<p>…get a mohawk? A facial piercing? A tattoo?</p>
<p>Honestly, this is just a question to quell my curiosity. I’m a college student, but when I was a young teenager, my mother took me to get a piercing that I really wanted, and neither of us have looked back. It healed fine, I’m pleased with the aesthetic results, we chose a place that is probably cleaner than my local respected hospital, and I’m still the same high-achieving, straight-A student that I was before I got it done.</p>
<p>What we have found shocking, however, is that when coworkers find out that she allowed me to get a piercing, they react with overwhelming shock and disapproval. Many of these same parents openly allow their children to do everything from fail and skip classes, to drink and do pot. </p>
<p>So, do you parents disapprove of certain styles or body modifications? If you do, does it have to do with concern about employment, and the image that your child puts forth, or is it more of a visceral reaction?</p>
<p>Hair styles never concerned me since it’s hair and it can grow out. But I did draw the line at piercings and tattoos. I told my boys that when they were on their own and self-supporting, they could make those choices for themselves. My oldest S had asked for an ear piercing when he was 13. Now he’s almost 21, and he laughs at the thought that he ever considered doing that and has thanked me for not letting him do it then. My feeling was that some of these things do leave permanent marks, and teenagers often change their minds from day to day.</p>
<p>My H was a survivor of 9/11, and in the first couple months afterward, wanted to get a tattoo of the twin towers on his arm. I would have supported him if he had insisted, but at the time I gently suggested he wait a year to do it. He later decided against wearing a permanent reminder of a day that gave him nightmares for years.</p>
<p>I think at the core of some of this stuff is kids rebelling against … something. So, I would want to have the discussion (ahead of these things) as to what a kid thinks they may be rebelling against. If they want to be on the fringes of what most of their peers are doing then why? </p>
<p>I kind of feel sorry for current teenagers. What can they possibly do that hasn’t already been done by a prior generation? It’s now just rehashed stuff really. As far as tattoos go I like what Jimmy Buffett wrote calling them “permanent memories of a temporary feeling.” If I had a daughter, I’d tell her that hairstyles are temporary but a tramp stamp is pretty much forever.</p>
<p>I’m with Zimmer. I never cared about hair although I did tell my oldest that if she shaved her head it would be harder to apply for a professional job. I am pleased that she never shaved her beautiful red hair off. I tell my kids to think hard about tattoos. I can’t keep the same paint color on the walls of our house longer than four years let alone put something on my body forever.</p>
<p>Facial piercing–I personally hate them. I think they look stupid but if it my kid wanted to get one (after the age of 18), they have every right to get one. I wouldn’t assist the kid to get one and I wouldn’t like it.</p>
<p>Tattoo–As long as it’s not obnoxious, big, or positioned someplace on their body that would hurt their chances of employment, I don’t care. I would probably lecture them (that is, if they bothered to get my approval) about thinking long and hard before putting a permanent mark on their body.</p>
<p>Hair is just hair. The less a parent reacts, the better.</p>
<p>Piercing: I do not even have pierced ears myself. Poking holes in your body for purposes of ornamentation is barbaric. I hope it doesn’t come up.</p>
<p>Tattoos: If I knew about it before hand and the placement or design was going to be regretted, I think I would plan a field trip to the waiting room of a tattoo removal clinic.</p>
<p>Hair…don’t care
Piercing…I know for certain neither of my boys would do it.
Tattoo…Have preached against it for years but oldest S who just graduated college got a tattoo a couple of months ago. He’s 22 and on his own. He didn’t tell me he got it. I just happened to see it when he was working out (shirtless). Thankfully, it is not too large and is on his rib cage so not seen when wearing a shirt. </p>
<p>DH and I recently spent a week at the beach. There were a lot of h.s./college age kids there. We were amazed at the high percentage with tattooes. Some beautiful young ladies had large tattooes that I’m certain they will regret someday soon.</p>
<p>Sexist perhaps; but here is a honest answer. As a man of 50, I haven’t seen a tattoo yet on a woman that I thought enhanced her beauty. Although I admit when I was a young single guy, I told a few that it did.
