<p>inner voice 1 (while looking at pics of my overnight visit host at a davenport '12 wine and cheese parties): i love cheese. i love yale. wine, er, is an acquired taste. I will acquire it. When I go to Yale. IF i go to yale. omg, 12/15 is in 13 days. noooooo. i have to get in. i must get in. omg i’m going to kill myself if i don’t get in. die die die die die die die…
inner voice 2: stop saying that.
inner voice 1: i wonder if an overdose will do it? crystal meth is easy to OD on, or so i’ve read. i’ve always wanted to make crystal meth anyway… why else would I be in organic chem? now where is that recipie?
inner voice 2: yasmin, STOP.
inner voice 1: or maybe something more dramatic, so i’ll be on the news and yale will feel guilty…like hanging myself naked with the words YALE MARTYR sprayed in yale blue on my midriff.
inner voice 2:SERIOUSLY YASMIN STOP JOKING AROUND. DEATH IS NOT FUNNY.
inner voice 1: no, i really will kill myself, and there’s nothing you or prozac can do about it.
inner voice 2:you know, just because you don’t get into yale doesn’t mean you aren’t going to college.
inner voice 1:<em>confused pause</em>
inner voice 2: you do know that, no matter what, you’re going to college?
inner voice 1: oh, yeah. forgot.</p>
<p>I keep imagining myself getting accepted… then I imagine myself getting rejected… then I try to prepare myself for that by saying it’s probably going to happen… and I kind of know that I’m slightly trying to reverse jinx it (although I really am not confident about my chances)… and then I think I’m jinxing it by thinking about reverse jinxing it… then I realize I’m crazy. Glad to see I’m not the only one.</p>
<p>hahah i don’t think yale realizes that their yield would be higher if they didn’t put some of the applicants into an asylum with all the unbearable waiting. i was saying to my dad that maybe i already got into yale because the admissions committee starts reviewing today. and then i had to knock on wood. i knocked on a chair for like 5 minutes and my knuckles hurt. :D</p>
<p>TheWerg, EXACTLY! I told you we were long-lost siblings…
Here’s my mental breakdown (as in… statistically, not the devastating kind)
40% of my thoughts are worrisome ones about Yale
40% is about schoolwork
10% is about other college apps
the remainder is divided amongst eating, sleeping, and how tired I am.</p>
<p>hahaha… i definitely knock on everytime someone says “oh, you’ll get in” or i think about the slight possibility of me getting in.</p>
<p>i also have those moments when i catch myself imagining the sense of overwhelming relief if i get into yale… and then i curse, because i know (realistically) my chances are pretty much non existent. and then i try so hard to convince myself that i won’t get in, and that life moves on. and everything happens for a reason…</p>
<p>I agree with mistoofthekane…I wish I didn’t love Yale as much as I do. I wish I had another school that I would turn to and be “yay!!” But as of now, I don’t. I have NO IDEA what when I get rejected. I’ll have to force myself to fall in love, heh. sighh*</p>
<p>I think everyone eventually falls in love with a school, even if it’s not their top choice. Even if it’s your state flagship. At least most people.</p>
<p>I had a friend who was rejected from Yale eventually and thought it was the end of the world. He now goes to Cal Berkeley, and loves it. Wouldn’t have it any other way.</p>
<p>yeah, but from what I can gather, people fall in love with their schools AFTER they matriculate…(or is that just a mihan misconception??). It’s just that Yale is so far above my other schools to which I’m applying - Brown and Rice are pretty chill, though ; )</p>
<p>Well yeah. You go there thinking you’re going to hate it, how it’s not YALE. Hm this reminds me another acquaintance who thought Yale was a match, but ended up at LSU. She thought she would ignore everyone there and just concentrate on her studies, but now she loves, loves, loves it.</p>
<p>yeah, I have no real second fav. I told my dad that if I don’t get in (knock on wood), then eff it, I’ll just go to WashU because they’ll give me financial aid. </p>
<p>but that was before when I was more confident. Now that rejection is impending, i feel like i need to stop being melodramatic and find the second choice that will be best for me. The truth is, I’m not getting financial from most schools (except the merit aid ones and hopefully yale) because we don’t really need it, and my parents need to suck it up and pay for my happiness. </p>
<p>I liked Williams a lot, but it’s so small/isolated, but i’ll have to visit again to make sure. I liked Brown a lot before I did an official visit, but maybe it was just the lameo tour guide and crappy info session that turned me off. Scripps is really nice…and they give financial aid…but maybe if i get deferred/rejected i’ll suck it up and apply to Pomona too. WashU is really nice too, but the social scene is a bit too fragmented for me. Dartmouth might be the place for me, but I’m worried about my parents having to pay full price. This whole situation is a ridiculous paradox. And the answer is I NEED TO GO TO YALE.</p>
<p>princessbell: OMG, same with me and WashU!!! (Though I’m not as confident as you are about getting in or getting the merit aid…)
But what do you mean about the “fragmented” social scene? I like that there’s lots of breadth in it so something for everyone but I didn’t think of it as “fragmented.” Explain, please (sorry if this is blasphemy to the Yale forum!).</p>
<p>well first off, I just really like the word fragmented. it’s really nice.</p>
<p>but anyway, i visited for discovery weekend, and it was fun, but i found a couple things very strange. 1) the south 40-cool idea, but it is SOOO far away from everything else. it seems like it would be tough to make friends with upperclassmen 2)lots of self-segregation. i’m not stupid, i know it happens everywhere, but it was to the point where my host said “all the black people know each other. we look for other black people wherever we go because we have to stick together”. i found that ridiculous. 3) self-segregation cotd. all the black people and all the asian people sat together in the really packed late night cafeteria place</p>
<p>there’s soo much more. I felt a more inclusive atmosphere at Yale and other east coast schools than in the Midwest. it mostly matters to me because i’m black, and i don’t want to have to choose between hanging out with only minorities or only white people. i had a lot of fun, but i’m not sure i could deal with the weirdness for 4 whole years. otherwise, wash u is really amazing. </p>
<p>i feel really confident about the scholarships because i already did an interview for the ervin, which went really well, and they flew me to campus for free, i’ve showed loads of intrest and i’m applying to rodriguez and ervin so even if i get half-scholarships from both or even less, it’ll still be really cheap.</p>
<p>Same with me princessbell on the Brown thing. It was my first choice until I took a tour and something about the campus just didn’t click. Then again, I took the tour the day after my Yale tour, and that was pretty much love at first sight.</p>