<p>JimmyEatWorld, that’s some really good advice, especially about confidence. Like I said in my last post, I’m so used to being “clever girl” to everyone that I can’t imagine that anyone would see anything else, even though that’s only one part of my personality. That’s the trouble with going to a small school where everyone knows (or knows of) you… it’s difficult to break out of stereotypes, once they’re established.</p>
<p>wow Kaine’s elected governor!!! yeh random but i had to say that</p>
<p>Stereotypes scmhereotypes, bah! I havea friends who say exactly the same things. Those people lack self-confidence and don’t like to take risks, that’s it. Really, everyone is gonna fial at something at least once, so take a chance and ask the dude out, straight up and without any subtle hints, and just see what happens.</p>
<p>lol thanks meestasi … you don’t think it would seem creepy to just ask him out of nowhere, considering we barely know each other?</p>
<p>That would be extremely creepy.</p>
<p>That would be creepy. Don’t straight up ask him out till you get to know him a bit.</p>
<p>yeah, that’s what I thought … it seems a bit, erm, forward (stalker-like).</p>
<p>Play the game indirectly…</p>
<p>“Hey, if I can’t get this shot into the basket, I owe you lunch. And if you can’t, then you owe me a lunch. OK?”</p>
<p>“A’ight…”</p>
<p>[She shoots and…misses!]</p>
<p>“I guess I owe you lunch.”</p>
<p>“Yeah shorty, 'bout time I get some grub…”</p>
<p>Match made in heaven.</p>
<p>omg… thats great</p>
<p>lol sr6622 … that’s clever</p>
<p>What I hate is that most of us with brains are, at least at my school, too chicken to ask others out, and we use the excuse that we have too much work to do or are too busy. We do not share our feelings, and upon chance might we ever find out who someone likes, and when we do, that is incredibly scandalous. I also think we are more conscientious in literally everything we do. We fear rejection, simply knowing it will be our demise. When you have AP classes, you tend to be with the same people for more than one class, and you get to know them quite well over the years. That worsens the situation, making it all too personal and gossip-worthy if anyone finds out such a thing.</p>
<p>Try not to be nervous about asking someone out, it took me like 6 months to build up the courage to ask a girl i had known for years to the junior prom last year, and ever since we have been happily dating, i know the fear of rejection can be great, but you might as well give it a try, who knows what could result</p>
<p>oooh…Ask right before Winter break…then, if you get dismissed, you won’t have to go to school knowing that everyone is like</p>
<p>“thisyearsgirl…blah blah blah…”</p>
<p>And, if he does go out with you, then you can chill with him some in Winter break.</p>
<p>You’re all brilliant, haha.</p>
<p>mcz, I think that’s very true. We’ve worked so hard to be unattainable in academics, ECs, and so on–things where we can be in control. In dating there’s an element of unpredictability (the other person’s feelings), and of course I’m generalizing, but I think that can freak us out a little… because we’re so used to being puppet masters that we don’t know what to do when someone else is holding the strings (pardon the analogy; I’m sleep-deprived).</p>
<p>bikerman, thanks for sharing your story. That’s really sweet, and really encouraging. :)</p>
<p>sr6622, that’s another good point. My high school only has 200 students, which means that everyone knows everything everyone else is doing… damage control is a necessity.</p>
<p>Arggh, what’s freindship? Asking out a friend is harder than just asking out a dude you hardly know. Maybe he should know your name and everythign first, but after that I think you really should just ask him straight-up. Whenever I tried to ask a girl out that was my freind, they always provided some lame excuse about “not wanting to mess up the frindship”. Basing it from my experience, after knowing someone for a week, it’s pretty easy to find out if he/she will go out with you, all you really need are the guts to ask someone out.</p>
<p>I totally agree, meestasi. I’ve been friends with a guy for 6+ years now and he’s on math team with me. He’s so smart; the highlight of the day is when he asks me a math question he doesn’t know the answer to and I do (doesn’t happen very often.) So sometimes I get the feeling that he likes me and I’ve had a crush on him in the past, but neither one of us ever has the guts to do anything about it.</p>
<p>this is a very interesting thread…</p>
<p>if you’re still keeping track after all these pgs of responses, i am a girl, and i would date someone below my intelligence level. i consider myself to be fairly smart, so many guys fall into this “range” i’ve made.</p>
<p>basically, i consider intelligence heavily (25% on my scale), and then compatibility, overall personality, etc. the guy has to have a high level of intelligence, but he doesn’t necessarily have to be the valedictorian (personally, i find the overachievers to be dull and too consumed in their academics)</p>
<p>it helps to be interested in the same topics though… my boyfriend is taking ap chem, which i took last year, and that’s definitely something we talk about a lot b/c the teacher is just so bad, and the material isn’t easy… i’m more of a math/science person, and he’s pretty well-rounded (including athletics and social)</p>
<p>Even though I’ve dated someone who’s not as intelligent (just once!) in the past, I’ll probably never do it again. Very witty = a plus (and I don’t find it annoying, it keeps me on my toes). Very arrogant/cocky = sadly, also a bit of a plus, though I can do without. He has to be confident; he’s good and he knows it.</p>
<p>I admit I can be arrogant. I also haven’t dated anyone at my school, nor am I interested in them; one of my guy friends tells me they’re intimidated. I have this attitude of “Guys? Who needs guys? Pooh,” but occasionally, I’ll have this perverse idealization of some guy who is so incredibly intelligent/confident/witty/powerful that it’ll just totally blow me away, and then I’ll happily melt into a puddle of goo. Not that anyone should be able to tell.</p>
<p>I suppose you guys know the secret now. But shh… you didn’t hear it from me. ;)</p>
<p>Not asking for much are you?</p>
<p>I always thought picking a date based on IQ was just as shallow as choosing one based on looks. I always prefered people who were fun and had a nice personality; never cared if they were smater, uglier, prettier, or dumber than me; after all, that’s all so subjective in my opinion.</p>