I actually prefer to go to museums by myself.
I am also someone who believes that you don’t need an entourage to travel and tour and I much prefer going to museums either alone or with DH or older D as we have a good vibe plus one of her undergrad degrees is in Art History so we usually have some really great conversations following our visits.
As long as you are careful and aware of what is going on around you, Madrid is easy and save to spend time in. As with many other cities such as Rome and Barcelona it is well-known as a place for pickpockets so you must always be aware and alert. Toledo is awesome place to visit for a weekend as would a day trip to El Escorial.
If you can join her for week that would be great.
My kids are already older than I was when I backpacked Europe solo (I was 17). Kind of a wonder my mom let me do it, but she did.
@“aunt bea”, my kid was stuck far off campus (long public transit ride) in a sublet studio in a dicey neighborhood. She had a hard time making friends (and she is literally one of the most happy, social people I know). Things that helped her:
- She learned to cook, and explored her city buying ingredients for stuff she wanted to try
- Her boyfriend came to visit for a week --his parents bought him a plane ticket as an early Christmas gift when he asked them to after he realized how badly her experience was going. (She later told me that this act of kindness in his part was what made her realize that he was “the one” – they are still happily together 6 years later).
- She sought out friends among other foreign students. She couldn’t get traction with students from the host country even though she spoke the language, but ended up being friendly with some students from other countries.
- She traveled to another country to visit friends who were abroad there on a break
- She ended up taking an extra couple of classes. She found the coursework easier than her US college, so added more classes to keep busy.
I think there is nothing wrong with visiting and helping her get more settled in. I was with my D for the first week (we traveled, and got her banking, phone, and Internet access sorted) and I think that helped a lot.
@“aunt bea” I’m sorry your daughter is having a rough time, but I do want to allay your fears about Madrid. I lived there for a month – and I never once felt unsafe. Yes, you need to be careful about your belongings and avoid getting drunk, but that’s no different than in any big city. Madrid has a wonderful metro system that is crowded and busy into the wee hours of the morning. In fact, the streets are teaming with people throughout the night – it feels very safe. I speak no Spanish, but I survived just fine. I hope she can settle in and enjoy the city, because it does have wonderful museums and parks and things to do.
“Even without the safety issue who wants to travel alone. Traveling is better when you have someone to share the experience with.”
One of the big perks of my job was that I did get to travel and see great parts of the world by myself. I could set my own agenda, get up at the crack of dawn if I wanted, eat when I wanted, spend hours in a museum if I wanted to or bag it if I didn’t - honestly, it was very enjoyable to see a lot of the world by myself, and I didn’t feel lonely at all.
Another solo traveler here. When I do travel with family or friends these days, I often find myself longing for the ability to please myself without compromising to accommodate my companions! Some have mentioned solo meals as being lonely. I generally exhaust myself by trying to see it all during the day and am very glad for simple downtime in the evening. Another solo traveler friend taught me that I did not have to search out a restaurant each evening if I didn’t want to. Once liberated from that notion, I’ve been happier. I often go for a more formal, larger lunch and want little other than a snack in the evening.
My 21-year-old daughter traveled alone throughout Spain and Portugal over spring break. She is fluent in French but speaks no Spanish. She did fine, never felt unsafe and saw a lot. She did get lonely but insisted she wanted to travel alone. It wasn’t a matter of my “letting” her do it, she’s an adult.
I’ll be going to Spain soon!
She’s very happy that I will be traveling to see her and fix a couple of things!
Thanks everyone!
Thanks especially to @2collegewego, we took a lot of your suggestions!
@aunt bea that is great that you are able to go and help her. And hopefully the two of you will have some time to see some great things together as well. Safe travels!
@“aunt bea” - Great news! I’m sure your D will be forever grateful. Enjoy your time together!
Awesome, auntbea! My kid got scolded for not wearing high heels to work by her coworkers. So she begged me to send her some boots and stuff, because the prices at their local mall were outrageous. I looked how much it would have cost to ship stuff to my kid in her fashion capital of the world and then checked the price of the airfare… The difference was so small, that I packed 2 large bags with goodies for her and off I went. It was worth every penny! 
Enjoy your trip!
