<p>I’d like some feedback form some of you who are teachers and have had occassion to write rec letters…
I sponsor an EC activity, and occasionally write rec letters for “my” kids for various programs. I get to know the kids very well, and generally enjoy writing the letters. In the fall, for the first time, I am going to be writing letters for multiple kids (3) all applying to basically the same colleges. They all have very distinct personalities, and have faced very different circumstances in their lives. But academically in my subject, they are all about the same. They are all very strong, solid students who would do well at the colleges to which they are applying. But I can’t say that any of them are “the best in my career”. My “career” to date has only included about 40 kids, but 2 of them have been truly extraordinary on a national scale, way beyond what most teachers would have the good fortune to experience in a career.</p>
<p>I can imagine that there are teachers who might have 10-15 students all applying to the same college(s) and having similar academic ability. How do they distinguish among those students in their letters? I can certainly do that if I get very personal about each one, but a lot of that seems pretty irrelevant and private, or seems like it would unfairly prejudice against the kid (Asperger traits). One of the colleges all 3 will be applying to is a college which one of my students already attends and where another will be starting this fall. I can compare and contrast the heck out of the 3 new applicants in relationship to the 2 kids the college will already have. Is that ever done? Other random thoughts and comments about how “real” teachers approach this?</p>
<p>I’ll wade in as a teacher who tends to write from my heart (the mama in me). I have suffered from your dilemma and I don’t really think there is “the” answer to your question. You do the best you can. I usually write about 10 recs/yr, last year it was 15 (I just couldn’t say no to some amazing kids). Each student sits down with me for an interview (even though I may know them extremely well already) to discuss why they think colleges X,Y,Z are for them and vice-versa. I make every effort to relate my observations of their character, accomplishments, and future potential to their beliefs about their fit with a college on their list. I do not shy away from personal or sensitive issues if I have discussed my intentions with my student and if it is relevant to illuminate an appropriate trait or circumstance in a positive light. For letters going to the same school, I make every effort to differentiate each student by providing unique anecdotes of classroom experiences that would be of interest to the admissions readers that will hopefully set them apart from each other in their eyes. Last year for the first time, I wrote recs for two students to the highly selective LAC my D was attending as a freshman. These two students were so academically identical (both female, both NMF, both interested in the sciences), but with incredibly different personalities. The school was a fit for both. Since I was extremely familiar with the college, I picked out many of their programs and activities that fit each in their own way and those that would benefit from their presence and related them to each one’s particular potential. While I was forthcoming about my connection to the college, I did not compare or contrast with my D. I think you should use your knowledge about the school, rather than your former students, in your rec.</p>
<p>Maize & Blue - thanks. Your experience is particularly apt because one of the 2 kids who will already be attending one of the college these 3 are applying to is my son.</p>
<p>btw - how would others handle the Aspergers kid? He’s the smartest of the 3, but the most problematic. He’s a fundamentally nice kid who wants to have friends and fit in, but has difficulty figuring out how. I have known him for several years, and he has hugely improved. But I’m really at a loss for how to handle the “how does the student work with others?” question.</p>
<p>I feel for the kid. We have a nephew who is borderline Aspergers and has trouble making friends and working with others. He is also very bright.
I think you need to be truthful and say basically what you’ve said: that he has some Asperger’s but has hugely improved. If you have instances where he has shown this improvement, all the better. Some schools emphasize the social qualities of applicants more than others. You may also want to urge him to check into the support services of the schools he is interested in.</p>
<p>I would be VERY careful about the use of the specific term “Asperger’s,” since there is controversy, even among specialists, about the nuances involved in diagnosing individuals along the “autistic spectrum.”</p>
<p>Unless he has been formally diagnosed by a specialist AND he and his parents have given explicit permission to you to share the diagnosis, I would avoid using the term “Asperger’s” in your letter.</p>
<p>Instead, I would be inclined to write describing the challenges and difficulties he has faced and overcome in becoming a valued contributor to the intellectual community in your ec.</p>
<p>I agree with Marite that it is a very good idea to talk to him and his parents about checking into support services. (I know of one case of a diagnosed high-functioning autistic student whose mother accompanied him to his first meeting with his academic advisor to make sure that a good rapport was established from the beginning. It seemed to get him off to a very good start and he has been doing well for several years at a very demanding college.)</p>
<p>Before you write the letter, I would also be very frank in talking to him and to his parents about any reservations you feel an obligation to share in writing your recommendation. If you don’t feel you can write a very strong letter, given your concerns, I think you should let them know and give him the option of seeking another letter writer. (Also, if you are going to raise concerns in your letter, it’s good for him to know about it, so that he can address those concerns in his essays and perhaps in getting other supporting letters as well.)</p>
<p>Further thoughts: bear in mind that admissions committee members have an exhausting chore of reading hundreds of folders, that their eyes have a tendency to glaze over after hours of reading, and that many letters of recommendation are pretty much indistinguishable from one another. Vivid descriptions of memorable anecdotes about the applicant really help a candidate to come alive.</p>
<p>I would not use the specific term Aspergers even if he had been formally diagnosed, which he has not. It’s just my impression. I used it here as a shorthand, rather than go into specific details. I genuinely like this kid, and want to treat this issue sympathetically.</p>
<p>Texas - Writing recs for the students who applied to my D’s school actually turned out to be quite easy. The words just leaped onto the page. For example, since my D has joined the women in science and math group, I described how one of my students would fit right in and take on leadership positions because of her passion in that area. For the other, more athletic, student, I was able to talk about how she would contribute to one of the more obscure athletic groups on campus and perhaps start something that currently wasn’t available on campus due to experience she had during high school. All this because my D gave me some insight.</p>
<p>As for the Aspergers issue, I have first-hand experience with something similar. My own children and DH have a genetic neurological condition which we did not particularly want to call attention to or dwell on when it came to college apps and essays (some research even indicates that Aspergers/autism may be associated with our family’s syndrome). The public school GC, who knew my D very well, insisted upon mentioning some of her issues even though she did not need any accommodations, was val, and most people had no idea she has this particular syndrome. As it turns out, our fear of the negative was unfounded. My D ended up writing a powerful whimsical and humorous essay providing insight into her “quirky” personality derived from her observable symptoms while the GC put her accomplishments in light of her symptoms. There was no way anyone could possibly feel sorry for her.</p>
<p>Work with your student and the GC to see how your rec might shed additional light upon the big picture. If the student or GC will not be mentioning his syndrome or his difficulties, then I would stay away from it too.</p>