<p>Oh come on, you know you love me :). But really, first let me say thanks to all of the ones out there who give me advice every time I get down or get stressed.</p>
<p>I was thinking last night when I couldn’t sleep. I applied for CCC and I’m thinking I’m gonna get in there. I did my app about the beginning of the year for spring of 09. But then I started to question myself…do I really wanna leave that far from home…let me give you a back story.</p>
<p>In 1996(when I was 6) my dad left me,my mom and my sister, then eventually my sister left so for a long time its been me and mom. Ever since my dad she hasn’t dated…felt betrayed I assume…anyways…Id say I have a big heart…leading me to not want to leave my mom alone…</p>
<p>What do I do? Follow my dreams? Stay home and go to a community college.</p>
<p>I really feel like if/when (hopeful) get into CCC it can be a life changing experience. Chicago is one of the biggest theatre cities in the US and its alot different from the lil country town I’m use to. It really gives me the chance to become a professional actor but then get a BA to teach with.</p>
<p>I know it’ll be hard to leave home, I mean duh, I love my lil country town but I just wonder…</p>
<p>ohernjr8, I was divorced 12 years ago, and I have never dated. There are many reasons, but the main one is that I have devoted myself 100% to my children. I also live in a very small country town, and frankly there are no men around who interest me. And now, after this many years, I am way too independent to want someone telling me what to do! LOL. Your mom may have similar reasons or maybe not. </p>
<p>Even though I have devoted myself to my children and their activities (and loved every minute of it), I am so proud of my daughter for pursuing her dream. I wouldn’t have it any other way. I want her to fly without looking back; that’s why I have supported her musical talents since she was little. Although she is only 235 miles away, she will not be coming home at all this semester (too busy), and doesn’t plan to come home this summer. I will miss her, sure, but she has to leave the nest and make her own way.</p>
<p>My non-MT son is graduating from high school in May, and I want him to go off and experience college and figure out what he wants to do in life. He, however, wants to stay home and go to the local community college. That is ok, too, because that is his choice. But it’s not because he doesn’t want to leave me. It has been just he and me for the past three years since his sister went off to college, but, without sounding mean, I really am looking forward to being on my own someday! I want to get a smaller house, and work two jobs to pay off college loans and save for retirement. </p>
<p>My point is, you have to do what is best for you. Don’t worry about your mom. She knows you love her, and she has known since the day you were born that you would be 18 someday and would leave her nest. It will be an adjustment for both of you, but you can’t give up on CCC (if you get in) just because you don’t want to leave your mom alone. She’s a big girl. Talk to her about it. I’m sure she will understand. </p>
<p>I think you need to sit down and have a heart to heart with your mom. Are you feeling responsible for your Mom and her happiness? Do you know for certain that she wants you to stay around and in the process, abaondon part of your dream and life experience? She may be absolutely accepting of you moving away. Then again, she may not. If not, you have the right to know why. What comments has she made so far? Does she know where you’re applying? And then you 2 need to sort it out. A counselor, at school or private, can help if it gets to be too much. As parents I think our job is to give children the education and skills to fly - but every parent is different. It sound like you are close, so talk. You might be (pleasantly) surprised. Bottom line, and I don’t mean to sound harsh at all, really - you aren’t responsible for her happiness any more than my daughters are responsible for mine. I am . You sound mature and thoughtful and you deserve the best MT experience you can get. Keep us posted and crossing our fingers on CCC!!!</p>
<p>ohernjr8- I’m in almost the exact same boat as musicmom1215. My husband died 9 years ago, my daughter is off pursuing mt at BoCo and my son is a senior in high school. I want him to go off to college, just as I wanted my d to go. I would never want them stay back for me. I devoted these years to them, alone, because I wanted to. I am also ready for my son to take to his wings and fly off into the real world. I wouldn’t want to hold him back. Talk to your mom. Follow your dreams. Your mom, I can GUARANTEE, is a strong woman who has seen this coming and wants you to be happy, above everythnig else. That’s what we, moms, do best!!!</p>
<p>By all means I want to go to CCC and get a good BFA and use that. But I just hang onto that fear of my mom being alone. Thanks for all of your advice.</p>
<p>This is a joint post - I’m sitting here with my daughter. </p>
<p>Me- Everyone calls us the Gilmore Girls because we are best friends. I was widowed 5 yrs ago and ever since my daughter has concentrated on going to college she has been trying to fix me up with some man afraid of leaving me alone. Well trust me…I can find men on my own if that is what I want. Actually without her around, I might have more desire and chance to find one! </p>
<p>Her - My daughter says she is scared of my being alone. She is afraid I will get lonely. And because we are so close she is going to miss her best friend. But she also realizes that there is going to come a day when she grows up, gets married, has her own house and kids and that day has to come someday anyway. Besides she can’t be on Broadway staying here living with me forever. </p>
<p>Me again- One of my favorite sayings is you give your kids 2 things - one is roots, the other is wings. This is the wing part. If she wasn’t able to make it on her own I’d feel like somehow I’d failed in raising her. She is right…when she marries someday I have no desire or intent to live with her and my future son in law so the day has to come someday. And besides, it’s better I start this new life while I’m younger - so I can still attract those men she is always trying to fix me up with. </p>
<p>Pursue your dream - talk to your Mom. I’m sure she knows how much you love her. And I’m sure as a Mom all she needs is to see you happy.</p>
<p>Hey, I’m in about the same situation you are, and I thought my mom wouldn’t know what to do with herself when I left. I said that to her one day, and she gave me a verbal list of all the things she was going to do when I left, (mostly craft projects that can just sit out in the family room when my friends and I aren’t here) and I realized she would be fine. She doesn’t want to date until she retires and moves to where she wants to retire to, but she will be fine, I know!</p>
<p>I’m not afraid of leaving her alone. I’m afraid of her being alone…does that make sense…at all? By all means…I’m not one of the people thats like “I’m going to college…graduate…then star on brodway…” I just want my BFA then I will return and teach.</p>
<p>I’m starting to question my commitment to CCC. A part of me wants to leave my nest but a part wants to go close to home. But I can always transfer right? If I want to apply for Spring of 09 is it to late to apply to state colleges and audition. I really have no clue. :[</p>
<p>I was of a similar philosophy. I had/have some family stuff holding me back as well. So I decided to “settle” at CSUF. Its local, its cheap, and I’m living a home. But what I discovered is that, as much as you can try to trick yourself into being happy in a place that you don’t belong, there will always be that feeling in your gut that there is something missing. </p>
<p>My opinion is simply, go with your gut. The best opportunity will present itself. I am transferring from CSUF because it is not where I belong. I know that I will be happier wherever I end up because, for the first time, I am making decisions that will make me happy.</p>
<p>PM me. I think we could have a lot to talk about.</p>