<p>I have an almost 16 year old brother, who is much younger than I am. When he turns 16 he is planning to get a driver’s license. He already has a permit.</p>
<p>My parents are not planning to get him a car. Their plan is to use the existing 2 cars and share it between three of them. </p>
<p>Because of my DH’s business, we have many cars that he gets for free or nominal fee and then makes necessarily repairs. Those are not junk cars. These are the cars, that usually require a major repair which his clients are not willing to invest in. After my H repairs the cars, he uses those cars as loaners. From time to time he accumulates too many of them and then he sells off extras. </p>
<p>I was planning to ask my H, if I can give one of the cars to my brother for his 16th birthday. I know my brother would be happy with the present, because he was mentioning to my H that he is not looking forward to drive my mom’s car. However, I am thinking that my parents might not like this, due to insurance costs that they will now have to pay. On the other hand, they will be saving quite a lot money by accepting a car that they don’t have to pay for. </p>
<p>I don’t speak to my dad and my mom defers to my dad regarding all decisions. So my question is, how would you react if someone gave your child a used car in a fairly nice condition with no major issues?</p>
<p>As a parent, there are many costs that go into a vehicle:</p>
<p>1) Insurance
2) Gas
3) Maintenance.</p>
<p>Cars that require major repairs may require more major repairs in the future, and these cars clearly have low value if the clients are more interested in giving away cars rather than repairing them.</p>
<p>Who would pay for future repairs and maintenance?</p>
<p>
</p>
<p>These are cars with little known service history, maintenance history, and came from people who were likely unable to afford significant maintenance. I think “fairly nice condition with no major issues” would be a bit of stretch.</p>
<p>I don’t think it’s appropriate to give something like a car to your brother without your parent’s approval. It’s possible that the parents want to be more in control of when the car is available for your brother, and a car of his own might take some of their options away. It’s not really your place to interfere with what could be seen by them as a parent’s perrogative.
If the parents approve, then great. Or when your bro turns 18, great.
Although he’ll have to have the means for insurance and maintenance for it to avoid becoming a burden to your parents.</p>
<p>If you decide you’d like to do this, ask your mom to confer with your dad. Don’t create friction by mentioning it to your brother unless it’s ok’d by them.</p>
<p>lerkin, I did this many years ago for a younger sibling who was an undergrad. Didn’t think of clearing it with my parents first, but for a 16 year old I certainly would.</p>
<p>I want to clarify something about conditions of the cars: When my husband is done with them, they are in a great running condition with no major problems. In the past, he gave a car to my SIL - she has been driving it for 3 years with no problems and also to his parents - no problems there too after driving a car for a year. They are still driving those cars.</p>
<p>As far as why people get rid of the car - the engine rebuild can cost them around $3K, so they get $500 from my husband in exchange for the old car and get themselves a new car somewhere else. My husband and I might not think their decision is wise, but they do.</p>
<p>Routine maintenance (like oil changes) will be free (done by my husband). More costly maintenance - like transmission flush - would be at cost.</p>
<p>The problem is that rebuilding the engine doesn’t mean that the anti lock brakes won’t stop working in the future. Or that the transmission won’t require a rebuild. Or that the air conditioning will work for another 20,000 miles. Or the gas gauge won’t stop working. Or any of a number of things.</p>
<p>I’m not at all saying that your husband doesn’t do a good job of working on the cars - what I’m saying is that it is very difficult or impossible to predict future vehicle maintenance. It might happen. Or it might not.</p>
<p>Leaving aside any dispute about whether these are or are not reliable cars after lerkin’s husband has finished rehabilitating them, there could be plenty of non-automotive reasons why her parents might not want her brother to have his own car.</p>
<p>I cannot imagine a circumstance in which I would think it was a good idea to give a 16-year-old a car without clearing it first with his parents.</p>
<p>To me this seems somewhat like gifting an expensive pet. Yes, the pet costs a chunk of change to buy, but that’s generally one of the smallest expenses of actually owning and maintaining a pet.</p>
<p>Could it also be the parents want to limit the kid’s ability to drive and feel this would be much more difficult if they had a third car?</p>
<p>According to my mom, my dad was thinking of getting a third car until my mom decided that due to the difference in their work schedules (my mom has regular office job, while my dad works at night and mostly on weekends) it will be doable to have only two cars. My dad then was very happy to save money.</p>
<p>I would have talked to my mom regarding this, but it just irritates me the way she responds to everything. I get super-annoyed that she does not have any opinion of her own. </p>
<p>I also need to ask my H first about availability of the car. However, if I ask him and he chooses a car, then I don’t want to go back and say that my parents don’t want it. On the other hand, if I ask my parents first and then there is no car available - I don’t want to give my dad a reason to bad-mouth me. </p>
