Double post
My daughter’s venue gives customers the choice. At her wedding, the bar will be billed on a consumption basis – primarily because she and her future husband are betting that alcohol consumption at a brunch wedding will be fairly modest. We’ll see whether that works out.
I don’t think there are any young doctors or soon-to-be doctors among the guests.
Speaking of alcohol, at some venues you can pay less for guests who are under the legal drinking age because they’re included in the food headcount but not the alcohol headcount. And you can pay even less than that for little kids who get a children’s meal rather than the standard adult meal.
^ same with our venue…the under 21 crowd is $18pp less than regular, drinking adult meals…and the little kids are 1/4 of the adult meals… so will be saving us about $1000 
$18pp for open bar is actually less than I would have guessed.
Just looked at D’s open bar pricing,it ranged from $18 per person for 1 hour to $39 per person for 5 hours, and they had the 4 or 5 hour option. In addition, there was the 20% or 22% gratuity on top of that. There were no guests under 21 so no discount. @doschicos, I believe @gosmom was referring to a $18 discount for those guests aged 18 to 21 who could not drink, not the per person charge for open bar.
We don’t actually have a breakdown for the bar service. We choose open bar for the whole reception. We also have a champagne toast at the table…and I think we have wine during dinner. We have a total cost for each person which includes the cocktail hour, appetizers, dinner, dessert, coffee/tea, and all beverage service. In addition, we will be paying extra for some table decor, and a couple of other things.
The 20% gratuity is on the full bill…including the extra items we are getting.
We also pay 1/2 price for meals for all of our vendors (for us that will be a band, and the musicians playing for the ceremony, and possibly the officiant). We only are inviting two little ones…they will both be two. I’m not sure of their cost! Gotta ask that.
“We only are inviting two little ones…they will both be two. I’m not sure of their cost!”
Hopefully zero or close to it. Can’t imagine they’ll be consuming much at all.
Our bar tab was based on actual consumption/per drink. The reception started at 4pm, and was an outdoor cocktail hour followed by indoor dinner/dancing . Many people arrived early (because the ceremony ended by 2:30, and some didn’t attend the ceremony or had no place to go in-between. The bride’s mom did offer punch in the church basement for those not going back to the hotel, but people headed to the reception around 3:15) so the bar started serving. It was an unusually hot day for Twin Cities, early June. So I think the drinking was more than it might have been under slightly different circumstances.
Is the gratuity added pre or post tax?
Our gratuity was added pretax.
D’s reception is similar to @thumper1 's, although there is a 21% gratuity and 6% sales tax added. The minimum is based on the amount + gratuity/tax, which is good for us in terms of keeping costs down. Vendor meals are less than 50% of the cost per person for guests. Children 12 & under are 25% of the regular cost per person, and 13-20 costs $15 less than the regular cost per person. Bar service is for 5 hours.
Our venue shuts down the open bar during the dinner hour. We will be offering wine to the guests, but this is an additional cost. Vendor meals are very reasonable.
Interesting to hear the different pricing and venue policies. I don’t think we had any vendor meal charges as it was at a inclusive Inn/venue. The only outside people were the hair/makeup, and the florist of which neither were there for a meal.
No DJ?
No, they decided to forgo the cost and do it themselves. They did a playlist, and the grooms Stepfather is a professional musician, so they had all the speakers and microphones for the speeches. It went off without a hitch, and actually less “cheesy” than some DJ’s can be.
Wow! Excellent that they could do the music that way!!
backing up a second-
atom, Did the MOB ASK you to take care of the Alcohol? Had you offered?
Trying to wrap my head around this.
D and FSIL are having an alternative reception that is 146 friends and 4 parents.
They nailed down $1500 for a 4 hours open bar and $1000 for the bartender.
This is in Boston. One brand of each: bourbon, vodka, gin, tequila and mixers.Beer and wine
and non alcoholic drinks–bunch of pg friends.
I have no idea if this is a good price on not but they seem to be please.
Average age guest will be 33. Yes, many medical residents.
H and I are not really excited that she wants us to attend…but lips sealed.
Glad to hear that CT, as I do not think they are hiring a DJ.
My in laws offered to pay for the rehearsal dinner and alcohol … but they only wanted beer & wine. My parents paid for the liquor, because they wanted a full bar. I recall that it was a bit of an awkward conversation, but it was all fine in the end.
DD and FSIL are in charge of beverages/bar situation.
Just talked to a friend last night - her son and his fiance’ are doing a destination wedding to Hawaii (they live in WI and MOG lives in AL) and inviting neither set of parents (MOG is divorced; IDK about bride’s parents). I found that incredibly odd and obviously hurtful to a parent that has done all she could to raise this boy well. IDK if he felt he couldn’t invite his mom w/o his dad (dad left the family, I believe for another woman, when this guy was in MS/HS). The told MOG that this wedding was ‘for them’.
That does sound sad for the MOG, @SOSConcern, but things can be difficult and awkward in families with divorces and remarriages to an extent that people who have never been in that situation may not fully appreciate.
I grew up in a family of that sort and so did my husband. It added a lot of discomfort to the wedding planning process, and our wedding day itself was unpleasant for a whole bunch of parents and stepparents, as well as for us.
If we had to do it over again, we would have eloped. This was, in fact, what we wanted in the first place, but we were foolish enough to let our families talk us out of it.