I’d add that I don’t care for the look on men either.</p>
<p>A good friend of mine who was an excellent student and great person even in high school once asked, “Dad, can I dye my hair blue?” “If you do the dishes,” replied her father… Kind of reflects the opinion that my parents and my friends’ parents all held about what we did with our appearances.</p>
<p>I have an oval-shaped birthmark on the right side of my chest, a couple of inches below my collarbone. It’s light brown and looks like a sideways thumbprint, and is very obvious when I’m wearing anything but the most modest shirts. I’ve toyed with the idea of having ears, nose, whiskers, and a little tail tattooed inconspicuously onto it and making it into an adorable little mouse. My parents and brother all think it’d be fantastic. My husband is the one who is staunchly opposed. (He used to have hair down to his waist, the big ol’ hypocrite!)</p>
<p>My mom suggested that I get my ears pierced when I was in the third grade. I agreed. Never had to ask.</p>
<p>Dyed my hair red once, and my parents thought it was fine. My brother put a blue streak in his hair and looked like an Anime villain for a while, and my mom was disappointed that it faded before she got to see it.</p>
<p>We were pretty much allowed to do whatever we wanted with our appearances, but we never really pushed the boundaries, either.</p>
<p>Now that they are over 18, they can get whatever they want. HOWEVER, I have been strongly preaching to them about the dangers of tongue piercings for a long time, and I doubt they will ever have one of those.</p>
<p>My parents have always had the “your body, your decision” attitude. My sister and I got our ears pierced at the same time, she was 10, I was about 7.</p>
<p>When I was in middle school I wanted a tongue piercing for a little while (I’ll admit, mostly because my brother’s then girlfriend ((who is now his wife)) had one…she later took it out), but I grew out of that particular wish.</p>
<p>When I was 16, I decided I wanted my nose pierced. I asked my mother first. She told me that it was fine with her, but that I had to do lots of research on where I wanted to have it done, I needed to choose a small ring/stud to start with, and it was my responsibility should it become infected.</p>
<p>My dad was somewhat less enthusiastic, but still allowed it. It never got infected, it’s a very small (and, in my opinion, tasteful) stud. I don’t know that I’ll keep it forever, but I really enjoy having it for now. I love my nose, and I like the idea of adding a bit of emphasis to it.</p>
<p>I have now (at 18) decided that I would like to get a very small tattoo on my right ankle (the part that faces towards the left side of my body). Even though I am 18, I did discuss it with my parents. My mom requested that I think about it for at least 6 months, and wait until I had a job and could pay for it myself.</p>
<p>It has now been about a year, and all that is stopping me is that I still don’t have a job or the money to pay for it myself (mom and dad still don’t want to fund it, which doesn’t bother me).</p>
<p>I’d very much discourage getting a tattoo or a piercing. I wouldn’t like the mohawk depending on circumstances (it might make sense if they were a comedian or a clown or something ) but it’s just hair and can grow back out. More pertinent, I’d question/wonder why they wanted to do it in the first place. </p>
<p>
Same here but I know it’s just my personal opinion. Not only do I think it doesn’t enhance, I think it detracts - often greatly. It’s all subjective.</p>
<p>My kids are old enough now that I have no say over what they do with their bodies, but if either of them asked, I would discourage any permanent alterations of parts of the body that show in ordinary summer clothing – with the single, culturally accepted exception of earlobe piercing. I don’t care what they do with their hair. It grows back, and if necessary, an error in judgment can be covered by a wig for a job interview or other formal occasion.</p>
<p>HisGrace, I would suggest that you reconsider the tattoo on your ankle. The person you are 10 or 20 years from now might not want to have a tattoo on a part of the body that is often exposed in public. That person’s boss might not like it, either. If you really want a tattoo, your thigh or midriff might be a better choice because they don’t show when you’re wearing business clothing, but you can choose casual clothing that exposes those areas and shows off the tattoo if you want to.</p>
