2 Daughters- very similar stats (4.86 va 4.89 GPA) SAT diff by 20 points . ECs the same , both Varsity players since 9th grade. Today they both find out that their Essay is very similar (same traumatic experience) . DD1 asked me to talk to DD2 about changing her essay topic. I am caught between. They will be applying to 3 of the same Colleges. They are fraternal twins but have always had the same interest. They get along well (hardly fight) but I am shocked that the Common App Essay has become a big issue.
Some colleges admit twin perhaps because they like the same essay twice. Are they apply to the same schools?
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DD1 asked me to talk to DD2 about changing her essay topic.
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?? Why should DD1 get to write about the topic? Why does she think she has some kind of priority over the topic?
A compromise would be that each twin can write about it for essays at colleges that they won’t both be applying to.
As for the 3 that they both are applying to: each twin can use the essay topic at 1 shared school. for the 3rd school, they have to write something else…unless there will be a 4th school that they both apply to.
only DD1 opened up to me back in April that she wanted to write about this traumatic event, She even consulted with her English teacher. I was caught off guard by DD2. DD1 feels that it may jeopardize her chance of getting accepted to her top school. Truth is I’m surprised that DD2 even thought of applying there.
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I like this suggestion: As for the 3 that they both are applying to, 1 can use the essay at 1 school. for the 3rd school, they have to write something else...unless there will be a 4th school that they both apply to.
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my thought is to drop the Essay topic all together and let them come up with something new
My first thought was that ^, @ArkiMom. Either they both keep their essays or they both write about something else, but I don’t think it’s fair for one daughter to call dibs on a topic after the work is done when there was no, from what I know, agreement on it before the process started.
If anything DD1 should speak to DD2 about it herself rather than placing you in the middle of it. If DD1 wants your guidance, perhaps you could be a mediator and facilitate a solution that is fair to both of them.
Is it really a personal trauma, that no other teen goes through? If not, maybe them both picking the topic could show them it was no so unique after all. Many kids lose the big game, have a parent lose a job and have to move, have parents who went through a divorce, had a grandparent die just before a big game or personal event.
I agree that if D1 wants D2 to have a different essay, she should ask herself or suggest they both write new essays.
Maybe they are not unique after all.
If they were my children, I would tell them to add a footnote to their essay for the three schools that they will not accept any offer of acceptance unless their twin sister is also admitted.
Have the twins talked about this? If they have and have not resolved the issue, call a family meeting. Don’t try to resolve the issue for them, instead act as a mediator or facilitator during the discussion (e.g. your views don’t matter).
“If they were my children, I would tell them to add a footnote to their essay for the three schools that they will not accept any offer of acceptance unless their twin sister is also admitted.”
I hope you’re being sarcastic. What on earth makes you think that an adcom would care about an applicant’s ultimatum?
They both had exactly the same trauma…with exactly the same perspective? Really?
@thumper1, it doesn’t seem odd to me that they both experienced the same trauma and that they processed it in the same way.
I think it doesn’t really matter that they are writing about the same event. Many kids will be writing about the same traumatic events. I think the focus of admissions counselor will be quality of the writing and not the event.
If your daughter wants her sister to change, I think they she needs to talk to her about it and you do not need to be in the middle.
You may want to look at the 3 common college’s admission procedures. At some schools, each college within the school has their own admissions that are independent of the other. So if they apply to different majors / colleges within that school, the same people would not read their essays.
Will their essays look alike? If so, that won’t bode well.
It sounds like a bad idea for an essay anyway. Both write another and see if they can come up with something better.
My first thought: you should have declined to get involved. If that’s no longer an option, the next best option is to say to DD1, “You’re right, twins submitting essays on the same event to the same colleges might influence admission. YOU should find a new essay topic.”
However, it is not fitting to try to force the other daughter to change her essay. Imagine the resentment that will cause over time. It’s “taking sides” in a big way.
As twoinanddone pointed out, the traumatic event might not be that unique. I would suggest each DD come up with 3 topics and write draft essays. You could brainstorm ideas unique to each DD individually. One of the topics could be the traumatic event. Certainly, each DD will want to weave in somewhere in the essay that her twin sister was there, too. You might find one of the other essays is stronger. If not, you’ve got to let the DDs work it out. You might be surprised that each DD takes a totally different approach to the topic, in which case no problem. The worst case as thumper1 pointed out is if both essays sound the same.
Stay out of it. It’s between the twins and you do not want to take sides. So what if one confided and went to her teacher? She doesn,t own an event that happened to both of them.
Tough one. As others have said, they may want to re-think the topic. It can be difficult to write about a traumatic even in a way that does not come out cliched. However, if this is really a unique event and they both experienced it, perhaps they can include the twin aspect and how that helped or hurt.
If twin2 took her idea from twin1, or started on it much later, it may be appropriate for twin2 to back down. It will hurt both of them if the essays are too similar. Perhaps twin2 will decide not to apply to twin1’s dream school.
If twin2 won’t back down, twin1 may have to write a new common app essay, if she is afraid this would be a negative.
I agree that they should try to work this out, or at least you should act only as a mediator and get them to talk to each other.
I feel for the girls, but as a side note, I see people suggesting sending different essays to different schools. OP stated this was a common app essay. CA only lets you have 3 versions of essays. If they find a typo or decide to make a change along the way, that limits their choices. I would suggest having the girls not submit multiple common app essays for this, or at least consider the essay count because it could become an unintentional problem later.