assume that a kid will bang up the first car. (You might be lucky, but…) So it shouldn’t be very expensive. I’d probably do the car switch - I can’t imagine letting a perfectly good car sit in the driveway. And then he can get something better later.</p>

4

<p>We don’t buy our children cars. ALL cars are “family” cars, and yes, they may be (and ARE) used by the kids. DH and I pay for the cars, the insurance, and the gasoline. IMHO, that qualifies the vehicles as ours. If any child of mine earned enough to buy a car and pay all related expenses himself, then the car would be his to do with as he pleases.</p>

<p>In our family, there would not even be a question as to whether or not a car would be used while a kid was away at school. The car would be used by any other driving sibs. That is what we do now. When S went to Duke, the car he used to drive is now driven by his sisters (my third just got her license a couple of weeks ago). When he comes home for breaks, he is exceedingly considerate in asking for car usage and will drive any one that’s available. We do, however, try to give him “car priority” when he’s back. </p>

<p>Next year will be a problem for us. BOTH of our girls will need access to a car as one will be in college nearby and the other will be in h.s. and also have other driving responsibilities. At that time, we will become “redneck,” as you put it. We actually do have four cars now, but are in the process of getting rid of one and finding another. Given all the adopteds that call our house their home, we typically even have MORE cars than four sitting around! ;)</p>

<p>~berurah</p>

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<p>Berurah, just don’t let any of them stay long enough to have the car end up on blocks ;), then you do have to check the back of your neck! I have visions of a never ending parade of banging doors and hugs for Berurah-mom, - how many cookies can you bake at once, and what is your milk bill?
Yeah, we are assuming that the car will get banged up,too, that is one of my unspoken worries about DS using Dad’s car, I actually don’t think it is as safe as the Echo, because it is a high profile vehicle.</p>

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<p>Ditto with Berurah’s family. We have a “spare” car. Whoever is home gets to drive it. I certainly wouldn’t buy a 16 year old car - but that’s just my opinion. I figure, if they want a car they can buy one.</p>

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<p>

:eek: What about the kids?? Wonder if that will happen to THEM after they’ve been here this long??!! ;)</p>

<p>

Cookies: I NEVER bake less than 14-15 dozen at once! :D</p>

<p>Milk: The bill is about as bad as our gasoline bills, and we have two vehicles with 40 gallon tanks! :eek: </p>

<p>~b.</p>

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<p>You driving the Echo sounds best to me, but to be honest my father bought my sister and me used cars once we were old enough to drive. Our school also didn’t have bus service, and we both had summer jobs, changing time schedules, and social lives. I did not live anywhere with real public transportation. I got a 1996 Saab and my older sister started out with an old Jeep which had some problems so then she got a Saab, too. You have to deal with occassional car problems, but it’s worked out great for us. Two and four years later, neither of us has ever been in an accident or gotten a ticket, but this wasn’t the case for most kids in my high school. It does feel silly during the school year to have two cars in the driveway not being used, but we’re fine with that. In the end, when all four of us are home, which is about a third of the year, we’re using all four cars.</p>

<p>EDIT: All the cars are technically “family cars,” but it’s clear that one of the cars was bought and remains for my use, one for my sister, and then one for my mother, and one for my father. My parents pay insurance. My parents also picked up the gas tab throughout high school since the vast majority of my driving was to/from school, and no matter what someone was going to have to drive me there. In college, we are expected to pay for gas.</p>

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<p>Off topic - how in the world did you end up with kids 4’10 and 6’2?</p>

<p>We bought S1 a car for Christmas his senior year of HS - a 5 year old Escort (with a good sound system - which, in his mind, somewhat compensated for the fact that we were giving him an Escort.) Not necessarily a car he bragged about, but 7 years later, he is still driving it. We were parents who always said we were never going to give our kid a car, and were amazed at the entitlement some kids seem to feel. We buckled at the point where it made more sense to have one than to not - that seems to be where you are. But we shopped for a good, solid, practical car WITHOUT too much cool factor. This was to be a tool, not a lifestyle. Although he is one of the most responsible kids on earth, we still felt it wasn’t wise to tempt him with high speed and power.</p>

<p>We live in a wealthy area, where it is definitely not cool to ride the “big cheese” to school senior year. It is a joke among the teachers that you can spot the faculty cars – the older, practical cars. The convertibles, SUVs, and sports cars are all students’. However, my senior D is surviving the bus anyway, and seems to be relatively untraumatized by it. She doesn’t even have her license yet, let alone a car. And nobody’s called Children’s Services on us.</p>

<p>[Edit - lots of new posts while I was composing mine. Yes, S2 drove it when S1 went to college. When we moved to Germany, S1 took it to Philly. An old, beat up car is the only kind to have in Philly.]</p>

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<p>

Sounds as if you’re trying to make a statement with the choice of vehicle. How about a Rolls? That certainly won’t be seen as “redneck” by any outside observers. Plus, I think they have plenty of head room.</p>

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<p>Mine has a Honda Accord, born in the same year as my d. She has named it “Mercedes”.</p>

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<p>Ditto weenie’s and berurah’s families. We have a '96 Accord and whoever needed to drive it negotiated with the other and worked out usage. S1 finally saved up enough to purchase, insure, and fix up his VW van after his first year at college, and S2 had his heart set on a motorcycle which he purchased and insured this year, so they have final say over those two vehicles. The Accord is starting to become almost unneeded.</p>