I’m so glad you are able to go visit your daughter Aunt Bea! I know she will be grateful and you will feel so much better. Enjoy your time!
My son just left Madrid to go to Ibiza but spent time in Madrid both with friends and on his own. He said he felt very safe, although his phone was stolen while there. Other than that he said as long as you use common sense it is safe. He did say that people were much friendlier when he spoke Spanish instead of English. Even though his Spanish is So. Calif./Mexico Spanish, he felt people appreciated him making the effort.
Have a wonderful trip!!!
Aunt Bea, I hope your flights go more smoothly than hers did. Give us an update when you have seen her.
@rosered55, I hope your friend’s daughter will be safe. I completely understand. I’m really sorry to have taken over the thread!
FYI: I will be flying out in a week and ½, more for my piece of mind and to try to rebook her and find a closer place to her internship. I needed to get a good route/ airfare and have time to find light, loose fitting clothing for her.
Someone did attempt to rob her two days ago, at an ATM, but another gentleman intervened by pushing the guy away. She was too shocked to say anything to the rescuer. She waited to tell us so I am having a hard time sleeping. Hence my posts at all odd hours.
Oh, @aunt bea. I am wishing all the blessings in the world for you and your daughter. I am glad she is safe - thank goodness for the presence of the other person.
My 21 year old daughter just came home after a full year abroad, six weeks in England last summer followed by an academic year and then two months of work in Provence. She lived alone when she was working in England and did quite a lot of traveling (and hiking) by herself. Once she got to France, she lived with a French family, but when she traveled during the breaks, she would sometimes take the train alone to meet friends in other cities.
You can’t prevent bad things from happening, but you can teach your child to deal with them when they do. Be alert; guard your passport; use ATMs in brightly lit areas; be on guard against pickpockets; walk with purpose and confidence in tourist areas; don’t flash wealth or status; know the scams, ruses and dangers that are particular to an area (gypsies handing out leaflets in Paris, for example, or drunken football hooligans in York), and leave a copy of your itinerary with friends when you are traveling. The most common dangers are theft and assault. Terror attacks are much rarer.
Would I let my young-adult child travel alone in Europe right now?
I can’t keep my young adult children from traveling alone. They are adults.
Would I be happy and encouraging? No. I am not encouraging travel at this point.
My family has traveled fairly extensively world wide-- including kids by themselves to Europe.
Life, politics, circumstances have an ebb and flow. I’ll wait for a calmer tide.
My mid-twenties daughter returned recently from a year working in Asia. She lived alone the entire time and traveled throughout Asia and the South Pacific most weekends. As @Massmom said you can’t prevent trouble, but you can help your child learn to deal with things that happen. She is a VERY experienced traveler all the way back to much travel in her youth sport, a semester overseas in college, and her current job, so I trusted that she knew how to take care of herself. And I agree the run of the mill issues like ATM robberies are far more likely than terrorism.
Was I worried at times?..Absolutely, but she is a grown up and I must trust her choices. I did ask her to check in weekly to confirm she was fine. It is odd, she is now back at her US home base across the continent from me, and in a huge city, but somehow it’s less worrisome than when she was half a world away.
I didn’t mean to imply LGA is any more dangerous than any other airport, but I think ALL airports are at risk right now and warned my daughter to move as swiftly through security as possible. In Denver, there are two big ‘pits’ to snake through the lines of security, and then pass through TSA, descend to the lower level and board the trains to the concourses. That area scares me as you are just trapped and couldn’t hide if an emergency situation happened. There is a third option that takes you across a bridge to the trains. I like that option better. Not perfect, but better.
I know that in the grand scheme of things, the airport terminals are safe, but this daughter traveling was at the Turkey airport that had the trouble a few weeks ago. She only missed the trouble by 1.5 years! Irrationally, I worry. I also have an irrational fear of travel by escalator. I was crazy about my kids standing still, not touching the railing, stepping off quickly, not playing near them. Possibility of being hurt is tiny, but I still made my kids stand still to further reduce the possibility of injury. Same with airports. Risk is minimal, but I want to cut it down even more by not loitering by the check in counters or security lines. Move safely to the interior concourses.
I’m a mother. It is my job to worry. About escalators and airports and everything else. My kids worry about nothing.