<p>Yes, I have “wonderful” relationship with my parents!</p>
<p>P.S. My parents can still limit the car usage, even if there is a 3rd car. I was planning to transfer a title in my mom’s name, not my brother’s.</p>
<p>I agree it’s WRONG to even offer a VERY EXPENSIVE liability to a child WITHOUT parent’s approval. I am getting quotes for our D to get auto insurance. She got her license at age 21, has had 1 ticket, but otherwise has a good driving record. Quotes range from $1800 to over $4000/year. She has taken a driver’s ed course and is a full-time student. I believe a younger male’s quote would be MUCH higher.</p>
<p>Even if the car is free, these expenses are NOT trivial and need to be considered, in addition to the added liability of a young person operating a vehicle that can cause death and destruction, especially in the hands of an inexperienced driver.</p>
<p>Definitely check with the kid’s parents about whether THEY want another vehicle in their household, and if so, how that can best be accomplished.</p>
<p>It makes no sense to offer a vehicle if you don’t know if one is available. On the other hand, it is unfortunate that your H would be annoyed if he chose a vehicle and your folks decided they didn’t want it. (We actually have turned down two used cars because they had mechanical issues that we weren’t interested in resolving to our satisfaction, even though the vehicles were in OK running condition & had been driven by the prior owners.) Only you can figure out how to negotiate the dance between your folks and your H, but don’t get the kid involved AT ALL until & unless it’s been agreed to by ALL adults involved.</p>
<p>This is an item that has too many large implications for you to just give it to your minor brother without the consent of the parents. The implications are many including cost (gas, insurance, maintenance, repairs), safety, control (your bro might feel entitled to whatever he wants anytime with ‘his’ car but your parents might feel otherwise), reward/punishment, etc.</p>
<p>Check with the parents and get the okay first before giving him something like this.</p>
<p>Given all of the above, it’s very nice of you to be willing to do this for your bro.</p>
<p>Life often involves questions like these - you have to feel out the situation and then talk to the parties involved. In this case, you are proposing a question that you have talked with neither the giver of the vehicle nor the guardians of the recipient of the gift.</p>
<p>First, find out if the car is available. Then talk with Dad.</p>
<p>“So my question is, how would you react if someone gave your child a used car in a fairly nice condition with no major issues?”</p>
<p>I’d be insulted … and miffed. Better plan: Tell your Mom that DH has a few “extras” at present, and that DH would be willing to sell one to your brother “very reasonably.” Then butt out.</p>
<p>Why don’t you just level with your Dh. Then when he “chooses” a car, he’ll know that it’s dependent on approval from your folks. Why should this be a problem?<br>
Your mom needs to be brought into this discussion. You can’t put her name on the title without any approval from her! You need to respect boundaries a little better. This is not your call.</p>
<p>I’m with New Hope as HImom. As the mother of a boy who was once a teen, I can vouch for insurance rates being VERY high for such drivers. And boys as a rule aren’t the best drivers compared to girls. My father had drivers for his business and the only ones who got into accidents that THEY caused were the young men. </p>
<p>Giving a car to a teen boy without parental permission is just asking for trouble on so many levels, for reasons already given. But also, since the OP has a poor relationship with her father and a prickly one with her mother, why even entertain the idea of “surprising” everyone with a “gift” that’s likely to cause trouble?</p>
<p>I grew up in a family of 7 and two cars in a town with no public transportation. Somehow we managed, even when at one time there were three teen drivers at home. It wasn’t up to anyone else to “save” us from being carless and the pain of driving our parents’ cars.</p>
<p>Everyone thank you for the advice. Although I disagree with some of the reasons: i.e. dangerous vehicle causing death. My brother can have an accident in any car, including my parents’. Also, since my brother lives under parents’ roof and they would be paying for his car insurance, they can limit his driving no matter what my brother feels he is entitled to. </p>
<p>Nevertheless, I decided to postpone this decision until a year from now and see how everything works out with my brother’s driving in that year. At that point of time my brother will be 17 and senior at High School. Depending on the situation my parents might decide that he does need a car and then that gift would be welcome by them.</p>
<p>I don’t mean any offense, but you don’t know what you are talking about. There is a reason I don’t talk to my dad, which was a hard decision I made several years ago. And I certainly would not talk him about this.</p>
<p>I’ll bet you a thousand dollars that if you give your brother a car without clearing it with your parents first, that relationship is going to get significantly worse.</p>
<p>As a suggestion, unless Dad did something illegal or otherwise significantly immoral, not talking with family isn’t very mature. Break the ice, and get a relationship with him again. He’ll die eventually (we all do) and the sooner you can mend the relationship, the better it is for everyone.</p>
<p>Of course, if he is peddling drugs or molesting little children or any of a number of other evil things, then all bets are off. But I’m assuming your parents aren’t drug dealers or child molestors.</p>