<p>Marian-part of the reason I chose the ankle is because I really don’t have the body for a thigh or midriff tattoo.</p>
<p>I want to get musical notes, because I know that music is something I will love for my entire life. I also plan to get it on my ankle because I almost always wear pants, so if my profession does require me to cover it, it wouldn’t be too difficult.</p>
<p>Also, quite frankly, if someone in public or my boss judges me because of a tasteful and small tattoo, that person isn’t someone I want to be friends with/be employed by.</p>
<p>I also feel that in my experience, tattoos are becoming more and more acceptable in the workplace as more and more people have them. They’re just not that big of a deal anymore.</p>
<p>“Be friends with” I can agree with. “Be employed by”… Well… be careful about that. In rough economic times, beggars can’t be choosers, and if you end up getting a job that you really love except for the fact that your boss is rather conservative… I just know that I wouldn’t want to have to keep my ankles under wraps all summer long, lest I have to deal with shocked stares from my elders.</p>
<p>At the age of 27, I’m at that young-enough-to-be-in-your-generation-but-old-enough-to-“know-better” point. I have several friends who had planned to get tattoos, were encouraged to wait a year or two, and ultimately concluded that getting a tattoo was kind of like deciding to wear your favorite underwear every day for the rest of your life, as my uncle puts it. The fact that my very level-headed and stubborn friends ultimately changed their minds is the one thing that really put the kibosh on my ink-lust. I find that henna satisfies my need for expressing myself without getting me into any sort of long-term commitments, so I do that on vacations.</p>
<p>Waiting’s not necessarily a bad thing. Meanwhile, draw in a couple of eighth notes with a Sharpie and wear it around for a while! ;)</p>
<p>I have done both henna and drawing what I want with a Sharpie. This isn’t something I decided one night and went out and did the next day. It’s something I’ve thought about for almost a year now.</p>
<p>I understand the whole employment thing…but again, I think by the time I’ve finished my 5 more years of school plus 3,000 hours of supervised clinical work, it won’t be quite as big of an issue. And if I’m wrong, I’ll deal with that if/when I come to it.</p>
<p>younghoss and uscd dad, I am betting that those women are not worrying about that! For a lot of people who have copious tattoos, it’s more like a tribal marker. Ever notice that people who have lots of tattoos tend to hang together?</p>
<p>I always wanted a tattoo and planned to get one when I turned 40 but could never get past the whole needle thing. Now that I’m a little <em>ahem</em> older, the thought of having ink on progressively wrinkled skin just doesn’t have that “rebel without a cause” look I’m aiming for.</p>
<p>I started a tattoo thread a while ago- still haven’t gotten one- I like to take my time deciding.
I don’t think tattoos are a big deal- I wouldn’t get my * face* tattooed, but I am also not doing it to " enhance" my beauty" no offense meant.
I would do it because * I * wanted to.
THe same as when I had a breast reduction ( although I am still quite tickled at the reaction of a 20 year old classmate ( male) who just could not conceive of any woman getting her breasts made * smaller* ROFL
My husband didn’t mind the reduction and while he doesn’t really want me to get a tattoo- he knows there is a much bigger list of things that he does that I could complain about
I wasn’t thinking of a small one- more medium sized- on my deltoid/shoulder- so you would only see it, if I had a sleeveless top on- as I am a landscaper- and I was thinking of some sort of earth/peony/tree theme- it would be appropriate and show when I had my work clothes on.
oh- my 18 year old got a tattoo as soon as she turned 18- I haven’t seen her since she turned 19, but I think she is planning on getting another. ( hers is small and on her shoulder blade)</p>
) but it’s just hair and can grow back out. More pertinent, I’d question/wonder why they wanted to do it in the first place. </p>