$10,000 for a dorm room designer?

The article was very unsatisfying in terms of getting to the heart of the mindset and net worth of those doing this. Obviously everyone posting here thinks this is crazy – even if we all agree its their money to waste as they see fit. But I’m curious if any of the posters live in the South and have perspective on what the parents and students are thinking. Are they just so fabulously wealthy that this $10K is the same as a ticket to a movie from their perspective? Or are they projecting aspiration wealth through their kids? Or is there a culture of needing to show off supposed wealth? Or is the culture one of just massively spoiling your kids and teaching them superficiality on purpose. To the latter point, consider the quote from the 18 year old in the article:

Lesley Lachman was taken aback by the dorm rooms, which she described as “completely not doable to live-in.”

I mean, whether you have money or not, that’s just a level up of superficial and spoiled. What kind of bubble have these kids lived in?

And if they can afford to spend $10K on a dorm designer, why send them to state schools when they could seemingly afford privates with a lot more resources per student?

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That’s a good question. I remember reading a while back about how intense and expensive rushing for sororities in the south is. A Google search now brought up a brand new article on this subject. It seems very different from the people I know who’ve rushed. You’d think there would be some overlap perhaps between the dorm rooms and this?

Probably for the same general reason that families in other parts of the country (e.g. Northeast) send their kids to certain expensive privates when their state’s flagship provides a more rigorous education.

I think it’s because the purpose of college in the United States isn’t just about the education, it’s also (maybe even more so) about the social network you form. This is why college in the US is based on a “sleep away camp” model. There exist schools in many parts of the country where the education is beside the point. Instead you are finding spouses, forming friendships with the “right” people. The “right” people in the South do attend big State schools, but they don’t buy their duvets from Marshalls. The “right” people in California don’t attend UC Merced, in NJ they don’t go to Rutgers

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I love the couch and chair and would put them in my house now!

I feel the same about the over the top dorm rooms that I do for over the top weddings, neither are my cuppa, and I do wonder if there is as much energy being put into the education/experience or marriage that is put into the instagram perfect room/wedding day. (our practicality is reflected in our very small wedding 20+ years ago and D24’s IKEA/Target/Marden’s - IYKYK - furnished dorm room.)

$10k? Did that involve 22 pillows and a ceramic :pineapple:?

Lol.

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My daughter’s college did not allow any of the stuff I see in these rooms - no outside furniture of any kind, trash can had to be metal only, no lights or electronic signs on the walls, etc.

Freshman year the RA made her take down her plain brown blackout curtain (bought in target for like $20 and put up with a $10 tension rod) as they decided it was a fire hazard. She had put it up to block out a neon sign across the road from her room (yes, sort of like that Seinfeld episode with the chicken place sign).

My daughter kept her dorm room comforter, which she loved, for almost 10 years (It had traveled with her through many dorm rooms and apartments). She reluctantly threw it out when is literally fell apart.

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OMG I had forgotten the ceramic pineapple story (many here are probably too new on CC to get the reference!)

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@kiddie i think this is that thread, which I think goes well here!

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We could certainly afford the 5k ( the per student cost I believe) but it just wasn’t the norm at the schools my kids attended. Would I have spent if it was and was important to them because their Roomate wanted it? Honestly, yes. This sort of spending does give me a lot of pleasure. My kids were very hard working in college and continue to be. I enjoy doing extravagant things for them. I happily paid for the expensive private dorm. I paid for door to door laundry service so that they didn’t have to waste their time in school with that. Now would I enjoy spending money for these things if I had kids who were not wanting to work hard and were just expecting us to pay for things ? No. But that’s not the kids I have . They are always grateful and very hard working.

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Didn’t bother to read the article because “you do you” and all that. Although we technically could spend some green on a truly designer dorm, it’s against my DNA on general principle.

I should have been an interior designer but never went in that direction. When I moved into my dorm, my parents were kind enough to drive me to school with a full set-up that I spent a year amassing, eager to move out. Tons of kitchen items, Xmas lights (now fairy lights), cute furniture, etc. Kept these items all four years of school. In fact, I am still using everything that didn’t break in my own home to this day (decades later)!

My kid moved into dorm life two weeks ago. Reasonably-sized double room with a roomate. Kid is not a planner like I am. First, we waited to see what the roomate would do. Said roommate has their side decorated in a color scheme and theme that suits them. My kid is picking out their own things, but trying to balance colors they like that don’t clash with the roomate’s vibe.

I did ask the kid to hold off on purchases until we see what the school auctions have going on. One student organized a nice little sale of good condition items graduating students donated. A storage locker was rented out over the summer and earlier this week students could “buy dorm stuff for cheap”. It’s a great idea. Proceeds of this sale fund the storage locker for next year, and frosh students get to shop early for 15-30 minutes before returning students. Win-win.

