Life after Leaving BS - Success Stories
pwalsh
218 replies16 threads- Junior Member
Reading a couple of other threads seem to indicate that a good number of students leave BS for various reasons (academic stress, social issues, LDs, lack of fitness with BS etc.). If we collect all the reasons for leaving BS and what they did after leaving BS would be very valuable to current and prospective students and parents.
Why did you or your S/D leave BS, what did they do after leaving BS (went back to PS, another BS)? How are the problems overcome? It will be great to hear success stories after leaving BS. I hope this information will be useful to parents to catch their kids before they fall through the cracks. This information may also shed light on which BSs are supportive and which ones are hands-off type.
32 repliesWhy did you or your S/D leave BS, what did they do after leaving BS (went back to PS, another BS)? How are the problems overcome? It will be great to hear success stories after leaving BS. I hope this information will be useful to parents to catch their kids before they fall through the cracks. This information may also shed light on which BSs are supportive and which ones are hands-off type.
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Replies to: Life after Leaving BS - Success Stories
It'd be interesting to see proof that BS isn't the be all end all.
The one-year boarding school experience with older D was valuable, but painful because leaving was not voluntary. But, D returned to her thankfully good local school and did fine (as she had freshman year), and used the experience to write about in her college essays (thanks to suggestions here at CC!!!) about what she learned and how she changed and faced future challenges differently. She's done fine with college acceptance to her first choice college.
So there is life after BS, both for those who stay and for those who leave. Many do leave, it is not a good fit for some kids, and can be overwhelming being away from home for the less mature student. My older D was totally overwhelmed mainly by the workload, but the social pressures played a role too. Many of her friends that year in boarding school left too, and they have been doing well, and still stay in close touch with each other.
Thanks for the update, mom. Hugs and continued good luck to your son.
The middle son did one year at the same school as the eldest happily graduated from. We were a bit unsure if it was the right fit for him but he insisted it was the only school he wanted to attend. During that one year he was overwhelmed by the amount of work, he was in almost all honor classes. He hated the food, didn't get along with his roommate, the list goes on. Deciding whether or not to return was agony for all of us! He came home to our mediocre public school. He will be graduating this year. Here are my thoughts-
Turns out all the stress of school happens for him at home too. Just less tears.
Having his friends since kindergarten around has been wonderful.
He wishes he had stayed at a BS, maybe not the one he was at.
He misses the academic rigor and the many opportunities in classes, sports and the arts. We have a very small PS, only 35 kids in the graduating class.
Was it the right decision to bring him home? I'm still not sure about that. Overall I would say yes it was. But if we had done more pushing in the beginning, getting him to look at other schools, maybe the outcome would have been different. He still says we should have forced him to go back.
He is currently applying to colleges. Probably the same ones he would have looked at if he had finished at BS!
The school was very accommodating; they do however report that it is a demanding atmosphere and not every kid is cut out for it.
D is now at a tiny arts/holistic schools and absolutely loves it. In fact it is probably the polar opposite of BS in terms of teaching style and student. SHe made some friends at BS but was uncomfortable with the affluence of much of the student body. Or the display of affluence, at least.
The irony is, when I look at college acceptances for both schools, they are very similar. I think at her current school my D will love to learn. It is not for everyone, I think my S would have liked the competition in the BS, but he opted to stay in the public system and got a great education and preparation for college.
Sometimes situations--peer situations--unfold at BS that neither the school nor the family can control. All I can say, without wanting to disparage the school, is BAD peer situation. In those circumstances, schools will often care less about the full truth than what is politically palatable. DC was hung out to dry by BS. I understand why, but sure it leaves a bitter taste knowing the truth was not even considered, much less supported. Tough lesson at a tender age, would make for a great classic prep school novel.
We'll weather this, too. When college results roll around next spring (or maybe in December), I'll try to remember to post something. But without hesitation, have to say that 2 years at BS was enough; the strong academic lessons and work ethic are now ingrained, so there's really no worry about future academic success.
It seems that your DC has hit the ground running, though, and you have weathered the storm well. Albeit maybe with a few new gray hairs for dad, huh? I bet it all will have a very happy ending when college admittances come around. Please keep us posted!