<p>Is the Echo a car your D bought, cangel, or did you buy it for her? If the former, I would be reluctant to let S use it, but if I’d purchased it, it would really be my vehicle and depending on the agreement I had with the child I’d purchased it for, I’d consider it fair game for allocating to another child while the original user was off at college. (I’d recommend the kids talk with each other so there’s no hard feelings, though.)</p>

<p>I’ve found that even small cars can be adjusted so tall people can drive them comfortably, although I don’t know about the Echo specifically. My 6’9" H (yes, you read that right) drove a couple of Honda Civics for 15 years, and learned all the adjustment tricks. It may be that the seat and wheel in the Echo can’t be adjusted safely, though, in which case his driving it wouldn’t be a good option in any case.</p>

<p>(Re: vehicles in the driveway – we currently keep our two Priuses (Prii?) in the garage, and the VW van, Accord, and Kawasaki ring the driveway. I kinda like our set of vehicles, it gives me warm fuzzies that each of us has unique tastes. :slight_smile: )</p>

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<p>We had to get D. a car before we wanted to because mine didn’t fit her. They let her take her driver’s test sitting on her Chemistry book so she could see over the wheel, but I didn’t think that was a good long term solution. </p>

<p>One argument in favor of your son having his own car…It sounds like he’s going to spend a lot of time in vehicles with a teenager behind the wheel, whether he’s the driver or not. Statistically, teens who are passengers of teenaged drivers are less safe than the driver is. So if you think your kid will be a good driver, and he’s riding a lot with teenagers anyway, it might make sense to make sure he’s the one behind the wheel.</p>

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<p>My DD has a Subaru Legacy, born two years after her. And I am glad that we did not buy her a newer car as it has taken a couple of hits.</p>

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<p>cangel, seems like only having one kid is much easier isn’t it? When D was 14 W needed a new vehicle and D helped select it knowing full well she would be driving it in less than 2 years. It has always been her car, in that sense. W put 45K on it in 20 months , D put 4,500 on it in 2 years. Now that D is at college W is driving it again in an effort to keep some miles off her truck. W and I drive 25K a year each. </p>

<p>Having that third vehicle is nice and State Farm lets us take D off the policy while she is away from home sans auto. So we keep it.</p>

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<p>For the time being, I would do the car switch up. The SporTrac should be a good fit for your son, and since you don’t mind driving the Echo, that seems like a perfect solution. How does your husband feel about driving the Lexus SUV? If he plays he cards right, he might be the one with the new car before long.:wink: When your daughter returns home from college on breaks, there will need to be some renegotiation, but I’m sure it can all be worked out.</p>

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<p>Answer to the original question? Yes, we have, and on more than one occasion! We currently have seven vehicles, although two of them are with my oldest D and her boyfriend who no longer live with us, and are both working. And yes, we bought both of them. We have three in our garage, one in the driveway, and my H’s ‘baby’ which is in winter storage. A couple of the ones at the house are shared, depending on who happens to be home at the time. Our feeling has always been safety first, and thus none of our cars have been old ‘clunkers’. My H and I both experienced having unsafe first cars and since we were able to afford for our 4 Ds not to have that experience, we felt fortunate. Between the four of them, they’ve had approximately twenty years of driving experience and only one has been involved in an accident. She was rear-ended on the highway and pushed into another vehicle. Her car had over $8,000 damage and we were very happy that she was in a safe car.</p>

<p>We bought the cars for a few different reasons, including convenience which was the main one. One D had a commute of over 1 1/2 hrs. each way to school by public transit and as soon as she had her final license, her commute was cut in half. We also preferred to have our Ds do the driving when out with friends. They all had extensive Drivers’ Ed. lessons and also extensive in car experience with Mom and Dad in the passenger seat, and we felt we would be more at ease with them at the wheel than if a friend was.</p>

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<p>It doesn’t sound as if you need 4 cars. Could you trade the Echo in for something both kids can drive? You may have to pay a couple of dollars, but you won’t have to insure 4 cars.</p>

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<p>Since I know of several kids who have died in situations where an airbag might have saved their lives, I feel very strongly that kids should get the safest, best-handling car in the family, NOT the clunker. My husband and I had much more experience driving; let us drive the risky cars… That said, we bought the kids a Mini to share (6 air bags, great manuverability, good safety test results, easy on gas) but my son ended up driving my husband’s Z3. We’ve ended up using cars as incentives to finish college on time and within original budget; they will get the titles to “their” cars when they graduate in June of this year. We feel that since the car’s value is less than the cost of an extra semester’s tuition, we all win on that one.</p>

<p>So yes, we bought the kids cars. They came with major ropes attached: the requirement to maintain a B average (not easy at their colleges); no speeding tickets; no accidents… And all of that in writing.</p>

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<p>cangel, we solved the prblem by having our S2 chip in for the ‘boy’s’ car when he was 13. They paid for half, we paid for the other half. They share it. It’s a 1996 Japanese station wagon with airbags–and a few mysterious dents in it after six years. One son monopolized it when he was the first to turn 15. The other drove it mostly when his borther went away for GAP and college.</p>

<p>Frankly, if the Echo is safe for your son, I’d tell your daughter to get over herself. A bit rich-- manipulating the family from college?? I wouldn’t open that floodgate if I were you.</p>