My kid got a cart, felt laundry tote, desk lamp, hangers, storage drawer and storage file for a whopping $10. Also two strings of fairy lights that don’t seem to light up.

Anyone know how to fix holiday lights?

There will be an upcoming auction of sorts for other items (including fridges). Once that is done, we will help our kid source anything else for their room. We are slowly bringing items as needed (driving distance). Kid mostly needs clothes/shoe storage, but recoils in horror at the concept of a plastic bin.

Their college doesn’t allow the walls to be marred, but students apparently can bring common items into rooms, provided they are vacated in as-moved-into condition. So the students have some leeway.

Kid is a bit impatient to be done with the room, but once it is done, chances are many of the items will stay with them for the next four years and beyond.

We are seriously considering renting storage over the summer to not move things back and forth from home. (Hope the kid can share with someone else to split the cost!)

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Lol - I didn’t even have to open the article to know this was going to be Ole Miss.

Y’all need to see their tailgates for football games. People pay to have tents, tables, and chairs set up the night before the game. You pay someone else to bring in and set up TV’s on game day. That’s just the beginning. On game day, you get up early and decorate your tents and tables. It’s not uncommon for several families to tailgate together. Usually each family takes a game (or two) and are in charge for that week. Custom-made drapes with tie backs for the corners of the pop up tents are hung and coordinating custom table cloths are placed on tables. Light fixtures/chandeliers hung from the center of each tent. Centerpieces with fresh flowers are placed. After you get all that set up and out you go home to get ready for the game. You wear cute outfits/dresses. You bring your food (which you may have prepared or which may have been partially catered) in when you return for the actual tailgate. It’s served on china, Mississippi pottery, or silver. You might go in for the game, but you also might just stay at the tailgate the entire time and watch it on your TV there. There might be more than one TV in your tailgate area for multi-game viewing.

None of this is considered extra or elaborate or unusual. It’s just how things are.






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I’ve lived in Boston for 2 1/2 years and had never heard of Allston Christmas till a few days ago when I got an email from the Stop n Shop I go to. Today and tomorrow they are having Santa there and some small giveaways in honor of Allston Christmas. I’ll be taking my Grandson there today, but I haven’t quite figured out how I will explain to him that actual Christmas isn’t for months!

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Wonder if students applying to ol miss know in advance about this over the top decor?

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Yes, I think most do. Older D’s sister-in-law went there and comes from a wealthy southern family. She most definitely had a dorm room that looked like that and family tailgates that resemble the pictures (FWIW, I’ve seen friends’ pics of Clemson tailgates that look like that also).

The big southern publics (mostly SEC) are unapologetic about the over-the-top dorm/sorority/tailgate of it all. If you come from another part of the country and haven’t done your homework, it’s definitely going to be a culture shock.

There are certain colleges where there is a standing joke that some go there to get their “Mrs. Degree”. A college education means different things to different people. Some are there purely for the academics, others for the social part. Most are likely looking for a combination of both.

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After I made my post, I was tempted to edit it to explain that Allston Christmas was not a store. But I figured I would let out of towners figure it out for themselves, like how to pronounce Worcester and Leominster :grinning:.

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Back in the day, Simmons College, a women’s college, was very popular. it is located adjacent to Harvard Medical School. It was a standing joke that women went there to get their “Mrs. MD” degree.

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Same at my son’s college. The school won’t allow headboards, any extra furniture, most rugs, drapes or curtains of any kind, any type of decorative lights or strings of lights etc. And you can’t show off your room anyway because the dorm room door is a fire-rated door and must never be propped open. Apparently, this is all because of the NYC fire marshal. That’s why I laughed when the article said that the profiled girls “spent about $3,000 for the design company to create a modern-looking, New York City-style dorm room.” A New York City-style dorm room does not look like they imagine it does!

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I was always amused when they get a new anchor on the 6 o’clock news reporting on a fire in “Lee-oh-minster.” You can almost see the coanchor rolling their eyes.

That certainly supplemented skimom’s hand-me-downs

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So after the pictures, I thought to myself “are there rules at Ole Miss” about this?

Quick Google search later, this is from the Ole Miss housing handbook:

I guess the key is to get there early and put the furniture in other rooms.

What surprised me most of all…is the that Ole Miss student housing website is focused on next year already (class of 2029)! Housing applications open in 32 days!

There are a few women on the college FB page who are constantly posting things that I would say are bragging posts. One is the worst. Her most recent post was a designer bedroom in an apartment complex that is extremely expensive. Another parent asked how much a rental was per month and when told was like “oh, that’s more than we can spend” to which the poster responded “nothing’s too good for my child” . Yikes!

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